Today, I was snuggling with my boyfriend on the couch. We ended up falling asleep, and when I woke up I felt a slobberly substance running down my face. It turns out, my boyfriend drooled so much, it filled my ear and overflowed onto my face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was watching a movie with my new boyfriend. I got tired so I thought it would be cute to fall asleep on him. He woke me up and said, "You got me wet." Thinking it was a joke, I said smoothly, "That's what she said!" He replied "No, really." I looked down, I'd drooled all over his shirt. FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend and his parents, who I haven't known very long. I ended up falling asleep. That doesn't sound so bad, until I woke my drooling self up by snoring extremely loud. FML
Today, while having fun between the sheets with my boyfriend, his allergies got the best of him and his nose started running. Every time he kissed me he'd drip snot onto my face. When I complained, he said I was being insensitive. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. It was going well until our braces got caught. Out of pain, I tried to pull away, which made my eyes water. Then I sneezed in his mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. Trying to be suave, he put a Kool-Fruit between his teeth and motioned for me to kiss him so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do so, I inhaled, swallowing it. He then had to watch me dry-retching as I tried to get it back up. FML
Today, I was washing my face and I started rinsing the soap off my face with my eyes closed when I felt something gooey on my face. I opened my eyes to realize I had been rubbing snot on my face from when water got up my nose and apparently snot came down with it. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the train after a long day. I woke up to find that I’d been drooling onto the shoulder of the stranger next to me for at least three stops. He said nothing, but when I stood up, there was a wet patch shaped like my face on his sleeve. FML
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Top comments
tukker 0
I saw this going a different direction when i was reading it...
vampirate 0
ULTIMATE. WET WILLIE.
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Comments (67)
cerebellum_fml 0
He is hungry get him something to eat
Icutu7 0
YDI for having a boyfriend who dreams about bacon
Bloodknight 22
Eww, lots of nasty ass FML's today!
UndeadMetalhead 0
ahhh hahaha, thats epic...i made an account here just to say that, your boyfriend is awesome, if that were me i would have been pissing my pants laughing!
Nakedsquirrel 5
I'll admit, before I finished reading I thought you had gotten sleep creeped.
masquerade08 0
That adorable in a completely disgusting way. I would be grossed out, yet still find it cute... I'm weird like that.
nolimits 0
You don't swallow either, so quitcherbitchin.
lynn2010 0
That sounds like something my bf would do...and then laugh about it later. I probably would too :P
Erindub 0
I think its cute. I drool all the time on my boyfriend but I guess its the price he pays for always snuggling right up next to my ear and snoring loudly. What goes around comes around : $
confizzled 0
Oh no my boyfriend drools, my life is like sooooo ******!! Waaa waa waa. Get over it. And YES I am feeling bitchy
habesjn 0
I know, right?