Today, I took my dog for a walk. He became friendly with another dog, and I reached down to pet them both. Suddenly, an old woman ran up to me and whacked me with her cane repeatedly. Apparently, her previous dog had been kidnapped by a woman who looked a lot like me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking my dog when a lady approached me, commented how beautiful she was, and asked to pet her. I obliged and next thing I knew I was pushed to the ground and maced. She made off with my dog. The police is unable to locate them. FML
Today, I got mugged while walking my dog. He seemed to be OK with it. FML
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when another dog barked at him. My dog ran, pulling me with him. I fell to the ground in pain, with my hand still holding the leash. FML
Today, I entered my neighbors’ yard around a shorter corner than usual. Their old dog is getting a bit slow, but unfortunately only in her head: By the time she recognized me as harmless, she had already run up and bitten me. FML
Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went over and helped her up. Instead of thanking me, she called me a pervert and slapped me around with her cane. FML
Today, I had a date with a woman. She brought her dog along. Everytime I touched her, her jealous male dog began to bark and tried to bite me. FML
Today, as I was walking my dog, some self-righteous animal activist berated me on how it was animal abuse to put my dog on a leash. Despite warning her, she crouched down to undo it, my dog charged at her, giving her a gash on the cheek. She kicked my dog for it, and is now threatening to sue me. FML
Today, I came home on crutches. My dog was immediately afraid of them, and came running towards me, growling and barking. She ran right into me, knocking me over. FML
Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML
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Top comments
hunny_kat 0
You should have kicked her in the kidneys and then apologized and told her that she looked a lot like another old woman who had previously hit you with her cane for no reason.
survivalism 0
That crap is annoying. Take the cane and throw it next time.
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Comments (112)
fangsupKELS 0
Pics or didn't happen
defsdgdh 4
Lmao #10 knows what's up
intrepid00 0
You should have hit her back with a bigger cane. Of course, she would only strike back with a bigger one but that is when you build an even bigger one.
allstarplayer324 0
Hit her back with her own cane.
xoxo9171 0
haha wtf
drinkupgorgeous 0
It happens! I swear. When I was 10, some people who lived down the street from me stole my dog, and refused to give it back. Ugh.
Lehk 9
sue her and get a restraining order against her.
yaktazuki 0
This is why I hate old people
lucksnothear1 0
old women always end of being violent no matter how slow they walk
giebs22 6
Did the old woman really run up to you? If so, why did she even have a cane? If she was that old, would she really not be wise enough to put her dog on a leash? If she's already lost one dog before I doubt she would not take more precautions in the future. This FML has some serious discrepancies.