Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him that I had none, he yelled angrily, "Who comes to this city without money?" I replied, "Apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, trying to do a good deed, I gave a homeless guy a $10 bill. As I walked away, he yelled after me, "You fucking bitch!" FML
Today, while walking down the street, a homeless man walked up to me. He opened his mouth to say something and I immediately said that I didn't have any spare change because I was late for work. He then said "I was gonna ask you for the time, dickwad". Apparently he wasn't homeless. FML
Today, I came across a street musician. He looked extremely well-fed already, but his music was pretty good, so I gave him some spare change. As soon as I turned away, he started screaming at me for being "cheap", and chased me half a block before running out of breath. FML
Today, I walked to Starbucks. On the way a homeless guy asked me for change and I lied and said I had no money. On my way back, Strawberry Frappuccino in hand, the same guy recognized me. He followed me for 3 blocks, swearing and yelling at me. FML
Today, while I was walking home, a homeless man saw me and didn't ask for change, but how much I charged. FML
Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
Today, I tried to give some change to a homeless man. My girlfriend pulled me away and ranted about how homeless people are all basically bastards who deserve their misfortune, and that I shouldn't give "our" money away. FML
Today, I was accosted by an angry homeless man at the recycling center, since I refused to give him my saved up bottles and cans. He insisted that he needed it more and I was "poaching his turf". I needed the recycling to put gas in my car, just to make it to work and hope I could make it back home. FML
Today, I saw a homeless man on the street and decided to give him the dollar bill I had left in my wallet. He said "Thank you" then as I turned to walk away, he muttered "Cheap-ass cunt". FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
jailbot 7
I applaud your snappy comeback! I bet I'd have said the same thing, I mean, what right does a homeless man have to complain about people having no money to give him?
Dashiell 0
I heard that homeless people in prime locations can make up to $50,000 a year.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (216)
re2K5 0
I'm actually a military member stationed here in Korea... never had dog myself. Good to know that I don't have your approval if I ever do, though. :)
rachaelberri 0
HAHA shouldn't have said that but its still funny XD
arcades_fire 0
I don't see how anyone could think he seriously deserved that. Excellent choice of response.
cutebebe778 0
Props to you OP. I cannot STAND some homeless people..they annoy the hell out of me..and most of them are fakes anyways. Even if they're not, they got themselves there initially. I wouldn't vote FYL *or* YDI on this one..because really, it's neither. But again, props to the great response.
AshleyRose784 0
why would you antagonize the homeless man?
Oliive_fml 0
HAHAHA nice response!! it seems worth it.
genius_man16 1
lmao, epic response. You sir win at life. If that was me I would have been laughing my ass off the whole time that loser was chasing me.
Gunmanj 0
Epic wins everybody gets at least one
miss_mojo 2
HAHA. love it.
airplanefood 0
Honestly I've just seen/talked to too many homeless people who just...I don't know how to describe them. Maybe it's just the hobos in Los Angeles, but there was a man who had a sign saying he was hungry, so I bought him a cheeseburger (he was outside of a McDonalds) and when I gave it to him, he said "oh...is this...for me?" with a look of disgust that just said "I wanted money not food you idiot". Plenty of my friends have similar stories. I know it's sad that they can't get over their drug addictions, but I'm certainly not going to help fund their drug runs, and I don't blame people who steer clear of homeless people or "antagonize" them.
Luckster 0
Oh good! I'm not the only one who's had that happen!! Just a few years ago, there was a homeless man who liked to sit just outside of a large shopping district with a lot of fast food places around the place. I went out of my way with my own money to buy him a HUGE meal from Arby's cause he looked like he hadn't eaten in a week. A nice $10 to ensure he'd be well fed. When I offered it to him, he bitched me out for spending the money rather than giving it to him and threw the foot into the street. I don't hold any place in my heart for these people any longer. I hate it when my kindness is taken advantage of.