Today, my granny has been constipated for the past two days. She is too weak to get out of bed, so I ended up trying to dig the poop out of her butthole with a spoon. Yay me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was stuck in the car with my grandma for an hour as she described to me how she had looked through my great grandma's poop to make sure her calcium pills were being digested. FML
Today, I found out my grandma has been slipping laxatives into my food. Apparently, I was constipated once as a child and "once constipated, always constipated." FML
Today, due to medication I am taking that causes constipation, I have become all too accustomed to using a disposable rubber glove to dig crap out of my own butthole. FML
Today, after 4 days of constipation, I finally pooped. Sadly, I was not on the toilet. FML
Today, I've had such bad constipation during my fourth pregnancy that I have now had to manually scoop the poop out of my ass to get things moving again. FML
Today, my grandmother helped out by cooking a dish for me. It was so sweet of her, until I ended up having diarrhoea because of it. Now I'm worried to breastfeed my newborn with her food in my system. FML
Today, I stepped in a turd. Not a dog turd, my grandmother's turd. FML
Today, my grandmother opened the bathroom door to find me eating a spoonful of Nutella while on the toilet. She is convinced that I was eating my own shit and will not stop telling everybody. They believe her. FML
Today, after having horrific constipation the day before, I finally got the rock hard turd out of my system. Things got awkward as I cried out in pain and my mom asked me what was wrong. Realizing the dining room and kitchen was nearby, I said "Never mind, it's gross!" I think she figured it out anyways. FML
Today, I'm taking care of my bedridden, 94-year-old grandma. She woke me up at 6 a.m. only to tell me her UTI is still there. Later, she made me interrupt my 15-minute-dinner a total of 4 times because she wanted things like "more lotion in her buttcrack." FML
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Top comments
weeping_willow 25
What in the ever living **** did I just read?
s_ve 7
I feel like that’s elderly abuse... have you ever heard of laxatives. A spoon? How does that even work. That sounds painful.
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Comments (15)
weeping_willow 25
What in the ever living **** did I just read?
Tom O'Halloran 9
you had to want to do that, for whatever perverted reason. even kids know that laxatives assist those that are constipated..... so, did you film yourself doing this?
s_ve 7
I feel like that’s elderly abuse... have you ever heard of laxatives. A spoon? How does that even work. That sounds painful.
RichardPencil 32
You may have just confessed to a crime. Even if she asked you to do so, she might be too demented to be considered of sound mind. Whether you go to prison or keep scooping her ass, it sounds like a... ...wait on it... ...shitty situation.
PryderPlayer017 5
Or perhaps a...shituation 🤔
oneonta 8
if it is that bad, s.u.p.p.o.s.i.t.o.r.y.
jriley4u 17
Metamucil. Apple juice. Prune juice. Laxatives. Iffy chicken. Hell even sugar free gummy bears are all better alternatives. Ya perv.
kt1973 3
Iffy chicken... lol. Good one.
RichardPencil 32
Q: With friends like that, who needs enemas? A: Granny
Jaymail 19
I thought this was a monitored page. Why did I have to read what I just read?
Jillian Cosby-Kelly 15
my story wasn't okay, but THIS is?
Ambrily 27
Now I wanna know what your story was, to be considered worse than this one.
rotflqtms_ 21
WITH A SPOON?!?!?!?!