Today, as I was driving with my boyfriend, he pointed out what a crappy car I drive. About how the locks don't work, the vents are broken, the windshield wipers are busted, my headlights aren't bright, and a hubcap is missing. Then he said I’m a good match for my car, 'cos we have the same “personality". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he finds his car more attractive than me. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend what her favorite quality about me was. Her answer, "Your car." FML
Today, my boyfriend's car broke down on the way to the gym, so he called his dad to give us a ride. On the way, his dad talked about how much he hates me and our relationship, as if I wasn’t sitting in the back seat directly behind them. FML
Today, I was on a first date with this girl I've been talking to. I met her and she came with me so I could park my car in the student lot. On the way back, I saw a beat up car with its window duct taped up and exclaimed "Haha! Look at that piece of junk." It was her car. FML
Today, as I was driving out of a parking lot, some douchebag yelled at me: "Nice car! Too bad you're so ugly!" It was my friend's car, so I don't even have that going for me. FML
Today, I went for a drive with my boyfriend and his dad. His dad was kind enough to point out at every opportunity girls "that would be better for him than me." FML
Today, my girlfriend's dad let me borrow his car for transportation to work because mine got totaled. This car is a complete dump and I've realized he's only letting me use it so it's my fault to fix the broken things on the car. So far, I've had to replace the battery and two popped tires. FML
Today, I found out my girlfriend is only with me because I'm a mechanic and I fix her constantly broken-down car for free. FML
Today, I drove home in my brand new car, hoping to surprise my girlfriend. She came out the house laughing, saying how funny it was, and how I look like a "twollop" in it. Then in all seriousness, she asked me when I was getting my "actual car" back from the garage. FML
Today, I went out with my girlfriend to a restaurant. After parking up next to a badly parked Audi, I commented, “Typical shit parking by an Audi driver.” Unbeknownst to me, the owner was walking to his car at the exact same moment. FML
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Top comments
Wet_Dream 0
and your sleeping with that!
Bloodknight 22
Kind of an asshole statement there. was he joking or being serious. It's all about context!
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Comments (79)
aghoogha 0
**** him, i think you should Stab him with a knife while he sleeps. Or even Set the bed on fire, while he is tied down.. that will show that S.O.B
Peroxide 3
That's nice
jlannon 0
Because prison is much more fun than a crappy car....
aghoogha 0
this really got me angry, people being judgmental and shit. what kind of car does the ****** have ? A lamborghini murcielago ? or a masserati quarte porte ? Death to ****** HATERS...
redbluegreen 41
He probably drives a silver Volvo S60 R, or a black Aston Martin Vanquish V12 for special occasions, where as the OP drives a red 1953 Chevrolet pickup truck.
Hazy_fml 0
...Need I point out the irony in your post, #16?
the_stereotype 0
ahahaha! #16, WIN
DEVASTATOR 12
kick him to the curb that should teach him
Peroxide 3
Don't worry, im sure all you need is a good oil change. How's your mileage? Do you service yourself regularly?
jw90 18
nice boyfriend ya got there. but at least you've got a car. some people don't. fyl tho cuz ur bf compared u to ur car.
perdix 31
This is so disturbing if you get the metaphors. Locks don't work = She bad dry, frizzy hair styled in an unflattering way. Vents are broken = She doesn't blow. Wipers are busted = She doesn't practice good post-defecation hygiene. Headlights aren't bright = Saggy, misshapen ****. No high-beams. Hubcap missing = Your dental work is unattractive You poor thing. You need to hang on to this guy with every ounce of your being. You're not going to find too many guys who can stand to be in your crappy car with your crappy self. Make that man a sammich.
the_stereotype 0
he said her personality not her physical appearance
TheLetterZero 7
Do you always have to make idiotic, dirty comments while not understanding the FML posts?
fudrick 0
Lol #34 you're dumb as ****
Darling_Cherry 5
LMFAO @ your dental work is unattractive
BritishHobo 0
Anyone who EVER makes the 'make him/me a sammich joke' pisses me off, not because I'm a feminist (I'm a guy) but because it surprises me that there's something less funny and original than ******* Little Britain.
dudette123456789 0
wow ur such a dick!
send3426 24
No, she should leave his stupid ass and find herself a good man that appreciates her. On top of that, he said her personality was the issue, not her appearance. Don't make yourself look so stupid.
Rota 0
YDI for driving a totally unsafe car.
0neiros 14
That's when you pull over and kindly invite him to get the **** out and walk.
moonlight_daze 8
I'm a guy but I too enjoy bitching about my life. So I can understand why a girl would make such a decision. Niceness is boring. Let's have some strife and shit to complain about.. Yeah! Or maybe all you self-proclaimed "nice guys" just aren't very forward with the girls you want.. Of course girls can stop being so damn lazy and start making the first move themselves but whatcha ya gonna?
Redrosesandrain 0
ydi for being overly sensitive.