Today, as always, I have a very weak stomach. I'm in Japan right now, and all the unfamiliar foods set me off every time I eat. I can choose between having a great time and starving myself half to death, or sitting in my hotel room all day with stomach pains and diarrhea. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, like most days, no matter what I eat, my stomach does not agree. FML
Today, everything I eat makes me sick, so I don't know what to eat anymore now. My BMI is low and I'm absolutely starving. I can't even eat rice. FML
Today, I'm sick with a stomach flu. For the last 5 hours, I've been going back and forth from the couch to the bathroom. Each time I get into the bathroom, I have to make a choice of whether to sit on the toilet or kneel by it. Each time I have to clean up the other mess. FML
Today, I have the stomach flu. If my belly growls, I have 30 seconds or less to get to the bathroom. I can't go to the doctor for fear of shitting my pants on the trip there. FML
Today, I was diagnosed with food poisoning for the third time since moving to this base in Japan. My husband keeps cooking questionable meat and vegetables from the commissary because he thinks the food from a Japanese grocery store is radioactive. FML
Today, I hate my body. If I eat anything at all, even a piece of fruit, I get terrible stomach cramps, and yet if I go too long without eating, I get gassy diarrhoea. FML
Today, I was on holiday over the Christmas period and ended up with food poisoning. I spent most of the time on the toilet. I think I’ll stay home next time. FML
Today, I'm on spring break on a tropical island, visiting family I hadn't seen in years. They invited me out to eat, and won't take no for an answer. All of this would be wonderful, if it weren't for the fact that I've been vomiting to the point of expelling bile and dry heaving for the last two days. FML
Today, I went out to eat to celebrate getting over the stomach flu. I hadn't eaten solid food in over a week, so I was really excited and ordered my favorite dish. It gave me food poisoning. FML
Today, my roommates decided to do some experimental baking. To be supportive, I tried one of their creations. I've been alternating between vomiting and diarrhea for the past hour. My jaw is sore from vomiting, and I can barely muster the energy to flush between "switching sides" anymore. FML
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Top comments
your_ma 27
Split the difference. Eat some rice and have a nice time :)
JustDerpin 11
Find a McDonalds. Problem solved. c:
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Comments (107)
MidnaLink 35
All I know is, stay away from Mochi Balls.
Tidus0 17
But mochi is nice as deadly as it is to old ladies
SmokingUnicorn 8
Wasn't there a similar FML a while ago? Though I might be wrong...
babe7260 30
Yep there was!!!
Michael_92 20
Yes there was...even the comments are similar. What are the chances?
flutter4 7
Are you pregnant? That sounds like me when I was expecting.
jjh1978 11
Seriously, take some pepto bismol before every meal the liquid not the chewables it'll significantly reduce the likelihood of you having such a violent reaction.
bubo_fml 11
On a queasy stomach, I'd rather eat sushi & other fine Japanese cuisine rather than some fatty-assed American food!
madgrinchhatter 12
There are locations of KFC and McDonalds etc. In Japan. Just eat what you know.
perdix 31
How come "great time" and "diarrhea" are mutually exclusive? "Some people say it's funny...everybody!!!!"
redmnky21 8
knowing u have a weak stomach, shouldn't u have worked to building a tolerance before ur vacation?
abasio 1
You're in Japan not North Korea. There's western food everywhere, I know some Americans who've been in Japan for years without eating much Japanese food.
Tidus0 17
When I went to Japan back in 2007 we were eating a shit load of maccas. What's better is their small size is equivalent to Australia's medium size.