Today, I bought a brand new huge leather recliner. After laying down and watching football for some time, I sit up and hear a loud shatter. My iPhone was crushed by the mechanics of the chair after it slipped out of my pocket. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after calling the insurance plan for my new iPhone a "huge waste of money", I promptly dropped it in the store while trying to put it into my pocket, cracking the screen. FML
Today, I was lying on my recliner watching TV when I dropped the remote under the footrest. I got down on my hands and knees and pushed the footrest into the chair. The moment I touched the remote, the footrest deployed and hit me square in the face. FML
Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML
Today, I went to sit on a desk chair, which promptly rolled out from under me. This made me fall on my own foot, literally shattering two bones. I just bought a 9-month gym membership and can't use it because I wanted to sit down. FML
Today, I was at a pool party with some friends. They grabbed and lifted me in the air, about to throw me in the pool. My iPhone was in my pocket, so I screamed "MY PHONE!" They paused so I could gently throw it onto a deck chair. It bounced, hit the concrete, and cracked its screen. FML
Today, I bought an otter box. While setting up my iPhone, I dropped it and it is now shattered. FML
Today, I got home after a long day and collapsed onto my bed… forgetting I'd left my laptop open on it. Now I have an expensive, broken pillow. FML
Today, I was finishing up at the gym and packed my bag to come home. I set my phone on top of it for a second as I knelt down to tie my shoes. Less than a minute later, I grabbed my bag to walk out, forgetting that it was on top. It tumbled to the ground and smashed. Guess I need a new phone. FML
Today, I was at a party, and I sat down on a chair. While conversing with friends, I shifted places on the chair, and broke it. Embarrassed, I then stood up and change chairs. After moving to the next chair, I broke that one too. FML
Today, I was watching a movie on my chair. I leaned back on the back of the chair and kept leaning back. Then I slowly fell down with my chair, onto the floor. It made a big noise, but nobody was hurt, it was just really absurd, like I'd watched another episode of Mr. Bean. FML
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Top comments
CallMeHush 1
Damn Iphones are like having a trout in your pocket sometimes.
Remegy 3
God forbid having phones in pockets
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Comments (172)
Starfire22 5
oooo take the rubber chicken, it's much more filling...
Ajjas013 6
Actually, the amount of laughter we all recieve after I smack you upside the head with the rubber chicken would be much more filling. *Swings chicken by side in preparation for attack*
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
(sighs) CMH has completely killed my rage buzz. Rubber chickens are a laughing matter and always seem to remind me of the day my professor stabbed me with a fork and told me to go fork myself with my sister. My sister tasted like a rubber chicken...
CallMeHush 1
And that is something you chew on for a while.
Ajjas013 6
Your short anecdote makes me feel like forming an alliance against Starfire... Or cookie dough ice cream...
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
back to the topic of the FML... um... (stares at the ceiling of the office he's working in for a minute) Damn it! I knew I forgot to change my diaper this morning! (shakes fist of doom towards Starfire22) DAMN YOU AND YOUR EGG SKILLS!
Ajjas013 6
*Flings spinache at ceiling* Starfire... Get in the kitchen and make me a sammich!!!
CallMeHush 1
(spooning suspicious looking gravy onto BSR's plate) Eat up, there's some easy ones out there for you today. (pain behind eye) Mercy and virgin, two words that I don't see together very often. Not since the flood anyway.
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
(stares at CMH with a look of shock) I thought we weren't going to talk about or even mention the Flood?
hobobuster 0
The Flood sounds like something of biblical proportions, meant only for those whom have strength of heart to handle hearing the mention of its name. *has heart attack*