Today, my father bought a pair of fancy noise cancelling headphones. He doesn't realise that the noise cancelling function only slightly muffles the moaning and screaming in the porn he's watching. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I bought some noise-canceling headphones. They work well. Too well. My mom came home, unpacked her shopping, walked upstairs, knocked on my door, opened my door, and found me jacking off to a porno, all without me hearing a thing. Fucking hell. FML
Today, I was woken up by the sound of my dad blasting porn on his computer. FML
Today, my boyfriend found some noise-canceling headphones that he forgot he had. Once he adjusted them and put them on, he sat down and asked me to tell him about my day. FML
Today, my dad came to my room to tell me he’s going to take a nap and didn't want to be disturbed. About 5 minutes later, my speaker started broadcasting the moaning voice of a woman clearly having sex. He's never borrowing my Bluetooth speaker ever again. FML
Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML
Today, I bought noise-cancelling headphones to help me focus while working from home. They're amazing. I can no longer hear my timer, my doorbell, or my smoke alarm when I burn my lunch. FML
Today, my dad came into my room, looked at my laptop, and said he could hear the porn I was watching all the way from his room. I wasn't watching porn. We soon realised it was actually coming from his mobile phone. FML
Today, I called my dad to let him know some details for my wedding had changed. It would have been really nice if he had paused the porno I could clearly hear in the background. FML
Today, I muted the TV just in time to hear my mom yell at my dad about how their sex life is "non-existent". FML
Today, my neighbor turned down his loud music that he's been playing for months, only to turn on a porn movie at maximum volume. FML
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Top comments
l_ 19
I don't think he understands the purpose of noise-cancelling headphones.
zefronke8 25
Oh...oh god
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Comments (39)
zefronke8 25
Oh...oh god
trevorr_16 25
Isn't that just amazing?
gijojo_fml 9
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Better then hearing your sisters making porno with tons of guys or is it idk but I hope he figures out before he traumatizes everyone
gijojo_fml 9
Really how is this a down vote
dietcoke09 25
It seems like you're including a personal experience in that comment..
Martinv9 7
?
sophzxc 15
I am so disturbed by the image implanted in my head by your vivid FML. I need brain bleach.
TonierShadow 19
He does realise noise cancelling only blocks out outside side not internal sound. They have headphones just for that too.
l_ 19
I don't think he understands the purpose of noise-cancelling headphones.
renrioku 15
I am sure he does, I don't think OP understands the purpose of them. Could be that neither of them do.
WhiteMagickz 16
How does OP not understand the purpose of them?
Tripartita 45
I should hope they're loud enough to let others know they need to back off! Can you imagine having to return noise canceling headphones because people aren't able to hear the **** you watch?! That would be humiliating!
pjsr 33
Yes! Yes! Your FML is so awesome! Keep going. Yeah, that's it! Yes, oh yes!
kharwood1208 14
he does understand, that they cancel outside noise, not cancel noise from traveling out of the headphones, right?
ssaej 1
Lol