Today, due to an incident with the dishwasher, a coat rack and my bathrobe, I ended up locked out of my house, naked as a jaybird. I had to hide in the backyard for several hours until my family got home from their various activities to get back in. They still haven't stopped laughing at me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I locked myself out while taking the trash downstairs. I was wearing pajamas, slippers, and a winter coat over nothing else. My neighbor offered to help, then spent ten minutes trying not to laugh while I explained that my keys were sitting on the kitchen counter. FML
Today, I locked myself out of my dorm room. I walked across campus, shoe-less and in nothing but my bathrobe, to find someone who could let me back in. Turns out I hadn't even shut the door properly and so it never actually locked. I can still hear the guy laughing at me. FML
Today, I got locked out of my house in my pajamas while trying to take the trash out. My neighbor offered to help, but only after taking a picture of me for "future laughs." FML
Today, I fell in the shower and the doors jammed shut. I was stuck in there for hours, waiting for my parents to come home. They had to open the door for me while I was still naked inside. FML
Today, while taking a shower in the dorm bathroom, my roommate thought it would be funny to steal my towel, robe, and key. I spent over an hour waiting for someone to come into the bathroom so I could ask them to bring me something to cover up. FML
Today, I got myself locked out of my apartment whilst taking the trash out. I was wearing pyjamas, holding a banana, and I'd left my phone inside. My neighbours learned a lot about me, seeing as no one recognised me and I had to explain that I actually live in the building. FML
Today, I was showering at my dorm. I had my clothes locked in a locker and my towel and robe hanging outside the stall. Someone took off with my towel and robe, which had my keys. I had to walk down three flights of stairs to get an extra key in nothing but a plastic shower curtain. FML
Today, I locked myself, drunk and naked, out of my hotel room. FML
Today, after a few beers, I was exiting the bathroom of a loud house party when the door jammed. I had to climb out through the shower window. It was fool proof until my foot got stuck. I hung outside the house upside down in the dark yelling for an hour before someone figured out where I was. FML
Today, I took a shower in a beach house we're renting for the week. Once I get out, I realize the house doesn't supply towels, my entire family was outside in the front yard, my phone was upstairs, and there are no blinds. I stood under a ceiling fan naked for 20 minutes trying to dry off. FML
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Top comments
Glowworm56 27
I'm extremely interested in knowing just what the heck happened that caused such a hilarious sounding incident.
Kurliez408 32
just.... how? followup please!
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Comments (20)
Glowworm56 27
I'm extremely interested in knowing just what the heck happened that caused such a hilarious sounding incident.
Kurliez408 32
just.... how? followup please!
Max Curry 6
please do elaborate
onceuponatime456 16
If it had been one of them would you still be laughing?
Regulate 21
Try not exiting the house without clothes and a key next time. Lifehack.
batgirlandrobin 14
So the dishwasher is overflowing... In a panic you take off your bathrobe to soak up the water... Then realise you need to wedge the washer door shut somehow to keep the water contained, so you go out into the back yard to get an old coat rack that's out there for some reason and looks like it would do the job, forgetting that your keys are in the bathrobe pocket...? I mean, that's the best I can come up with and it barely makes sense. More details required!
DanielleinDC 34
I need to hear the explanation for THIS one.
RichardPencil 32
Why is it "naked as a jaybird?" All animals are naked! Humans are the only animals that wear clothes (usually.) Why not "naked as a dog?" "Naked as a turtle?" "Naked as a halibut?"
Jaeger Keller 6
It's actually J-bird, as in "Jail bird", there is no animal Jaybird -- it refers to the (naked) walk taken from the jail showers to jail cell on initial incarceration.
joeyl2008 29
So you pull the dishwasher door open with such force it causes you to fall backwards and on your way out the door your bathrobe catches on the coat rack pulling the robe off of you while also knocking the door shut
chickensheep 15
It took me way too long to figure out what a co-a-track was