Today, my grandpa, a married high school teacher, got arrested for having an inappropriate relationship with a female student. Hearing the news, I called my grandma crying. Not only is he most likely going to jail, but in seven months I will have a new aunt who is eighteen years younger than me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my aunt came into the world. My 67 year-old grandfather married a 24 year-old woman who just gave birth to my new aunt, who is 18 years younger than me. FML
Today, I came home to find my dad crying. Turns out my parents are getting divorced because my mom had an affair. With a teacher at my school. A female teacher. And the school isn't going to fire her because she's a good teacher. Every day at school I'm going to have to see her. FML
Today, my grandma got a new boyfriend. She dumped the old one because "His wife was taking too long to die." FML
Today, I realized the guy I've been hooking up with has a daughter who is a year younger than me. As if that wasn't bad enough, I also found out she had a child of her own. I've been hooking up with a grandpa. FML
Today, I got a phone call letting me know my grandmother was arrested for trying to light my grandpa on fire. She's now in jail, asking for bail money. FML
Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was the police station informing me that my elderly grandmother has been arrested for indecent exposure. FML
Today, my grandma moved in with us. Along with her 36-year-old boyfriend that none of us knew about. FML
Today, my 70-year-old grandmother held a celebration over officially having divorced my grandfather. FML
Today, a parent came into my class and told one of my 6 year-old students that their grandma died. Then the parent left. The kid started crying from the news, which then got all the other students crying. I spent the rest of the day comforting a class of kids crying over someone else's grandma. FML
Today, no one warned me that my grandfather was slipping into dementia. I proudly brought my new baby to meet him, only for him to burst into hysterical tears that I was a teenage whore, who’s now brought shame to the family. I'm 30 and married, but he still tried to hit me with his cane. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
I got it. You are going to be 18 when grandpa's love child, your aunt will be born. Grandpa's going to jail, so the baby mama is underage. Yeah, having an aunt that is younger than you is odd, but what is really ****** up is that you are older than your "new" grandma, or your new grandma is your grandpa's prison bitch. He's got more options than you do ;)
doink 0
The "aunt" is the baby.
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Comments (94)
cwl727 33
You're crying. How do you think your grandmother feels.
kevinwm0 15
Actually to be accurate, that'll be your second cousin, once removed. And your grandma will be younger than you. Hey - here's something not everyone gets to do ... you can go clubbing with your Grandma!
fantasyworld 39
That is so messed up.
thatcoolguy123 14
WTF... gross...