AnonThoughts
Fighting fit
Today, my body is so messed up that I pulled a muscle in my side while farting. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
clitorasaurus
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
Canada
Many such cases
Today, I pulled a muscle in my arm while wiping my butt. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I gave myself a hernia while farting. FML
sadface
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
Australia
Ouch
Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML
Anonymous
Flemington, United States
Today, I realized how weak I truly am when I tore a muscle in my hand trying to discreetly fix a wedgie. FML
Anonymous
King of pain
Today, I somehow strained a muscle around my ribs that make any movement or pressure almost unbearable. In other words, breathing is just about possible, farting is excruciating, and I’m praying I get diarrhea, otherwise there's no possible way I’m going to be able to shit without passing out. FML
foreveralone15
Fake it til you make it
Today, I sprained an arm muscle while pretending to lift weights. FML
Bad at life
Today, I pulled a muscle in my face. Chewing gum. For the second time. FML
j4y
Canada
Today, I went to the gym to try to get into shape. I pulled a muscle taking my sweater off in the locker room. FML
wtbfiber
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
United States
Give me strength
Today, my stomach muscles are still sore from yesterday. Not because I was doing sit-ups or working out or anything, but because I have to work that hard to take a dump. FML
soundslikeadumbcommentersituation
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Brampton, Canada
Hear this?
Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
And that's why we let 'em rip and don't contort ourselves by holding them in.
Inkoseh 33
Maybe OP was just picking a side to lean while farting! Lean the other way next time!
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Comments (4)
RichardPencil 32
And that's why we let 'em rip and don't contort ourselves by holding them in.
Inkoseh 33
Maybe OP was just picking a side to lean while farting! Lean the other way next time!
spinspinsugar 12
One time my husband, who had just turned 32, threw out his back while wiping his ass
E2dav 5
Easy fix - time to hit the gym. You'd be surprised how quickly you can start getting into shape