Today, after being dumped just 48 hours prior, I awoke from a night of passionate lovemaking with my ex. Last night, he came to my house, romanced me, and presented a possible future. This morning, when I got up to use the restroom, my laptop, money, and ex-boyfriend were gone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my now-ex dumped me at a house party, which I then couldn't leave, as all my things were at his house, where I was meant to be staying. FML
Today, I got back from a romantic vacation at a fancy hotel with my boyfriend of 6 months. After a steamy love session, I confessed that I was in love with him. Later, when I got out of the shower, all his stuff was gone and I was stuck with the entire week's hotel cost and no ride home. FML
Today, at four in the morning, I was asleep with my boyfriend beside me. I started yelling at him in my sleep and broke up with him. When I woke up, he was gone. FML
Today, I got dumped during sex. FML
Today, after quite a long work day, I got home to find my house had been broken into. Everything but my sleeping boyfriend was gone. FML
Today, my boyfriend came home from college for the first time in weeks just to visit me. I was so excited that I spent two hours getting ready. Turns out he was only coming back to dump me. Now I'm single and out of foundation. FML
Today, I came back to my boyfriend's house where I've been staying to find all my things thrown outside, ruined, including my entire CD collection, textbooks and clothes cut up. All because I had left my phone there and had got a text from a guy saying, "Hi, how have you been?" FML
Today, I found out that my ex slept with someone during a work trip and came back to break up with me. He spent the whole breakup making me think that the problem in the relationship was me. FML
Today, I was brutally dumped over webcam, by my boyfriend, who was taking a dump with the laptop on his lap. FML
Today, I was awakened in the middle of the night by a frantic banging on my front door. It was a guy whom I'd only been dating a few weeks, with a suitcase. He stated that his wife kicked him out for having an affair, and thought now would be a good time to move in together. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Annie, are you OK? Are you OK, Annie? You've been hit by a Smooth Criminal.
DGross 8
Go to his house tonight... romance him till he falls asleep then grab your stuff back, kick him where it hurt and tell him to go Fu*k himself... problem solved
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Comments (167)
NotMeh 0
lol... I just moderated this fml like an hr ago.
hawkie409 0
Call the cops, and then seduce him once your stuff is back. Then take a match that can't be traced, preferrably one from his house, and burn his stuff, being careful not to burn the house down.
crazyeduardo16 0
#13 I don't get it..
crazyeduardo16 0
oh! I was having a little "slow" moment nevermind. haha, she deserves it .
kyarush 10
the man is genius if you ask me. 1 ex boyfriend 0 gulable girl
perdix 31
The word is spelled "gullible," but it is easy to make that mistake because that word does not appear in the dictionary.
Serec 0
HAR HAR...
daisy1vargas 0
WTF Id report tht to da popos if I were u and yes FYL
Whiskan 0
This is your own fault. ****. Get over him and stop being so vulnerable. He can't take advantage of you if you don't let him.
flurffmeister 0
needs moar lojack
13__Loki__13 1
Whats the big deal? You just got ****** a little harder than you originally thought! Or is the computer still in your ******?
emsun1 0
that's so low