Today, I gave my sister some Lubriderm for a skin condition we share. While she was applying the lotion I joking said, "Wouldn't it be funny if it made it worse?" Guess who got punched in the face, twice, because it did. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at Bath and Body Works with a friend of mine. She wanted me to smell a particular lotion and when she brought it up to my nose, she squeezed the bottle and lotion went all over my face. Right after, a worker came by and commented how the lotion "got a little too excited". FML
Today, my mom was gifted with a toiletry basket. I grabbed the lotion and used it without asking. When I went out, it began raining hard. I got wet and noticed my skin got very sticky. Turns out the lotion was actually body wash. People were wondering why soap bubbles were coming from my skin. FML
Today, my sister thought it would be funny to spray my face with my new tanning spray, which is only supposed to be used on arms and legs. I woke up and looked in the mirror to see an orange blotchy face staring back at me. My parents can't look at me without laughing. FML
Today, my sister decided to wake me up by pumping handwash into my open mouth. FML
Today, I got a second degree sunburn everywhere above my waist, for which I've been using a medicated lotion. My roommate "pranked" me by switching the lotion with a similarly colored, very caustic acne wash. My chest feels like it's roasting in hell and is oozing pus and oil now. FML
Today, I was standing in the shower drying off when my sister came in the bathroom. She must have thought I was a burglar because she hit the shower curtain and punched me in the face. FML
Today, my sister and I had a fight. In her rage, she threw piles of dirty laundry at me. One of her bloody panties hit me on the face. FML
Today, as I was about to go in the bathroom, a girl walked out, shaking water off her hands. Some of it landed on my face, and I just wiped it off. Then she said to her friend who was waiting for her, "The sink's broken. Can I use your hand sanitizer?" So what landed on my face? FML
Today, my girlfriend helped me apply liquid bandaid over an open wound. Unfortunately, she grabbed the liquid wart remover instead. FML
Today, after pranking my roommate several times by putting lube in his hand sanitizer bottle, he got me back by putting sanitizer in my lube. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
stolencrackers 1
That sucks.. unfortunately the lotion didn't help.. but sheesh.. someone can't take a joke/sarcasm. FYL
chellinha93 0
agree with #6... a little sense of humour wouldn't kill her.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (47)
perdix 31
You should use Lubriderm on the days when she has the "skin condition," and she can use it when it's your day. While it's nice for sisters to share, I'd hate to be there when the handover takes place.
iloveloosy12 0
god of beer you fail epicallt
FlyMeAway 2
As does your spelling.
studentwoes 2
Your sister is a bitch, you were only trying to help. I would've punched her right back
Greeksta23 7
^ Agreed iloveloosy - you kind of deserve it, you were insensitive but your sister just went too far I'd have bitch slapped her back. xD
rx0829 0
Your sister is most definitely a bitch. But for future reference, you should NEVER share medications or anything of the sort with someone, even if they have the same problem as you. It doesn't always work the same for everyone.
Phoenix_GAD 0
you need to read. they shared the skin condition, not the lotion.
hbgoddard 0
That's what he meant... OP: YDI for ending your FML in a question. I'm ******* sick of those.
carljames0603 0
What is with Clay Aiken in place of Chuck Norris jokes popping up? Clay Aiken is a douchebag. Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris. Clay Aiken is like that cuz Chuck Punched his great-great-great-grandfather in the balls, thus he is the end result.
perdix 31
Who knows? Clay Aiken was runner-up on American Idol. An idol is just a statue of a god. Chuck Norris, on the other hand. . .
GodOfBeer 5
Chuck Norris on the other hand is what God aspires to become...
scott_m319 0
The prophecy has been fulfilled.
Shadow_Phantom 26
Wondering if the OP and sibling have eczema. I have that too, and all the lotion does is make it worse.
DeathShad0 1
Kind of a bitch for punching you in the face.
RaeBabe03 0
Hmm... Idk what to say