Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML
Today, I was at work and I needed to pee. In my haste, I forgot to lock the door. A coworker walked in on me and I bolted up mid-stream to slam the door back shut. I had pee down my leg and pee squishing in my shoes for the rest of the day. I can still remember his tone of voice, yelling, "Sorry"! FML
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I really had to pee during one of my college lectures. I finally worked up the nerve to leave the room while he was lecturing, and ran frantically to the bathroom. Once in there, the urge intensified to the point I couldn't hold it. I peed my pants while standing in the bathroom. FML
Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML
Today, I woke up desperately needing to pee. I sat up in bed, naked, and tried to decide if I should get dressed, or run for it and hope no one saw me. I guess I took too long to decide, because as soon as I stood up to run, I pissed on the floor. FML
Today, while in the airport waiting to board, I got the sudden urge to pee, so I ran to the bathroom feeling like my bladder was about to burst. I was so focused on relieving my bladder that I failed to notice the diarrhea covering the toilet seat and the wall behind it until I was sitting in it. FML
Today, I peed myself in the dressing room after work when I sneezed. Someone else just walked in as I was trying to dry off my jeans with paper, and probably smelled that I had peed myself. FML
Today, I was so drunk that I pissed myself in a hotel hallway while wearing a dress. My shoes squished all the way back to the room. FML
Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend when I really had to pee. I tried to get out of the aisle in a hurry so I wouldn't disturb anyone when I tripped, landing on the people in the row in front of me. FML
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Top comments
XHerobrineX 4
..... It couldn't have gotten any worse :)
ConnorBrown36 5
That would really piss me off
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Comments (114)
MLIPFA 0
Have no shame. Pee where you wish.
MassaKerr 9
Since you already made yourself look like a fool, might as well have flipped a table in the process...
bethcox 4
The imagery of you tripping over your own feet is hilarious :')
KUSH45 0
****** dumass
BlackBlazeCobra 16
At least you're a guy. Would have been more awkward to pee outside as a girl.
CanadianCutie22 16
good job. lol
loveistwisted 10
Everyone trips. Not to embarrassing. People laugh about they're immature. And could have said you left something out in your car!
5t3ff1k4h 45
Because getting up to get something from the car in the middle of a speech is so much more respectful than just leaving for a pee. One's a little more important than the other.
ginglederf 6
Plus how does he explain the part ware he pissed himself?
ginglederf 6
. . . Wait that's isn't how you get up to pee?
G1ZZY 0
so much for 'quietly'
SimpleGr33n 4
Haha that's what I'll do if I have a kids MWUHAHAHA!
kat2812 1
what? why?