Today, I graduated from college with two undergrad degrees in biochem and wildlife biology, with high distinction. My mom told me she had found me a job at a petting zoo. I thought she was joking. She then said sternly, "I want grandkids. At least you will meet girls there." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom came home and told me she was going back to college. She's going to the community college that a lot of the graduates from my school go to. She has biology with my ex. They're lab partners and have to do take home labs together. FML
Today, away at college, I called my grandmother to hear how she was doing after her knee surgery. She ended up talking about Hooters and how I should work there because of my "rare body". When I mentioned I've been studying computer science, earning a 3.8 GPA, she replied, "But you're a girl." FML
Today, was my graduation from a prestigious university. In two days I start working at a hot dog stand. FML
Today, I excitedly told my mom how I got accepted to the master’s program of my dreams. She decided now would be a good time to proudly repeat for the millionth time how she gave up a full ride to the Ivy League to marry my father, and I ought to be a "good woman" and do the same. FML
Today, when my son told me he wanted to work with animals, I thought he meant a vet, turns out his actual career goal was to be the guy who puts the strays to sleep at the animal control centre. He got that job and I’ve never seen him happier. What monster have I raised? FML
Today, I found out that the girl I tutored in high school in basic ENGLISH just received her PhD in Biophysics. I am now the manager of a McDonald's. I was also the Valedictorian of our graduating class. FML
Today, my mom called and told me I got accepted to my first-choice college. I got really excited and asked her to read me the letter. As she started to read it, she said, "Oops... uh, nevermind." FML
Today, after having a long talk with my mother about LGBT rights, she told me that she was totally open. I felt completely relieved, being gay myself. Seconds later, she said, "But not for you. I want you to find me a nice girl that can give me lots of grandkids." FML
Today, after having spent years staying in school, working hard to achieve good grades, and avoiding all the bad kids, my mom accused me of having no direction in life and complained about how I haven't given her a grandchild yet. I'm 19. FML
Today, while at a grocery store, I told my mom I had some good news. She exclaimed, "You finally got a boyfriend?!" No mom, just an A on my math test. FML
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Top comments
emer_helena 0
You will meet girls! All the cool 6 year olds go to the petting zoo :)
Indiana_fml 4
So you are supposed to hook up with single moms so that she can have instant-grandchildren...
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Comments (95)
Luckster 0
I hate parents whom only think "I want grandchildren" once their own children reach adulthood and finally leave college. Gee, thanks Mom. It's not like I want to LIVE before having to take care of a little shit for 20 years. I hope you didn't take the job and told your Mom to suck it. It's your life. You decide what job you want, especially with a college education like yours. And YOU decide if your Mom deserves grandkids!
FoundManyLemons 0
Eh, YDI for refusing any job in this economy.
8_crazychkn_9 0
i agree with #53's suggestion. i would take the job at the petting zoo, its a job for the meantime and not a career. it'd give you some income while you find a better job, which you should have no problem with seeing as you have a biochem degree (im working on mine right now) as far as the social aspect, i don't know how you spent your time in college but im having a blast. i meet new people every weekend. maybe she just doesn't know what you did in school. i don't know if a petting zoo is the best place to meet girls but what the hell.
mouseintern 0
Well, at least you have a job. I graduated with highest honors with a degree in Business Economics, years of internship experience at a huge, well respected company, and I still have at best a few leads on some job opportunities. At least this job will support you until you can find something you really want to do.
Lucy_Face 0
I'm majoring in wildlife bio. i will cry i end up working at a petting zoo.
elloelle 0
ohhhhh mom...the things you may say.
ThatsAli3 0
i love zoos = ) You should go work there= )
Sessee 4
Wtf is with mothers and their wanting grandchildren?
weefoo 0
what kind girls are you supposed to meet at a petting zoo? 6 year olds?
fcuk_fml 0
maybe if you found a job for yourself, she wouldn't have. and plus, at least you have a job. shame on you.