Today, the button on my husband's pants popped for the 4th time. I already used the strongest thread and buttons. He's obviously put on some weight around the stomach, but he won't listen to reason and still blames me for my sewing, which is making his pants "turn against him". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I'd finally reached my goal weight. I went into the office where my husband was, to show him the new size 8 jeans I'd bought. He responded with "I wouldn't buy any more clothes, you'll be putting the weight back on again soon." FML
Today, I leaned over to pick something up and heard a loud "pop" from my waistline, followed by a "clink" on the other side of the room. My pants button had popped off my pants. Time to lose some weight. FML
Today, I was bragging about how I had lost 10 pounds. Grinning, I pulled my shirt up and tried to show how big my jeans were on me. Instead, the button flew off my pants. FML
Today, my husband is becoming more uncivilised the older he gets, as I had to remind him to put trousers on while we have guests in the house, and over dinner he was picking his belly button at the table. FML
Today, my boss had to order some more work pants since mine were worn out after 7 months. He told me the next set I would have to buy myself, since they usually last workers about 2 years, and I must be treating them too roughly. I didn't want to admit that my thighs rubbing together ended up shredding the fabric. FML
Today, I found out my trousers have actually been slowing ripping on the side, after I'd been boasting to everyone I have lost weight and that, “My trousers are literally falling off me.” FML
Today, my husband ruined the laundry once again. He forgot to empty his pants pockets before washing them. Last time he left an ink pen in them. This time it was a strawberry. FML
Today, the whole time my husband and I had sex, my stomach flab violently slapped my thighs. The harder he pumped, the louder the slapping got. Time to lose some weight. FML
Today, I told my husband I want to lose the baby weight I put on with my recent pregnancy, and once I succeed I will go on a clothes shopping spree. To this he remarked, "So either way I'm spending money; either on food or on clothes." FML
Today, my boyfriend bought me a pair of jeans. I couldn't fit into them, and he reacted to this by saying I've gotten too fat for him, and he can't be with me anymore. I took them off and saw they were a size 4. I've been a size 8 for the past 2 years, and he knows this. FML
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Top comments
Genius_Kitty 27
Tell him that his dick is too big and he needs new pants. He will believe you then.
Wizardo 34
Tell Jabba the Gutt to stop eating like a Sarlacc, might help.
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Comments (66)
sammiaaron 16
how dare you have such a negative influence on his pants. you monster!
ThrottleJockey 36
The struggle is real for many of us. Especially after the holidays.
black_worm 3
Buy him some new pants that fit and rip the tag off the old ones and use your sewing powers to sew the old tag on the new pants
ViviMage 40
You don't want to reset the buttons on, the fabric is forcing it to pop. Buy a pants extender, which gives an extra inch
smxiricky 23
buy him some new pants with a bigger size say it would look sexy on him and that you like the fact that it hides his ? o.O so it's a surprise
interesting33 37
I recommend getting him to sew it on!
kelizsaiz 4
I'd cut the starter seams in the crotch of his pants. that way when he bends sits squats they rip open. You can honestly claim only to have resewn the button. maybe then he'll get the idea to stop weight or buy bigger pants.
clair_brodie 35
Tell him to go buy new pants or sew the damn thing on himself.
TheWadeStar81 1
Tell him to sew his own pants then!
samlovesham1234 9
Denial: Not just a river in Egypt.