Today, my dog started barking very aggressively. Thinking she'd started another gruesome fight with my older dog, I jumped up from the couch, spilling my coffee all over my laptop and dress, and knocked over a vase my grandmother gave me. She was barking at her own shadow. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dog started barking at literally nothing in the middle of the night. I spent 15 minutes convinced there was a ghost or something in my house, only to realize she was barking at her own shadow. FML
Today, I went to let my dog inside because she was barking. I saw my neighbour standing at my fence, screaming that she was going to kill my dog with a shovel for barking at her. My dog was only doing it because my neighbor was putting her trash in my garbage bin. This isn't a new thing. FML
Today, my dog overturned and ate my trash, leaving coffee grounds and dog puke all over my floor. She also ate the broom. FML
Today, I was sitting in my room watching TV when I heard my mother obnoxiously yelling for the dog. Minutes later she stomped into my room, swatted me over the head, and yelled at me for not answering when she called. She actually got my name mixed up with the dog's. FML
Today, I was woken up by my dog scratching at my door. After a while of this, I finally got up to let her in. When I opened the door, she looked at me, threw up, and scurried away. FML
Today, I had to watch my grandparents' dogs. Unfortunately, my grandparents forgot to tell me that their new dogs bark non-stop whenever anyone else is in the house, which inspires the older dogs to do the same thing. The result: Five dogs barking incessantly, for hours on end. This is exactly why I'm a cat person. FML
Today, my dog chewed through his leash, so I had to take him inside to prevent him from running off. I went to bed. I woke up to torn-up blinds, half-ate sandals, and a very, very anxious cat due to my dog running after her and trying to sniff her butt. FML
Today, I yelled at my dog for waking me up growling and barking out the window. He was doing it at the person stealing my car. FML
Today, I laughed at my grandma's chihuahua poodle mix, as it barked at me entering the house. "What are you going to do, nibble me to death?" is apparently enough to make it jump and bite me. I needed five stitches. FML
Today, my mom was in a really bad mood, so I stayed in my room to avoid her. It didn't take long before she barged in and started bitching about my dog, who'd pissed her off by acting too happy. Yes, she's actually that insane, and I have to deal with it on a daily basis. FML
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Top comments
kenshinjapan 2
It sounds like someone's sleeping outside tonight!
Miss_Random 0
That was the dog's plan. And it worked.
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Comments (76)
kenshinjapan 2
It sounds like someone's sleeping outside tonight!
HSOMGF 5
And it's not the dog.
BAMF18 0
bazinga!
Skullcrusher 5
you're dumb
forthepainx3 0
wroof :D
GCHoorah 0
reasons why I won't get another dog haha
Myrenhi 0
Reason why I only keep tortoises as pets. :D
MissBunny25 0
21, your tortoise is SO cute!! :D
marinkovski 0
do you think everything is so cute? haha
MissBunny25 0
haha pretty much :)
chlorinegreen 27
reason why I only foster dogs. it's like babysitting, nothing permanent. I get to spoil (to a certain extent) then send them off to their new mommy.
cryssycakesx3 23
you take the dog from it's mom and then give it back?
b70valkyrie 0
look before you leap! :) ouch...
j300zx 0
Oh man... my dog barks at flies. Haha
icadragoon 11
My dog used to chase and eat flies, very entertaining.
MissBunny25 0
my dog eats flies... lol
ChibiGirl5 0
I think all dogs eat flies
MissBunny25 0
oh... *facepalm*
d0gl0ver16 0
my dig eats flies too...very funny but weird at the same time :D
d0gl0ver16 0
dog*
josephhhhhh 0
aright so. we all agree that dogs eat flies?
C6Racer 0
No
MissBunny25 0
60 your puppy is adorableeeeee :D
GarryG 0
cats are better :)
BAMF18 0
**** your cat
QueenOfBoredom 0
no no no *********** is a big no no
Exhausti 0
Cats are stupid..
Lustuu_fml 14
54 - So is your picture.
tabasorus 0
lol 59...
tashaburr 0
hey retard, socialize and take your dog out more often so it's not a chicken shit
DrShaco 2
calm down brah
PSQ91 6
Chill dawg
sammy92 0
funny^ but 9 has a point
tashaburr 0
dogs tend to be more tempermental because of lack of socialization. they'll pick fights with other household pets and can be more skittish. (both which are mentioned in this fml) don't blame the dog blame the owner! F the dog's life
MissBunny25 0
46 your puppy is so cute :D
d0gl0ver16 0
I know right? I have a dog too his name is spike :D
denvan 0
Next time look both ways instead of tripping on yourself.
Happygofucky 0
Eek, not cool. I always manage to spill my coffee one way or another, usually doing something way less important than the OP :(