Today, it was just too hot. I stripped down and, being home alone, pranced around nude, lip synching and playing air guitar to some music. I was getting really into when I opened my eyes and looked out the window to see an old man with binoculars on his terrace. He wasn't birdwatching. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after getting out of the shower, I was in a good mood. So I decided to run around the house naked, then play air guitar while air drying, just for fun. My blinds were open, and the men in the Fedex truck in my front yard did have fun. FML
Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML
Today, I was home alone, blasting music, dancing in my underwear, singing into a wooden spoon. I turned around mid-performance to see my landlord standing in the kitchen. I’d forgotten about the maintenance appointment I'd scheduled. FML
Today, I got naked after coming home. It's super hot where I live and I wanted to cool down before getting dressed again. As I was standing there, minding my own business, the cat I'm pet-sitting for a friend reached up and clawed me on the vagina. FML
Today, I was getting dressed in my bedroom with the blinds open and had nothing covering my top half. I thought my neighbours wouldn't be able to see in through all the trees, that was until I heard someone wolf whistle and one of my neighbours running away. FML
Today, I got out of bed and immediately went to the window as it was supposed to snow today. I saw a man walking his dog and he waved at me. I waved back enthusiastically and realised I was naked. FML
Today, I thought I'd take advantage of the lovely weather and sunbake topless in my grandmother's back yard. My grandma went up the street to do some shopping and didn’t tell me that men were coming to mow the lawn. I was laying on my back. FML
Today, I was home alone, and enjoying my freedom decided to walk around naked blaring my radio. What my mother forgot to tell me before she left was that a guy was coming to fix our dish washer today. Imagine our mutual surprise as I danced around the kitchen while getting a drink. FML
Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML
Today, I was home alone, and decided to do some naked cleaning just because I could. After half an hour of liberating nakie-dusting, I turn around to see my boyfriend and his best friend gaping at me open mouthed. His older brother however gave a creepy smile and the thumbs up. FML
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Top comments
homedoggieo 0
Curtains. A sound investment.
midget_chinese 0
lol technically he was.... but in all seriousness, FYL for having an overly observant old neighbour
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Comments (97)
midget_chinese 0
lol technically he was.... but in all seriousness, FYL for having an overly observant old neighbour
lmtlmt 7
What do dirty windows have to do with it?
Kiwi_Splash 0
YDI for prancing around naked without shutting the curtains. Seriously, how could you not expect something like that?
midget_chinese 0
how are any of these a reply to my original comment?
bloodthorn 4
YDI for being a *****
Jankae 0
Then dont comment on it. organized ******, its his post and everyone rreplied
spoo 24
repeat, but the previous one was ages ago...
letitbe56 0
Yeah...there are a lot of FML's like this actually. I've stopped keeping track.
KumoFF7 3
YDI FOR LIKING THE JONAS BROTHERS
_electricbonbon 0
YDI FOR BEING A GODDAMN CINNAMON ROLL. **** YOU.
governator 0
If you are ugly, then FHL for going through the trouble...
frannytrois64 0
Hahah lol yeah I agree. Every town has at least 1 pervy old man. YDI for giving that dude a strip show!
FarSide 23
He was exhibitionist watching.
cheeter 0
he wasn't giving the old guy a show!! he probably never noticed they were open. seriously I wouldn't care about the windows until herbert the pervert starts looking at me.
Macromartyr 3
grow up midget. there's a reply for you
joeyohe 0
it's girl that wrote this fml not a guy
homedoggieo 0
Curtains. A sound investment.
AAAAHHHH12 2
Brilliant. Now if only the OP knew of this sensational invention beforehand...
spoo 24
one poor old guy would have had one less experience in life. I know thats wrong, but as a guy I fail to see the damage done here :/
cthulhu1138 1
Excellent idea. It's surprising how many people don't seem to comprehend that people can look into windows as well as out of them.
Skull_300 0
Yeah, you cheap ass, get some curtains. I hope the old guy was pounding one out for ya!!!
AloysiusWeasley 15
@#57: ...You fail to see the damage in some creepy pervert staring at a woman enjoying herself in her own home? I would feel violated and unsafe, and knowing there was there was that sort of creep living nearby would make me want to carry around more weaponry than I usually do, and not to mention sucking the joy from my daily activities, as I would then feel like my every move was being watched. I hope the OP called the cops.
starberries 0
You don't have a right to privacy in your own home if you leave the curtains open. In fact, you can be arrested for indecency.
look_n_laugh 0
investing in blinds is a good idea
escape2music 0
#2 i agree. OP how stupid can you be to prance around butt naked with the windows open? YDI.
overkill_78 4
It could be worse. He could have had a video camera.
perryscherry 0
This
GiddyXD 0
lmfao broo.
xyourstruly3 0
people these days
dannnn_fml 0
like yerr mom
Kiki_2_u 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Honestly how rude of a guy to look at a naked woman...... YDI for being an idiot
roundnproud 7
i still remember that seinfeld episode
NancyPotatoes 0
LOL me too.
cheerleader25 0
she didnt know he was watching?
elliee2llie 0
Oh I thought it was a dude?
salle_fml 0
I'm sure it wasn't nice but I can't see how your life is ****** because of this?
Antivirus_fml 0
OP, YDI because you are a douchbag!
mrlucky4444 0
Creepy neighbour: 1 You: 0
quirinus 0
well, he was birdwatching :)
plexico 4
You must be British. Here in America, we don't use the word "bird" to mean "woman." In today's parlance, we can say the man was "howatching!" :)
sparid 0
who the hell says parlance.. you freak.
plexico 4
Smart people. On the IQ scale, I would qualify as a freak. I'm sure you are sliding down the slope on the lower side of the bell curve.
letitbe56 0
A better question is, who doesn't say "parlance"? It's a very useful word, and it's got a very elegant sound to it. So much better than "vernacular", which sounds like a fungus.
alyssamichelle35 0
nice use of vocabulary number 32
john_bell 0
I know who say parlance, people that have parents who aren't related
nodayliketoday 0
I'm developing such a crush on plexico.
plexico 4
Thank you, letitbe56 and alyssamcihelle35, I thought discriminating readers like you might enjoy the juxtaposition of the refined word, "parlance," with the vulgar slang, "ho." nodayliketoday, I'm blushing. PS: I can't wait until sparid sees "juxtaposition!"
x5d13 0
Plexico, you brighten my day.