Today, at work, some little girl went in the bathroom for quite a while. Came out for two minutes and went back in. She then came out with her finger clutched in a paper towel. One of the other coworkers went in to check the bathroom. The little girl wrote "Hi!" with her own poop. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to check on my 2 year-old daughter in her playroom, since she was being awfully quiet. I walk in to see her finger painting with her own feces on her kiddie table. FML
Today, my daughter went potty. Just as she always does, she came up to me and announced, "I flushed, and wiped, and shut the light off." Then she did something brand new. She covered my face with her hand and asked, "Do these fingers smell?" They did. FML
Today, a little girl at my work had an accident. She asked me to help her change, and as she was changing she stuck her hand in her vagina to make sure all the "peepee was gone". She then put that same hand on my face to balance herself as she finished changing. FML
Today, I went into the tanning room at work, where the lady in there last had decided the trash can was a toilet and pooped in it. Before she sat, she took the time to wrap the edges in paper towels, I guess in case anyone else had done this before her. I had to clean it up. FML
Today, I was babysitting my friend's two year-old daughter. Within 15 minutes, she had crawled out of her crib, taken off her diaper, and smooshed her poop in between the cracks in the floor. I put her in the tub, left to get a towel, and came back to her pooping in the tub. FML
Today, I'd just finished cleaning the bathrooms at work when I saw a young boy go in. Of course, I thought nothing of it until I had to use the bathroom myself ten minutes later. The kid had taken a shit and missed the toilet completely. FML
Today, at work, I came back from my break to find a child covered in mud. Turns out it wasn't mud. One of the other children had taken all of the poop out of their diaper and smeared it all over the floor, walls, and other children. The other teacher hadn't noticed, and I had to clean it all up. FML
Today, I was using the restroom when a little girl tried to open my stall. It was locked, so she slid under the door and tried to have a conversation with me while I was pooping. FML
Today, I used the restroom at a department store. While I was in my stall, I overheard a little girl say to her mother, "I see someone wearing pink!" I remembered that I was wearing pink just as she finished her thought, "…and she's pooping." She was peeking at me through the stall. FML
Today, while the kid I was babysitting was in the bathroom, he called to me "I need some help in here." Worried I ran to the bathroom and asked him what was wrong. He needed me to wipe his butt. As if that weren't gross enough, just as my hand was under his butt, he pooped again and laughed. FML
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Top comments
Sessee 4
Aw, how sweet, she watches 2 girls 1 cup.
Big_Blue_Sumthin 0
Nothing says love like messages wrote with your own feces.
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Comments (129)
lalaloveit 0
ooh shit... that's reaally gross.
blue16 0
i don't get how this is an FML?
guitardedman 0
i dont know how 160 people could say you deserved it...thats ******* gross and if you have authority at your work then i would go bitch out the parents. if you're a busboy or something expendable then **** it, but if you are assistant or manager or something than you shouldve made their parents clean that shit up.
RiverRelic 0
I think I may do that at work today. But instead of Hi, I'm going to write the Gettysburg Address.
defiantawakening 0
did you freak out at her parents?
lolwut_fail 0
That child has some issues. And I don't want to know where that finger clutched in a paper towel ended up...
erinoty 0
thats gorss lol but its not a fml..cuz..its not your kid. and your not the one that had to clean it up. so...its just kida amusing.
on_a_boat 0
That is disgusting, but I don't see how it affects YOUR life. :
leero 0
I agree with everyone else, it doesn't sound like it affected you so not really an fml. Now, see, when you work at a public pool where someone smears their crap all over the walls of the stall and you have to spend 20 minutes spraying it with a hose and dumping soap on it and picking up pieces of it to flush and THEN your manager yells at you for ruining a roll of toilet paper... then your life is f*cked.
NoBounceNoPlay 0
#25 This person didn't deserve it. It's not the employee's job to watch other people's dumbass kids… I mean, unless this is a daycare facility, or something. Even then, I don't think anyone deserves to clean some kid's smeared shit out of a bathroom. OP, I hope you had a nice, long talk with her parents.