Today, my 20 year-old daughter started ranting to me about her latest boyfriend's erectile problems. Trying to be a good dad, I told her all I knew about how to get the boy fixed. My wife decided to stick her head in and say, "Listen to your dad, hun. He knows all about this kind of thing." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to console my drunk dad over his girlfriend breaking up with him. When he said, "You know why we broke up don't you?" I replied, "Yeah, you were fighting a lot, right?" Wrong. I then had to explain to him that his erectile dysfunction wasn't something to be embarrassed about. FML
Today, I found out my 20 year-old daughter has a 46 year-old boyfriend. She met him at her job. When I objected, she told me that I can’t tell her “heart” what to do because she’s “grown” and “in love.” I had to teach her how to wash and she still leaves dirty pads on the floor, but sure, she’s “in love.” FML
Today, I sat down with my daughter to have the sex talk, because she recently started seeing a guy. I mentioned at one point how disappointed I would be if she got pregnant. She went wide-eyed and asked, "Didn't mom tell you?" FML
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Today, my successful, attractive daughter gave me the "Daddy I can fix him" speech about her boyfriend. He brings in no money, exclusively wears old ratty T-shirts and sweats, and always stinks of BO and cheap beer. I have failed. FML
Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back into the house, screaming, "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML
Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back in the house screaming "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML
Today, my daughter gave me the “but daddy I love him” speech when she turned up to a family event with her boyfriend, who was at least 20 years older than her, was visibly intoxicated, stank of body odour and cigarettes, then tried to flirt with my wife. FML
Today, I was shopping at Costco for a romantic evening with my girlfriend, I bought some flowers, dinner, and a super pack of condoms, At the register behind me, I heard somebody say, "Good thing my daughter has a responsible boyfriend." It was my girlfriend's father. FML
Today, my daughter admitted she struggles to keep a boyfriend because as soon as she shares with them her kink of fucking guys with strap-ons and occasionally inserting other items into them, they flee. As a father, this was way more info about my daughter's sex life than I can handle. FML
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Top comments
missyj0 12
Am I the only one that finds it odd to talk to your dad about your boyfriends penis? I mean it's great you have such a tight knit family, but I don't think I'd want my dad knowing about my boyfriend's package.
FatMan23 10
Awkward.
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Comments (134)
kuytsgoldenlocks 1
Just a tad awkward?
Jujubilee 1
Oooh...Burn!!!
erpaderp 17
Tell your wife to get back in the kitchen.
FMLisNotReal 0
Should have told her TMI.
yankfan89 27
That is an awkward conversion he is helping his daughter get laid.
Sarojin 0
how old is the boyfriend? fhl for having ed with a 20 year old gf.
Mourningstar 4
Its good she can come to you tho, you're a good dad for trying
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Well, at least she wasn't complaining, because obviously you're "fixed"! :D
Jos411 3
Hey. Um, is it just me or would any other girl never talk to their dad about something like this. So much awkwardness could've been avoided upon researching it herself. Eff her life. lol
xkristinannx 0
What an always Convo to have with a parent....