Today, I was telling my fiancée about my Hashimoto's symptoms when my MIL to-be said, "You must be drinking too much alcohol. My aunt had a goiter and it only swelled when she drank, usually bourbon or beer." She then walked out of the room, perfectly content with her "diagnosis." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my physician, a known drunk himself, told me I was drinking too much and I should quit before my kidneys decide to divorce me and take the house and car with them. FML
Today, my wife told me alcohol gives me "increased confidence without increased ability." FML
Today, I got my medical checkup back. Apparently, I'm diagnosed with a liver condition generally found in alcoholics. I've never drank in my life. FML
Today, the guy I've been seeing decided to "test the theory" that I can't drink alcohol due to a liver condition by mixing some into my drinks. He then complained that my ceaseless vomiting made his bathroom smell bad, and only took me to hospital when I started having a seizure. FML
Today, my sister's husband, who's never even been to college let alone medical school, told me that my cancer is not hereditary, despite a deep family history. He instead swears it's due to my "poor lifestyle and eating habits." Mind you, he's a 300 lbs, fall-down drunk with multiple DUIs. FML
Today, my grandma told everyone at our party to stay away from me, saying, "Ya might catch obesity from her and become fatass porkers too." I complained to my dad, at which point my gran faked being inebriated. My dad rolled his eyes and said, "She's DRUNK, honey. Chill out." FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's mom. She went on about how my girlfriend's dad is a no good drunk, following this statement with spilling her fifth glass of wine. FML
Today, I was feeling sick and ended up throwing up as soon as I got home. My mother's first question was an accusatory, "What have you been drinking?" I was returning from the AA meeting I have been attending for over a month. I go because I'm afraid I'll become an alcoholic like her. FML
Today, my once-alcoholic mom told me that she would sell me for a shot of vodka. FML
Today, my future mother-in-law told me she thought I was severely allergic to cigarette smoke. That hasn't stopped her from chain-smoking around me for the last 3 years. FML
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Top comments
ViviMage 40
Hashimoto's is autoimmune, where the thyroid gland is attacked by the body's immune system. A goiter is when the thyroid can't produce active thyroid hormone, usually due to a hot diet or one sided diet issue, and gets bigger in response. There is a difference! FYL. Btw, I had thyroid cancer 16 years ago. Wanna go out drinking?? J/K
alycion 39
As one autoimmune sufferer to another, you can’t cure stupid. I’ve started keeping the best help advice I’ve gotten from the dr. Google experts. It’s good for a laugh on bad days.
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Comments (4)
ViviMage 40
Hashimoto's is autoimmune, where the thyroid gland is attacked by the body's immune system. A goiter is when the thyroid can't produce active thyroid hormone, usually due to a hot diet or one sided diet issue, and gets bigger in response. There is a difference! FYL. Btw, I had thyroid cancer 16 years ago. Wanna go out drinking?? J/K
Joshawott 21
Thank you for the Medical to English translation! Much appreciated! My Mum is a former nurse, and I often have to remind her that not everyone understands medical terminology...
alycion 39
As one autoimmune sufferer to another, you can’t cure stupid. I’ve started keeping the best help advice I’ve gotten from the dr. Google experts. It’s good for a laugh on bad days.