Today, my best friend told me to face my fear of cows and hop over the fence in with them. This resulted in me being chased by a raging cow, and thrusting myself head first over a fence. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went with my family to visit my aunt, who lives on a farm. My brother told me that cows are ticklish and convinced me to go up and tickle one of the cows. The cow clearly wasn’t a fan, and I ended up being chased right into a lake. FML
Today, I was visiting friends in the country, and the property next to theirs has cows. Bored, I walked over to the fence and looked at a cow, who trundled over to the other side of the fence. I then saw the farmer staring at me and for some reason I said, "Just saying hi to your cow!" FML
Today, my date took me to visit his farm. As we were walking, a wild rabbit darted past me and startled me. I tripped and fell face first into cow dung. FML
Today, my dad tried to help me overcome my intense fear of horses (due to nearly being killed by one as a child) by taking me to a ranch. Within 30 minutes, a horse bit my face. FML
Today, I was supposed to be let the bull out of the trailer and head straight home. Someone didn't latch the gate, so it just walked through between pastures. The bull and a cow went through, a horse broke into the cow lot, and another horse had a meltdown and wiped out in mud after trying to jump the fence. I don't like beef cattle. FML
Today, I was sitting on a fence watching a friend play soccer. He accidentally kicked the ball at my face and made me fall off the fence into mud. I laughed it off and got back on the fence. Two seconds later he did the same exact thing. I fell wrong and slammed my face into the fence. Pain. FML
Today, on a whim, I decided to try parkour. I climbed a chain link fence and fell off, right onto my face. Then the owner of the property shouted at me. FML
Today, I went to my cousin's farm with my family. First I was pooped on by a goose, peed on by a puppy, bit in the face by the mother dog, fell through the floor of the barn loft, and without knowing it was electric, rested my hand on the horse fence. FML
Today, while letting horses out to switch pasture, one ran at me, sending me through the electric fence and into a mud puddle. Wrapped in electric fence, I sat in that electric mud puddle, screaming every time it shocked me. Help arrived, once they'd had a good long laugh. FML
Today, I was at a rodeo warming up while my mom unnecessarily bragged about my training skills to a client. My horse then threw me into a gate at a full gallop, in front of everyone. That was the first time he'd ever misbehaved. FML
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Top comments
CrimsonNightmare 0
We all make moostakes
Keyman1212 14
Boy he must have really milked the situation to convince you that your bovine fear was irrational. He sounds like he must have given you some cheesy advice, to mootivate you over the fence. Unfortunately, you were udderly out of luck when attacked by a cow. I wouldn't call you a cow-ard. Just a pussy. Whoops. That's a cat.
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Comments (174)
annie6948 2
awhhh, poor u,
sirsocal 0
cows?
Microbus_fml 0
Best way to see a cow is 20oz. at a time!
heartgrenade1 5
You deserved it, for being afraid of cows. Pussy.
CoyoteOldOne 17
Well, at least now you have a reason to be afraid of cows, so you can say it is no longer an irrational fear. Are you sure you weren't chased by a bull? In any case, you did face your fear, by confronting it - courage is when you act despite your fear, not a lack of fear. You then followed up by intelligently ran away from a large, angry, stompy animal, once it became clear that it intended to mash you. Also, pro-tip: Unless they are your cattle, you should leave them alone, and not drag them into your business. This goes for other animals too. Tell your amateur psychiatrist friend not to quit their day job.
trueblue170 13
...I'm sorry, I immediately thought of Cars after reading this. X'D
theanimepanda 4
a fear of cows???
writergirl23 19
Cows like to do that, run full tilt towards you and stop at the last second. Op would have been fine.
nachosbabygurl 9
are you still scared of cows
thecreepypotato 0
You actualy managed to make a cow mad? O.o