Today, I took my 8 year-old nephew to Laser Tag for his birthday party. I reluctantly was forced into playing one game. Apparently, no one explained the rules to one child, and instead of 'shooting' me with his laser pointer, he kicked me straight in the balls. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML
Today, I was babysitting an eleven year-old boy. He decided we would play with Nerf guns with Velcro tips. I shot him in the crotch accidentally, and the dart stuck to his pants, and he wiggled it for about a full minute before his dad walked in to find us both staring at his son's crotch, giggling. FML
Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML
Today, my 14 year-old son asked to join my buddies and me at the gun range. The second I finished the safety lecture and handed him a pistol, he started twirling it on his finger (thankfully, it was unloaded). I smacked him in the head and took him home. Now he's moping and sulking like a bitch. FML
Today, my nephew kicked me in the balls, again! And he got me fair and square this time. It's the fourth time he's got me in the balls since the pandemic started. I have to put my groin guard from college on and teach him a lesson because he won't listen and he's 12, so he knows what he's doing. FML
Today, my little brother was playing with my cat, getting it to chase a laser pointer. He thought it would be funny to shine the laser pointer over my nuts. FML
Today, I was visiting my 8-year-old nephew. He told me he learned about fire safety, so I asked him what he'd do if there were a fire right now. He pushed me out of the way and I fell, then he ran over me and out the front door, leaving me on the floor in pain. FML
Today, I argued heavily with my dad over being dragged to a family game of lacrosse. All through the game, he kept "accidentally" hurling the ball straight at me on the sideline. After he eventually nailed me straight in the heart, he screamed at me to "get out of the fucking way". FML
Today, I was visiting my 8-year-old nephew, who told me he learned about fire safety today. I asked him what he'd do if there was a fire right now. He pushed me out of the way and I fell over, then he ran over me and out the front door, leaving me on the floor in pain. FML
Today, I went paintballing with my siblings. Once we were done, they realised I hadn't been shot at all. They cornered me in the forest and lit me up. I have welts all over my legs. FML
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Top comments
lainzilla 14
That isn't how you play laser tag?
chasin_butterfli 0
Did you at least get to shoot the little turd?
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Comments (89)
ihavenoname123 0
Was that the FIRST time that's happened?
chasin_butterfli 0
yeah slick, I caught that. lol
sidvoltaire 0
word
MF12 0
haha I do that too :)
Caayouteepie 0
Less qq, more pew pew.
Shystai 0
I would destroy that little brat.
angrytaco26 0
says the guy who's profile pic is probally from a gay **** site, way to be violent
GiddyXD 0
you shoulda screamed out " noob hacker " nah jk jk but fyl man
Person1233 13
and you didn't throw him across the room is because he's a child .... ? Pussy.
CronosDage 0
Aaa-and, not being Laser Tag, but Laser Quest, they have random people and staff which will kick your ass out the door.
lettertjes 0
If you were the adult in charge, wasn't it YOUR job to go over the rules? (or to make sure that they were all there when an amployee explained)
Person1233 13
The people that work at the Laser Tag place are supposed to explain the rules. /rolleyes
lettertjes 0
Well apparently the rules were explained to the other kids, so this one kid just went missing during the rule-explaining and OP didn't notice. That might be even worse.
null_fml 11
#3/9: He was using rhetoric. Such should be obvious when using one's brain. Not that you'd know anything about that, apparently. Oh hey, nice sneaky editing to try and get away without looking like an idiot though. (The part in parentheses in #3 was originally not there).
YeahFMLxX 0
@3,9 stop using a rabbit as your picture you nine year old. It's simply annoying you troll.
Person1233 13
Edit: suppose to be a reply.
bettadenne1 0
hahaha sucks to be u sonn
chasin_butterfli 0
Did you at least get to shoot the little turd?
Carbonchild 0
Hey, close combat. Be happy he didn't bayonet you. Lol
glen12 0
so let me get this straight. u went to laser tag and some noob didn't no the rules so he kicked u in the balls? either yr lieing or u previked him into doing it
Peroxide 3
Just shoot him in the eye with the laser. PEW PEW PEW
FernandoTorres_fml 0
An eye for a ball :O
waffleslol 0
haha
kukitheaf 0
slap him with ur gun
toeknee33 0
that's life