Today, in an effort to be more healthy, I bought a pack of protein bars as a substitute for snacks. I ate all 5 of them in one sitting. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had 16 freakin' protein bars as a meal, the only meal of the day, as well as 5 apples after. I'm feeling like Yellowstone erupting in my guts right now. It hurts as fuck. FML
Today, I ate two Fiber One bars for breakfast and now I can’t stop farting. FML
Today, I stopped at a mini-mart and bought a family-size bag of potato chips, a tub of dip, a box of toaster pastries, and some snack cakes. The guy at the counter said, "Wow, someone's hungry!" I told him it wasn't all for me, paid, and left in a huff. It was all for me. I ate it all by that evening. FML
Today, I was running late for work and skipped breakfast. At a red light, I noticed a granola bar in my bag and so I took a bite, only to realize it was actually a dog treat I'd stuffed in there days ago. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store, and I realized that all I bought was cat food and $30 worth of protein bars. Yes, I have become THAT single woman. FML
Today, I found out the "free" protein bars at my gym are actually for a fundraiser for children's cancer. I've been taking one every day for the past two weeks. FML
Today, I decided to quit smoking. During my lunch break, I tried to ash the KitKat bar that was in my hand after I took a bite. FML
Today, after I completely starved myself for a week and exercised every day in an attempt to lose weight, I instead gained 5 pounds. FML
Today, I went to the drive-through and ordered 5 cheeseburgers. I told the cashier that some of them were for my girlfriend. I don't have a girlfriend, and I ate all of them by myself. FML
Today, I started my new health kick with granola for breakfast, salad for lunch, and hitting the gym after work. I was so proud of myself, until I couldn’t take it anymore and binged at McDonald’s. My health kick lasted 11 hours. FML
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Top comments
Tripartita 45
Normally, FMLs require a little humor or a twist; yours just sounds depressing.
decado 6
They usually have a fair amount of fibre in as well so be prepared for a reaction from your butt end at some point in the near future.
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Comments (21)
Allayyyyy194 6
That's not how it's supposed to work....
CrazyFastRapper 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
My FML did not get approved when someone killed my dog in front of me but yours did by eating food. What the hell
Tripartita 45
Normally, FMLs require a little humor or a twist; yours just sounds depressing.
CrazyFastRapper 7
Oh ok. Thanks
Vampirequeen346 8
Trust me, I would have done the same ?
loucypher 2
Well at least you've decided to eat healthy here are a couple of tips, have fruit handy, drink lots of water walk, walk and walk.
decado 6
They usually have a fair amount of fibre in as well so be prepared for a reaction from your butt end at some point in the near future.
moondoglou420 17
Your eating habits have expanded the size of your stomach to the point where you won't feel full until you've eaten an unhealthy amount of food. You're gonna have to not give into your impulses for a while if you want to be healthier.
sallyisadoggy 0
Awww, A for effort.. with more will power and dedication, you'll reach your goal!
Donut_Wizard 23
Protein bars are not intended to replace something as a healthy alternative. They are meal replacers to be used to nourish yourself during an intense workout. They will most likely be less healthy than what you are replacing in your snack.
vb68 26
YDI eating healthy is not eating protein bars, it's eating real food
RichardPencil 32
Just sit there on the couch and watch your muscles pop out!