Today, I was at a fraternity party, and one of the hosts said over the loudspeaker, "Turn to the person next to you and picture them naked, then drink a beer if the mental image disturbs you." I turned, only to be face-to-face with my ex-boyfriend. He drank two beers. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to a party and saw my current boyfriend making out with my ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, I went to a huge party. My ex boyfriend was there who I still have feelings for, so I decided to make him jealous by making out with the really drunk guy next to me. While we were making out, he threw up in my mouth and all over me. Everybody found it hysterical including my ex. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. I'm nervous around them so he encouraged me to drink so I'd loosen up. I got so drunk I tore up all the things in his old room I thought were from ex-girlfriends and accidentally flashed his dad my crotch. FML
Today, I went out on a date with an ex-boyfriend who I hadn't seen since college. He took me to a bar, where he was oddly quiet, but drank heavily. When the bartender asked us if we were ok, he replied, "This is my ex-girlfriend. Can you believe she used to be skinny?" FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend from two years ago called and asked to come over. Still being in love with him, I agreed to see him but decided I wasn't drunk enough to handle the stress. After a while of drinking, he said that he really missed me and wanted to be with me. My reply consisted of throwing up. FML
Today, I got so drunk I called my ex-boyfriend and confessed my love to him. All in front of my current boyfriend. FML
Today, I was at a bar with my girlfriend, and I noticed an obnoxious guy from college I used to hang out with. I tried to avoid eye contact, but all of a sudden he shouted, "There's the guy who puked his margarita back into the glass!" Everyone stared. Yup, that was me, just last week. FML
Today, while at a party, I ran into the girl I've liked for ages. I was so nervous, but I managed to keep the conversation going for a half hour. After mustering up the courage to ask her out on a date, her drunk, over-protective ex burst in and threw up on my shirt. Good timing, asswipe. FML
Today, I was at a party at my ex's house; he'd invited the whole team. We of course don't talk, but I just figured out he had a girlfriend. He said it right in my face and laughed. FML
Today, for the first time in two years, I met my ex-girlfriend. I was drunk. FML
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Top comments
foulball3 0
what a ********.. slapped him right?
Hoff 0
Laugh. He's bitter.
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Comments (56)
foulball3 0
what a ********.. slapped him right?
Quidikic 9
She should slap his dick, lol.
PinkieKeen 20
she should've drank three beers
cybergirl_fml 0
ouch. ><. & as the #1 said, i seriously hope u slapped him!
SBurrke 11
Y'all really enjoy resorting to Violence in here don't yah. If she slapped me I wouldn't be afraid to slap back.
Hoff 0
Laugh. He's bitter.
ZING_MASTER 0
That's what you get for going to a frat party. And for dating a frat guy. And for thinking there are any redeeming qualities in anything at a frat.
geewhiz 0
i think it would have been worse if it had been a randomer not your ex. you guys have broken up and so you already knew he didnt have feelings for you etc. etc. i would have been more insulted by this if i didn't already know the person disliked me
MissIndependent2_fml 0
^this
Mr_Serious 6
hey #7 just because you had a bad time at some fraternity doesn't mean that every one is the same. If you're a guy don't be so bitter because no fraternity would ever give you a bid, you're obviously a tool... and if you're a chick, don't be so bitter because you have to take the walk of shame every morning, alcohol makes guys do things they would rather not remember the next day...
NotoriousMandog 0
#12, I agree. Now slapping him or taking 5 beers, ok... a little insulting. What you should've done instead is walked over and tapped a keg.
meemz 0
....u must be from GDub.
president_benson 0
awww... he was doing that just to piss you off. now what would really suck is if the guy who did that was someone you liked.
blah_blah_shity 0
lol you drank 3? then threw up? in front of him? LOL he probably got nervous
R2Y2 22
Wtf are you talking about?