Today, it's been over three months since my housemates ended their one month long relationship. He's still creepily obsessed with her. He picked the bathroom lock when I was in the shower and tried to get in, and then called me a "fucking c*nt" when he realised it was me in there, not her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it's been two weeks since one of my roommates moved out. Despite me telling the postal service he no longer lives here, they're still knocking on my door almost every day with urgent letters addressed to him. I have no idea where he lives now, and am wondering what the fuck he was up to here. FML
Today, it's been about two months since I made my husband sleep in the spare room after an argument. I invited him back to our room after two nights but he refused. Since then he’s moved a TV, Xbox, fridge and new armchair into the spare room, and put a lock on the door only he has a key for. I’ve barely seen him. FML
Today, I found out why my boyfriend of over a year is so obsessed with cleaning his entire place before I come over. He's been hiding the ex-girlfriend who never moved out. FML
Today, I went on a date with a really cute guy. Things were going great, so we went to his place. While he was in the bathroom, I absentmindedly looked around his apartment. Unfortunately, his living room cupboard was half open, and I saw a shrine of pictures of me. Apparently, he's been stalking me for months. FML
Today, my three housemates got into a huge fight and ended up declaring their undying hatred for each other. They now refuse to talk to each other, and I've become their go-between. Yesterday, we signed the lease for another year in the house together. FML
Today, my roommate's boyfriend professed his love to me. I kicked him out, and he stood outside the door calling my name until he saw my roommate coming down the hall. They both came in and he acted like nothing happened. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my psycho ex trying to break down my apartment door. FML
Today, I found out that I bought a house next door to crazy people. She asked me if I would mind not showering when her husband is at home, because he can hear me and knowing I’m naked on the other side of the wall turns him on, which is a nuisance for her. He’s unemployed. He’s always at home, the creep. FML
Today, I was chilling at home when my roomie cruised in with a baddie on his arm. She turned out to be a total ho and started trying to get in my pants while he was sitting RIGHT THERE. I did everything I could to shake her off and in the end I just asked her to leave. Fuck, I feel bad for him. FML
Today, I found out that my new roommate got kicked out of his old house because he pulled a gun on his old roommates and threatened them. The reason? They nagged him about dishes he left in the sink. Well, only 10 months left on the lease. FML
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Top comments
datoismyname 22
I think it's time for you to move.
Zebediabolical 45
Call the police. Nothing good is going to come out of letting this slide.
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Comments (142)
Thatsjank 5
lol
xkncas 8
Wow...what a creep! You should tell her what he did, just so she knows he is doing this kind of crap... She and you may want to consider him moving out and getting a restraining order.
invisibleFlower 10
That's so creepy!! >,
bdog11 6
I saw This on ifunny
AdoptedSoul 6
lol...at least he had the consideration of picking the lock not just breaking down the damn door...maybe next time you won't be so lucky...or perhaps your roommate...maybe time to take action before things become really serious
BellaBelle_fml 23
A broken door is hardly at the top of their list of concerns at this point.
lindyloohoo 5
Oh that is dangerously creepy... You and the housemate need to take legal and safety action now! . Call the police and get him the heck out.. ASAP!. Also... Get a few strong men to stay at your house so that you two are not alone with him for another minute!
icepick23 12
Are you not hot enough that he would also want to see you in the shower?
AlexiAwesome 10
Maybe it's time to kick a certain someone out???
Ms_ValS 27
I wouldn't recommend trying to kick a clearly deranged person out. He might pick the lock at night and murder his former roommates. It's better for them to leave.
Original_Outcast 23
Run forest run!
robotiick7 23
One restraining order coming up!