Today, I'm on a medication that really dehydrates my skin. I thought split lips were the worst side effects. Other split orifices make a trip to the toilet a literal pain in the arse. No sign of stopping in the near future. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I have chronic dry mouth due to medication. It makes my breath smell atrocious, so I got some Biotene dry mouth lozenges. I usually have constipation issues. Lately it's been the opposite. So I can either have porta-potty breath or be on the brink of shitting myself. FML
Today, someone held me down and rubbed ChapStick all over my lips. I have a condition which requires medicinal balm, otherwise my lips crack and bleed, and ChapStick makes it worse. I’m still waiting on the balm to arrive. FML
Today, I discovered that of the three medicines I now have to take, all three of them have acne as a side effect. When acne is a side effect, I am 100% guaranteed to get it. FML
Today, I went on a new medicine. One of the listed side-effects was "anal seepage" and I spent the better part of the day laughing with my coworkers about how it's "not a real side-effect". I found out that it really is while stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the way home. FML
Today, I had so much skin peeling off my lips that it got caught in my fork as I was eating. FML
Today, I discovered that just because I got my braces removed does not mean my painful mouth ulcers will stop. I now have them under my tongue. I can't even lick my lips. FML
Today, I have what is probably a cold sore on my upper lip. I also have a mustache, which keeps rubbing against it. Because of this, no matter what I do, it stings. The next few days are fixing to be very, very long and miserable. FML
Today, I woke up bleeding from every orifice in my body. I've got a nose bleed from my medication, my gums bled when I brushed my teeth, I'm on my period, and I have hemorrhoids. FML
Today, I came down with painful sores in my mouth, just after having gotten over a cold. Apparently I'm allergic to the cough drops I've been eating for the past week to make myself feel better. FML
Today, I realized that acne is a major side effect of a medication I'm taking. The medication is to help me with my anxiety. The acne is creating more anxiety. And the more anxious I get, the more meds I need. And the more my face breaks out. FML
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Top comments
moop256 10
Not even a joke try some Vaseline.
upyourzlolz 11
I guess you need that $90 moisturizer.
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Comments (160)
FYLDeep 26
What kind of goofy-ass drug comes with a side effect like that?
upyourzlolz 11
Hopefully not Viagra, because then I'm ******.
FYLDeep 26
Your dick becomes so incredibly hard that it just splits open from too much blood flow?
upyourzlolz 11
Something along those line. Thus, the first male-period occurred. Not even Doc could fix me.
flockz 20
wait, men aren't supposed to get periods?
ladycamo 0
@35, isn't that the point of Viagra???
sneakypeekaboo 8
Accutane.
Tritanx 12
A nodular acne medication called accutane
swinglifeaway123 8
My deepest sympathies :/ That sounds like hell
G0v3nat0r 7
Hmmm, I wonder which set of lips she is referring too... Yes this was a bad joke
s1ckpup 0
and all that happenend... In a split second... Ahaha
kaykay20 0
Try baby oil and unscented hydrating lotion for sever dry skin. Cracked foot cream is good on dry skin anywhere though doesn't smell the best. For that sensitive area petroleum jelly like vaseline works well as a skin protectant.
tennisrapper1 14
Imagining someone taking a shit like that is very uncomforting XD
not_an_indigo 3
Sounds like Accutane! Best thing to do is drink more water, and also include more healthy oils and fats in your diet. A stool softener will make things more comfortable too.
FYLDeep 26
I just googled Accutane and it sounds like some nasty shit. I don't know how bad your acne would have to be to make it worth it to take that drug. Sounds to me that there's always going to be a little bit of an adverse reaction when taking this stuff.
ballerinaaub 17
I hear your not even supposed to eat fatty foods with accutane, my friend took it and the doctor told him no fatty foods at all or else it may not work 100%! But FYL OP.
wittygirl 8
You poor thing.. Have you tried to apply like vasoline to help with the dry skin down there?
kumogata 0
I know that feel bro. Accutane?
cBlackout 13
Time for some chap stick on your asshole.