Today, I surprised my girlfriend with flowers and dinner reservations for our one-year anniversary. She looked confused and said, “Wait, we’re counting from the first time we hung out?” It turns out she thought we were still “just talking.” She also has a boyfriend. It’s not me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I brought my girlfriend flowers. All she managed to do was to say, "It’s been a year since you brought me flowers." FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out for dinner to a fancy Italian restaurant for our one year anniversary. After giving her some roses, freshly baked cookies, and a thoughtful poem I wrote for her, she started laughing and asked for her real gift. FML
Today, I surprised my girlfriend with roses. She surprised me by getting back together with her ex. FML
Today, I went over to surprise my girlfriend of two years with flowers and dinner at her apartment. After I knocked, a handsome young man answered the door. Thinking I had the wrong apartment, I apologized, only to hear my girlfriend's voice call from the background, "Baby, who's there?" FML
Today, in the middle of our one year anniversary dinner, my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend showed up declaring her love for him. They left together and I had to take the bus home. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she didn't know we were actually dating. FML
Today, I went to surprise my girlfriend, who was at work at Target, with flowers. I asked the employee at the entrance if she was there. When he asked who I was, his face lit up red and he started profusely apologizing, stating, “She told me you guys broke up.” before guiding me to her area. News to me. FML
Today, I was spending time with my boyfriend for our one year anniversary. Trying to be romantic, I told him that I loved him and I was so glad I was with him. He responded by giving me a thumbs-up and turning back to the TV. FML
Today, the girl I've had a crush on for a year finally said she'd go out with me. On the way over to pick her up, she called me and said she couldn't go because she was going out to dinner with her ex-boyfriend to talk things over. She asked if she could use the reservations I had made. FML
Today, I was having a romantic dinner with my girlfriend when she said she had a confession. I expected something cute. Instead, she told me she’s been "reconnecting" with her ex for the past month... and wants to go back to him. FML
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Top comments
speedy_rudolf 8
have you had sex yet? if yes, you're her side-piece. if no, you might want to get yourself into therapy...they'll explain your problem
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Comments (1)
speedy_rudolf 8
have you had sex yet? if yes, you're her side-piece. if no, you might want to get yourself into therapy...they'll explain your problem