Today, my brother got a job as an Uber driver. Now, whenever I need a ride from him, he insists I pay him money through the app. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, in addition to having to deal with chronic pain that keeps me from driving for more than 10 minutes, I now have to deal with my brother who thinks I'm not paying him enough for taking me to school 2 days a week, when he does the journeys for himself anyway. FML
Today, after I just finished a 16-hour double shift, my brother asked me to ride with him to do an Instacart. While delivering these people’s groceries, his car overheated and oil light came on. He had no money, so I had to fix and pay for the parts. FML
Today, I took a taxi ride with my friends. As we were getting out, I paid the taxi driver. With a grin, he drove away fast. It turns out my friend had already paid. FML
Today, as usual, I work nights and sleep during the day. I found out that my brother uses my car and never puts gas in it when he called me for the first time to actually ask me if he could borrow my car, and also to lend him $20 to put gas in it. FML
Today, while at work at a new job, my brother comes and takes my car. Along with all my money, my phone, and whatever else I had in my purse. His message to me through one of my co-workers was "walk home." FML
Today, a guy who'd never used ride-share before asked for help at the airport. I thought we hadn't figured it out yet, so I canceled mine, which doubled my fare when I ordered it a minute later because we'd actually had figured it out. FML
Today, I volunteered to be my brother's designated driver. I told him throughout the night that I wasn't drinking, but he ended up leaving me at the bar and going to his friend's house in a cab for more drinks, taking my keys along with him. FML
Today, my brother offered me $20 to practice his kissing on me for his date later this evening. FML
Today, my brother finally paid me the $60 he owed me. I later found out that he'd stolen those $60 from my wallet. FML
Today, I returned home from a 2-day trip. Before I left, I told my brother to move my car across the street when the street cleaner passes by. Turns out, he used all my gas and got so wasted he forgot to move my car. I got a big ticket that he said he'd pay for. He's unemployed and lives off me. FML
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Top comments
Sphanz 17
The only reason he wants you to pay through the app is so he can look better as an Über driver. Help your bro out.
mif_fml 27
Kind of a dick move..
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Comments (31)
MisterKnowItAll 15
Well he can do that, technically
kelardy 11
Actually he can't according to Uber's policy as it is against their rules. He's not allowed to tell people to go on the app nor can he actually be sure he would be the one driving his brother because you can not request a driver. My own brother works for them and explained this to my family over a dinner one night.
kingcaper817 14
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Just give him horrible reviews so that no one wants him as a driver
mif_fml 27
Kind of a dick move..
gotbeer 7
you are a living proof as a turd
chrisbeaudoin 26
You are a turd, a stinky fat turd, go sniff a jockstrap you poophead
leogachi 15
@4 What the brother did was a dick move, too. So I think they'd be even.
howard007 18
Not wanting to drive their sibling everywhere is a dick move now??
cxsuzanne 6
39, no but asking your sibling money for it is kinda a dick move. If he has to drive him often I can see why he would ask for money but other than that...
Sphanz 17
The only reason he wants you to pay through the app is so he can look better as an Über driver. Help your bro out.
thebiga 10
Give him shitty reviews though!
soldier084 11
better than walking or talking public transportation.
leogachi 15
@6 Public transportation is cheaper. (And technically, a taxi is public transportation.)
earlytermination 34
Time for you to gain independence.
shadowlurker_j 15
Do you have ways of getting around on your own, OP? I'd assume not, but if you do, now might be the time to start using them.
PossiblyInDanger 24
It'll make him look better on the app. What's the problem?
rileyrae0000 23
The cost can get pretty high for an uber ride. If it's your brother it should be free, or enough to cover the gas. Über charges a lot more
doodlecloud 27
Really depends. If OP often does stuff for his brother and just wants a lift every now and then but he's being an ass then that's annoying. If he always demands that he takes him everywhere and rarely does anything in return then the brother has every right to charge him.
ThatHorse 15
As long as he isn't getting you to pay by *******, right?
rileyrae0000 23
Was this necessary?
ThatHorse 15
Absolutely not. That's why it's called a joke.
rileyrae0000 23
I think jokes are supposed to be funny
leogachi 15
@27 I thought it was funny.
aldoshoes 4
Yeah, I thought it was funny too.
tiptoppc 21
It is, just dark and twisted. Takes certain people without a stick up their ass to appreciate it. I fall into this category. If you have a stick up your ass, this may not be the site for you then.
gotbeer 7
you are a freeloader
ThePandoricaOpen 18
No, that's his brother. Would you make your family pay you to rake them to where they need to go? I didn't think so.
laden_swallow09 35
Sorry, but nepotism isn't one of my character traits. Fork it over, bucko.
rileyrae0000 23
An uber fee is a lot more than just the gas money the ride requires. If OP wanted to pay that much he wouldn't have asked his brother.