Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came home to find my dad in my room, watching porn on my computer. When I asked him what he was doing, he closed the computer, stood up, stared at me awkwardly and then said, "You should really avoid those sites" and left my room. FML
Today, I was browsing porn in my room, when my dad barged in. I quickly switched to another tab, only to see it was parked on another porn page. I had another browser window open, so I switched to that. More porn. My dad said, "Riiiggghhhttt... You need help, son." FML
Today, my mom kicked my dad out of the house and told him not to come home again. Why? I started watching some porn on my computer, forgetting I was still connected to the bluetooth speakers in the living room. My mom thought it was my dad, and I didn't have the balls to admit the truth. FML
Today, I was woken up by the sound of my dad blasting porn on his computer. FML
Today, I was watching porn when I heard my mom call for me. I closed my laptop right as she walked in my room. The sound, however, kept going. FML
Today, my dad came into my room, looked at my laptop, and said he could hear the porn I was watching all the way from his room. I wasn't watching porn. We soon realised it was actually coming from his mobile phone. FML
Today, I came home, turned on my laptop, and turned the TV on mute so I could check my email. My mom came home an hour later, took a look at me on the couch, then the TV, and asked what on earth I was watching. I looked up from my laptop and realized it was porn. FML
Today, whilst my parents and I were out, my older brother thought it would be funny to play porn on my computer. At full volume. With my window wide open. Now my next-door neighbors tell their kids I'm a spawn of Satan, and the weird guy from across the street winks at me. FML
Today, I was watching porn and found my mom on a webcam. When I told her that I saw her, she just took away my computer and told me to get off porn. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me jacking off. He swore and told me to lock my door next time. Later on I heard him snickering and telling my mom that I "jack off real weird." FML
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Top comments
SDee1234 11
Thats almost scary lol. He's spying on you:-P
Cortezthe1st 23
Maybe he noticed that everything was closed, so he assumed you were doing the nasty.
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Comments (148)
supersimonic 2
Your dad probably has CIA spy training.
TheBookWyrm 18
He must have accidentally connected his computer to a Bluetooth speaker in another part of his house.
Merylwen 24
Yeah, poor you. It's so horrible that your father wants to educate you correctly and put some morals in your head.
notsmalltown 8
Next time, remember that even fathers are capable of using Wireshark, that is, by running the capture and just scanning the lines for **** website names without understanding anything about the reassembled PDUs that bring you your pleasure.
dave20012 15
Just tell him it's all part if life and don't act like you didn't do it.
IceWrath 22
That's why you do that shit when everyone's asleep. I've resorted to going under my covers and using my iPad because I'm getting so paranoid.
kerouacdesbois 7
He probaly was monitoring the wifi router's history
Aero_x 21
Use your phone :)
Shopduster 9
I gotta know... What kind of **** where you looking at? Your dad does it too op..
mkayden 23
For all we know OP could have been making noises, so maybe the dad heard that..