Today, I asked my boss for a raise. I pointed out that due to a technicality, if he hired someone to replace me, he'd have to pay them more anyway. He said he'd gladly pay more for "someone who knows his goddamn place" and made it clear I'll be jobless very soon. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I asked my boss for a raise, but he told me my position is a legal requirement that produces no profit, unlike every other employee, ergo if I’m feeling ungrateful about my generous wage, he will happily fire me and hire someone else at minimum wage, saving the company money. FML
Today, my boss found out I had applied for a much better paying job. He told me I'd do a better job and make more money there. Then he fired me. FML
Today, I met with my boss hoping to hear about a possible raise that had been promised many months ago. He then told me that the only way I would get a raise was if I found a better paying job and took it, and that the company was in no position to offer anyone a raise. FML
Today, I asked my boss for a raise. He responded with, "Who the hell are you?" FML
Today, my boss was fired by the board. A few days ago, he dropped several strong hints that he was going to promote me soon. FML
Today, I worked up the nerve to ask my boss for a raise. Today is also the day I found out my boss has a shitlist of employees he wants to fire, and that I'm now on it. FML
Today, I went to ask my boss for a raise. He laughed at me and said, "That's hilarious because I was going to ask you if you could take a pay cut!" FML
Today, the person recently hired to work in my spot during my days off started at a higher hourly rate than me, after I have been here for nearly three years. I asked for a raise and got a dollar more; meanwhile, my regional counterparts make 4 dollars more per hour. FML
Today, after putting in 110% at my shitty job for two years straight, my boss told me point-blank I'm too good in my current position for him to ever be able to justify promoting me. FML
Today, my boss asked that I add the work of our third coworker's position to my shift because he's never finished his duties. She gave us a 50 cent raise to "babysit" a 60-ish year-old man. I responded to respectfully fire him or pay me 20/hr. His last day is Friday and he doesn't even know yet. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
PANDORUM89 21
Well putting it that way probably wasn't the best plan. Maybe you should've highlighted your worth to the company rather than whatever the hell you said.
ZoroMiHawk 25
Why would you point out that he'd have to pay more anyway if he hired someone else? You're pretty much arrogantly demanding for a raise because that's his only option anyway, not asking. Next time you ask for a raise, back it up by pointing out how your previous and current contributions to the company have made you a valuable asset to the company.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (72)
Attacksloth 33
You indirectly blackmailed him. That wasn't just "pointing out" something. Raises are rarely given automatically. Usually, bosses hand them out for good performance. The only reason you cited was "if you hire someone else they'll have to get paid the exact same." - That doesn't send a message to him that you're a good employee, it sends a message that says "I might have other options on the table" or something related. We don't even know how good of a worker you are or what company policies are at your workplace. The boss was harsh, but you need more tact. YDI
Dcm210 19
Maybe tell him to forget about the raise and you like your job? Look for a new a job anyway.
at0micmin3r 23
Challenge your boss! THAT'LL get you what you want.
dc2fresh 15
just stay humble with what you have
onlychildFTW 34
Never point that stuff out. Haha.
Andrewluz 5
Santa Clause is going to town
Shade1982 21
Lately, it seems like 90% of the work FML's are from the US. Are workers laws/rights really that terrible over there?
WarriorOmen 25
Yes. Yes they are. The US system just gets more and more backwards and corrupt overtime.
ShenaniganNinja 20
Actually the laws aren't that terrible. It's just that businesses intimidate employees into not reporting them, and that people really don't know their rights.
rx46590 3
what did you expect idiot?
JOFreeman 13
You need to work on your skills in discussing a raise. Sorry, but with what you said you kinda deserved that reply.