Today, as I walked out of the local store, I noticed a young girl was sitting on the curb, crying. I nudged her with the Snickers bar I had bought earlier, thinking she needed it more than me. After looking at it, she yelled, "PEDOPHILE!", punched me in the balls, and then ran away screaming. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at the mall, I saw a girl crying that her ice cream had fallen on the floor. Feeling generous, I bought her a new one. She threw it on the ground, laughed, and came over to her mom and told that I was bothering her, so the mom called security. FML
Today, I was at the mall and I saw a kid crying. I asked her "What's wrong sweetie, are you lost?" She ran away screaming "Help me!" I ended up having to explain to a dumb mall cop that I'm not a perv. FML
Today, while walking to the corner store, I noticed a car full of teenage girls. As I got closer to the store, one of them who was still getting in, says, "Hurry, here comes a pedo!" I turned to look and see who they were talking about, but there was no one behind me. FML
Today, I was out grocery shopping when some pervert decided to slap my ass as they walked by. As I turned around to confront them, I saw that the culprit was a 7 or 8-year-old boy. I was so shocked, speechless and angry that I couldn't even decide how to handle the situation. FML
Today, while shopping, I saw a little girl and her mom. The girl was pouting so I tried to cheer her up by asking her if she was a princess, because she was so pretty. She smiled but her mom looked at me with disgust and told me to, "Get lost, pedo." I'm a 17-year-old girl. FML
Today, a kid came Trick-or-Treating at my house. When I told her it was still one more day until Halloween, and that I didn't have any candy, she wound-up her fist, punched me in the groin, and ran off laughing. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my girlfriend's family. Her 7 year old brother told me he was feeling sad, so I tried to give him a pat on the back, but it turns out he had a bruise there. He yelled out "don't touch me there!" In the middle of the mall. Now her parents think I'm a pedophile. FML
Today, while shopping at my local grocery store, a young boy came up behind me and pulled my pants down while snickering. I was so shocked and horrified that I dropped the f-bomb. His mother yelled at me for "ruining his innocence". FML
Today, while out shopping, I noticed a seedy bum kept following a girl around the store. Trying to be a good samaritan, I trailed them into the street. The bum jogged up behind her and looked like he was about to grab her, so I ran up and tackled him to the ground. Turns out he was her father. FML
Today, my son asked for candy at a supermarket checkout. I said no. He laid on the floor and began screaming as if I'd killed his pet rabbit. Other parents nodded at me in silent sympathy, while strangers judged me with their glares. I bought the candy. He still screamed. FML
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Top comments
bombtastic 10
Damn. So much for being nice. Kids these days..
cmtxbe 6
I don't know man. I'd be freaked out too if some random man (who I happened to be eye to dick level to) poked me with something hard...
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Comments (156)
tencentsakiss 19
I'm not sure how young we're talking about, but if she's as young as she acted here, you never should have offered her a bar with peanuts in it without asking her mother. Allergies, OP!
tencentsakiss 19
*Or father* I'm sleepy.
Rihaan 4
At least she didn't take the snickers bar.
Mossears133 15
Yeah, now op can keep it! :D
fairgirl99 8
At least you know she is not stupid
MrClean17 15
If you drive a suspicious looking van you automatically forfeit your right to console strangers with candy
j_cat187 20
Was the bar opened? I don't know about you but if I was a girl alone on a curb and a strange man offers me food with the slight chance that it might spiked with something, I would be hesitant to eat it. Punching someone in the balls does seem to be a bit of an overreaction.
itsgen 16
Sucks you can't do a good deed with out society killing it
dpap9457 2
Here, have a snickers...... You get a little sad when you're hungry
lovelyohhmee 8
Why would you give her Candy? Why not ask her if she was ok??
timelessone 16
Not only that he "nudged" her with his candy bar. You just don't nudge little girls with candy. All I'm sayin...
StaceeeP 23
well you are always told to say no to strange men with candy and puppies
appelflap 22
That is very much the same comment I was about to make. When I was young my parents always warned me about these things. Although it never happened that a stranger offered me something , I was always on guard because of the lecture they gave me about it.mit's good to know it might happen, but shame people suddenly see pedophiles everywhere.
YoshiPL 8
welcome to the world where being nice is something that is not acceptable