Today, I was sitting next to the guy I like and he was doing homework. Then, he looks up, his eyes meeting mine. His smooth voice mutters my name as his face inches closer to mine. I can feel his minty breath against my face. My pulse is racing. Then, he says, "What's a pronoun?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in class finishing up an assignment when the guy next to me, my crush, said "I really love your hair." I started to blush then I turned towards him and said thanks, at the same time as the girl he was actually talking to. FML
Today, my crush was giving a presentation in class. I zoned out and began staring off into space - which happened to be in the exact direction of his crotch. When I realized what I was doing, I quickly looked up at his face. He was already looking at me, with an expression of severe discomfort. FML
Today, I was on the subway and saw this cute guy eyeing me. I crossed my legs, tossed back my hair, and raised my eyebrows slightly. As he came up to me, my heart started racing until he finally started flirting... with the girl next to me. FML
Today, I discovered the guy that sits next to me in class is actually a girl. Not only is that bad, but we had to write a paper about each other. I used the words "him" and "he", and read it to the whole class. FML
Today, I was on the bus when my crush told me to come and sit with him. I got all excited, especially when he put his arm around me. He then whispered in my ear "Hey, is your friend over there single?" FML
Today, I went to choir rehearsal at 7:30 in the morning. When the guy I have a major crush on stood next to me, I got really excited, so I tried to sound good. After the song ended, he asked me if I wanted some gum to cover up my morning breath. FML
Today, my secret crush, who sits next to me in Bio, asked if he could borrow my notes. I agreed. It was only after he drove away, with my notebook, that I realized that in the back of my notes, I had written his name 100 times, surrounded by little hearts. FML
Today, at lunch, I told a bunch of people how I had been in love with this guy since freshman year. I made a bunch of jokes about how I was going to marry him and our kids would be so attractive. He was at the table next to mine and looked back at me as soon as I finished. FML
Today, we got new seats in class today. The guy placed next to me, turned, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "The balls are the warmest place on the body" while his hands were in his pants. I'm stuck next to him for the rest of the semester. FML
Today, I made out with the guy I've had a huge crush on for the first time. He wrapped his arms around me, and whispered softly into my ear, "I can't wait to bone you." FML
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Top comments
jSOPURE 3
You mean to tell me the English language doesn't make you hot? :(
junjouromantica 0
Now I see why you like him.
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Comments (253)
livelife 0
oooh that sucks. better luck with another guy (:
ffmmllyaya 0
what's a pronoun.. wth is he in the fourth grade or something.. is op in the fourth grade also??
XYZzzzzzzz 0
hrm... damn good question
pingpongpickle 8
wtf is he retarded?
Demotivator 2
c'mon thats an easy answer... ...Now I could tell you Rafaella Gabriela and Rufus Xavier Sarsaparilla and Albert Andreas Armadillo found an aardvark, a kangaroo, and a rhinoceros. And now that aardvark and that kangaroo and that rhinoceros belong respectively to Rafaella Gabriela Sarsaparilla and Rufus Xavier Sarsaparilla and Albert Andreas Armadillo! Whew! Because of pronouns I can say, in this way: "WE found THEM and THEY found US, and now THEY are OURS and WE're so happy." Thank you pronoun! You see a pronoun was made to take the place of a noun, 'Cause saying all those nouns over and over Can really wear you down.
im_a_squid 25
#239, that SchoolHouse Rock excerpt from the Pronoun song is just spot on. It brings tears to my eyes. Haha, what an amazing thing you have done. x)
theroxors19 12
#239 that was beautiful.
RHOPKINS13 2
Today, I was sitting next to the girl I like and she was doing homework. I looked up and her eyes met with mine. My heart was pounding. Maybe I'd finally get the courage to ask her out. I started muttering her name as my face inched closer to hers. My pulse was racing - I simply couldn't bring myself to do it! Finally, I just asked "What's a pronoun?" FML
ncvolley123 8
what did u say???
Calyx_fml 22
She should have said "us".
jesernoob 13
right?!
junjouromantica 0
Now I see why you like him.
jSOPURE 3
You mean to tell me the English language doesn't make you hot? :(
niirah 0
I think it's his lack of the command of the English language she has a problem with.
zombieattackk 0
#4 is a win
CaptainJellyBean 0
What an articulate bloke!
sillygoosezeus 4
Apparently people don't understand sarcasm, the word "articulate", or both. In any case, I still chuckled.
PhoenixRising 0
Work with it! The best bonds are formed over a mutual love of grammar. I may be a dork, but in my experience this stuff really turns on the hot English majors.
airandfingers 0
Nice one, #2. I don't know OP, either this guy is pretty dumb for not knowing what a pronoun is, or you're pretty young (like 7th grade or younger). If the latter is the case, then at least you're a great writer for your age! You could write romance novels right now!
Malecent 13
or he could be foreign... you kmow because there is more than one country
Pepperolls 0
Whats so FYL about that? I find it very sexy, apart from his lack of intelligence..
twinscrplayer6 0
I find you very sexy
iPhanny 0
Lol #2 xD
synacious 0
He was probably just nervous.