Today, I found out I was dead. Yes, you read it right! Apparently, the pickpocket who stole my wallet two days ago was murdered and since his face was quite unrecognizable, they "identified" him with my ID from my wallet. My mom, who heard this on the news, got hysterical and started trashing my room in "grief." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out my identity was stolen. The person got credit cards in my name and didn't pay the bills, which has ruined my near perfect credit. The worst part about all of this is that I can't turn the person in. It's my mom, and sending her to jail wouldn't really work out for anyone. FML
Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML
Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. Several hours later I realize that I can't find my wallet. After looking all over my house and then the store parking lot, I had my credit cards cancelled. On the drive home, I feel something under me. It was my wallet. FML
Today, I was pickpocketed. I didn't realize until I stopped to get breakfast. I went back home to see that my dog had taken my wallet and had ripped and torn it up. I was pickpocketed by my own dog. FML
Today, I arrived home to find my cat dead and note saying, "Sorry, I tripped over him." Not only is my cat dead, but I was robbed by a polite thief. FML
Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML
Today, I found my dead phone that had been missing for two weeks. I turned it on to see that I had only gotten 2 text messages during the two weeks. They were both from my mother. FML
Today, I discovered my own mother has been stealing money from me for months when I opened my savings box to find it empty. FML
Today, I bumped into a man on the street. I apologized and he picked up his wallet. To clear the awkward silence, I pointed out that his wallet looked like mine. It wasn't until I was on the next street that I realized it was my wallet. FML
Today, my boyfriend had always told me that his mom was dead. Apparently he just meant she’s dead to him. She’s actually a con artist. I just met her for the first time, after learning she impersonated me, stole my savings, ran up credit card debt, and bought 3 cars. FML
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Top comments
TwoBytesCarley 27
You would think the police would have picked up that he wasn’t you by looking at the rest of the body..you know..not being female.
spinningrecords 14
Did you report that your wallet was stolen?
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Comments (5)
spinningrecords 14
Did you report that your wallet was stolen?
RichardPencil 32
Your mom was hysterically thrilled to not have to deal with you anymore and turn your room into a home gym. It's a good time to go somewhere else and take on a new identity.
TwoBytesCarley 27
You would think the police would have picked up that he wasn’t you by looking at the rest of the body..you know..not being female.
Brightside86 31
Time to build a new life with 0 debt? I wonder how hard it is to claim your an illegal immigrant and get a new US identify?
tiptoppc 21
Pretty hard. I’ve heard they started throwing venezualen’s back into a country they didn’t emmigrate from, IE mexico.