Today, I was working a midnight shift when a guy came in drunk and was trying to get me to come home with him. I said I had a boyfriend. As I said this, my manager, who has no teeth and B.O, said he was my boyfriend. I will never live this down with my co-workers. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I learned a co-worker called and awoke my boss at 3 a.m. to complain that I'd been "rude" to him. All I'd done was make a disapproving face because he'd been drinking and he was slobbering drunk, and wanted to charge his purchase to his employee account, a definite no-no when not on the clock. FML
Today, I was working the night shift when a guy came in smelling like alcohol. He kept muttering his order, so I leaned over the register to hear him better. My ear now smells of vomit. FML
Today, my boyfriend, who is also my boss, was giving me a blowjob at work. Halfway through, his boss knocked on the door and I had to quickly get dressed and slip out the other door. After leaving, I realized that I was still barefoot and I had to walk back to my desk in front of my colleagues. FML
Today, I was closing at work when someone came in ten minutes before our closing time at 2 a.m. and placed a huge order. I couldn't turn him away because he's my manager from my other job. He was drunk. FML
Today, after I had an excellent one night stand with a guy yesterday, I saw him at work. He was a client my boss was trying to talk into a deal. The guy recognised me and accused my boss of sending me to seduce him into signing the contract. The deal fell apart and my boss is livid with me. FML
Today, I got sent home early because a large fire broke out at work. I was greeted by the sight of my cocktard of a "boyfriend" making out on my sofa with another woman. He actually had the audacity and brass balls to claim he thought she was me. FML
Today, I got yelled at multiple times by my boss because my boyfriend didn't show up to work. FML
Today, at work I wrote up my boyfriend (whom I've been secretly dating, because I'm his supervisor) for being $40 short on his register. Our policy is to write up anyone short over $10. He got mad and told my boss we're dating, and I was instantly fired. Then I got dumped for being a "tattle-tale". FML
Today, I met a new guy at work who wouldn't stop hitting on me. We ended up on a six-hour shift together watching a pool, so we were wearing nothing but bathing suits when he began grabbing me inappropriately. When I confided in my female coworker about it, she told me that he was her husband. FML
Today, I overheard my boss talking about me on the phone. Turns out he was drunk off his ass when he gave the go-ahead to hire me, and he's now searching for any excuse to legally fire me. FML
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Top comments
Grand_Cookie 21
He was probably trying to help you get rid of the guy. It's kinda rude that you would than act like it was just as bad as some drunk idiot.
jinxthejinx 0
Aww, geez, he was just trying to help you out, OP… but it sounds like you're just an ungrateful bitch. I would have thanked him and moved on.
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Comments (87)
macskapingvin 0
Is this a suitable time to suggest a threesome?
ThePillow 0
It never is.
c8750 2
Depends on the people. There are times it's okay. LOL
jinxthejinx 0
Aww, geez, he was just trying to help you out, OP… but it sounds like you're just an ungrateful bitch. I would have thanked him and moved on.
JVonDahl 9
Grow up, it sounds like he was just trying to be nice and help you out. Quit being shallow and thank the one person who was kind enough to try and help. Bitchy much?
thathayygurl 4
hey maybe your boss was trying to do you favor by getting rid of the drunk... plus I doubt he wanted anything in return. you just are really into yourself girl... get yo head straight.
W4X 0
He wanted a *******.
DocBastard 40
You could've told him you're a nun. If he's drunk enough, he'll believe you. But then he could have tried to break you of the habit...
RedPillSucks 33
Ouch!
giselless 5
haha clever!
thirdbase1733 0
Hey he helped You out, be thankful.
love0128 5
I just want to know where you work at since your manager has no teeth and is still able to be around the public as a manager at a job! I'm guessing a bar?
c8750 2
Agreed with 19,22, and 23. The manager was just trying to help
Seana_fml 6
WTH he backed you up to defend you and your non honor. Get over yourself.