Today, my daughter was putting clothes in the drier when she yelled, "Mom!! The drier won't start!" I had to explain to her that the door needed to be shut. Her response, "Oh. I didn't know that mattered." She's 15. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I finally confronted my daughter about never using air freshener after she poops. She said, "But I thought flushing made the smell go away!" She's 15 and she actually believed this. FML
Today, my 17-year-old daughter didn't do the laundry. Her excuse? "If it was meant to be done, it would have done itself." This is the same daughter who yesterday tried convincing me she was responsible enough to get a dog. FML
Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to blow-dry the sweat off her armpits instead of showering. FML
Today, I noticed that my clothes had shrunk. My mother seemed to be having trouble with the new washer and dryer so I tried to show her exactly how they work. After my explanation she said, "I know how they work. I shrank your clothes to give you some incentive to lose all that belly you got." FML
Today, I confronted my 18-year-old daughter about her excessively lengthy showers. She said she didn't see the big deal, considering the water "comes free with the house." No dear, it doesn't. FML
Today, I had to tell my daughter that just because markers say "washable", it doesn't mean that you can draw all over our newly-painted walls. She's 15. FML
Today, my daughter put a doll in the microwave "to keep her warm". She's 17. FML
Today, after I was away for a couple of days, my wife told me she’s been doing laundry while I was gone. I'd reminded her to clean out the lint catcher because it might catch fire. I came home to a new dryer and a smoke damaged house. FML
Today, when I went to pick up my daughter from preschool, I found out she'd "accidentally" tried to flush her clothes down the toilet while going to the bathroom. FML
Today, I approached my daughter and told her she needs to clean her room. Her response was, "Thank you Captain Obvious." She's 4. FML
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Top comments
itsjusttofunny 8
you need to teach children things, they never just know them on their own.
myeverydaymylife 21
Wouldn't closing the door be common sense?
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Comments (84)
chocolatefrog28 29
She learned part of the process. At least she was trying which is a lot more than most kids can say, so complaining about a little blooper like that is a good way to disparage her from wanting to do so again.
Cely988 29
Common sense is very rare these days.
Goblin182 27
We have a winner!
HeWillBeLoved105 22
Lol she better marry rich.
bubbles5810 12
One bright egg here.
mosquito19 14
I hope you remind her that her pants needs to be off before she pee or shit.
hurley12 30
And your an adult who doesn't know how to properly spell dryer
ulissey_fml 22
By "your", did you mean "you're "? Don't make too much fun of people who can't spell their own language, or you'll have foreigners like me correct you...
bassfisher100 23
my parents never taught me to shut the dryer door, some things you learn by watching and it becomes common sense (._.)/
mahmoudyf 7
Kill it before it lays eggs. ? jk
jakobiellis 4
is she blonde