Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was working out at the gym doing squats. There was a girl there that I wanted to impress so I loaded up the bar with a lot of weight and began to do my squat. As I was going down I farted so loud that I began to laugh and fell backwards. Everyone in the room just stared at me. FML
Today, I was doing squats in the gym. During a set, when I squatted deep down, some poop came the fuck out, like a rocket. It was so embarrassing, and luckily there were fewer people in the gym than usual. FML
Today, I was working out at the gym. A very attractive girl was watching me work out, so feeling like a stud, I tried to lift a really heavy weight. I failed, got trapped, and watched helplessly as she walked away laughing. FML
Today, I took a huge shit halfway through my gym workout, one of them half-wet, messy, stuck in your butt hairs. Three rolls and an anus with the feeling of carpet burn later, I proceeded to the bench feeling strong. At the twelfth rep, I sharted, right in my brand new gray pants. FML
Today, I tried to impress a girl at the gym on the squat rack, but let out a big fart. She was grossed out and laughed at me with her friends. Her boyfriend came over and told me I was a dead man, and I'd better leave. I'm now the proud owner of a year membership at a gym I can't go to. FML
Today, I attempted to break the record for the heaviest squat in my local gym. A small crowd witnessed me breaking the record as well as releasing a huge fart. FML
Today, I went to my gym and tried a new workout machine that had just been installed. I set the weight too high and ended up stuck halfway through a lift, making weird struggling noises. Most people around me stopped and stared as I awkwardly dropped the weights. FML
Today, I went to the gym. I tried out a new machine where you do one-arm weightlifting. I took my time to get into a good position, then set the machine to the lowest weight possible. I couldn't even lift it an inch. A bunch of buff guys nearby saw me and burst out laughing. FML
Today, I was at a power lifting meet when a girl I really liked walked in. Trying to impress her, I increased my bench to 350, when I have only done 300 before. She then watched me drop it on my chest, breaking my breast bone, and also crying in the process. FML
Today, while working out in the gym, I spotted a very attractive girl. I decided to pick up the heaviest dumbbell to show off how much I could curl. She ended up driving me to the hospital because I burst into tears after tearing up my bicep and deltoid. FML
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Top comments
tothenifty 1
this is great
pinkcrayola 0
Well if she's into that...
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Comments (178)
mariet_fml 23
You idiot. You could have seriously hurt yourself. Did you ever think that talking to her might be a better strategy?
princess151617 4
EW !!! tmi
redmane 21
OP hates proper punctuation. There are commas where there should be periods.
Homer_J_Simpson 0
D'oh!
j_cat187 20
Ahhhhhfraaaaaapppp!!!
br0ccoli 15
You went from "I am the shit" to "I just shit" in 2.3 seconds.
perdix 31
Why would she give a shit exactly how much weight you are lifting? Evidently, you do . . . literally.
muFilter 19
Well, I can't imagine she'll ever forget you now.
gabybilyk 5
LOLOL you went down and pooped infront of a girl ....
Falassalond 16
You can actually find his picture on rotten dot com. And the woman you can find a live vid of on YouTube.