Today, my mom called asking for advice on how to flirt with her personal trainer. I thought she was joking and asked her what Dad would think. Turns out they're getting divorced. They decided this three weeks ago. No one told me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I texted my mom asking how she was doing. Apparently she's great, and on her honeymoon. I didn't know she was getting married, or that my parents had just gotten divorced. FML
Today, I found out that my mom and dad got a divorce. They didn't tell me, they just changed their relationship status on Facebook. FML
Today, I came home to find my dad crying. Turns out my parents are getting divorced because my mom had an affair. With a teacher at my school. A female teacher. And the school isn't going to fire her because she's a good teacher. Every day at school I'm going to have to see her. FML
Today, my mom let it slip that she was divorcing my dad. After making me promise to keep it from him and my little sisters, she had me help her with her plans to renovate the house. She intends to kick him out once it's done. FML
Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML
Today, I checked my mom's email to track a package I'm waiting to receive. Instead, I found out my mom canceled the order, and that my parents are getting a divorce and have been fighting via email for weeks. FML
Today, I found out my newly-divorced father is now going to marry my girlfriend's mother. Tough situation here. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed. I was about to call my parents and tell them we're getting married, but they called me first to announce they're getting a divorce. FML
Today, I went into my Moms room to look for a t-shirt. I went into her drawer and behind all of her clothes was a cell phone. Not only did I not find the t-shirt, I also found out my Mom is cheating on my Dad with someone from work and now I have to pretend like I don't know. I work there too. FML
Today, I found out my dad is dating my dead mom's best friend. FML
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Top comments
Hermyoni 0
Wow your mother doesn't wait long not even divorced yet and looking for action. FYL OP how inappropriate for your mother to break the news that way.
Starfire22 5
Well, that's one way of finding out about a divorce...
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Comments (65)
JD_88 0
ooh unlucky. That sucks!!!
Epicfailz01 0
well did you give her advice?
canesul 0
my parents are divorced. it isn't that bad
mrteacup 0
who's to say the personal trainer got her to divorce and now they're dating?
Mrjosephramon 0
that sucks bad
WreckerGirl 4
Mine are too. It's really bad. FYL.
brianred5 0
fyl
Horney4her69 0
three weeks isn't much time to be ready to move on.
xocourtxo 0
mine too
do20ss 4
#30 y would she need help flirting if the trainer got them to get divorced? she was overweight and her soon to be ex hubby dumped her fatass...then she joined a gym and now three weeks n she thinks that since she lost a lil weight(4lbs) she thinks she's 'got it back' and wants to get her lil coochie wet with the trainer, IVE SEEN IT A HUNDRED TIMES
joshy_boy 0
parents being divorced are the worse :( my dad left when i was 2 n i love him and hate him at the same time
mmhmm138 0
But shes gonna have to deal with the fact that they divorced cuz of her and that shes adopted and that they never really loved her. You know, no offense.
PrimeStarscream 30
Same here.
MadaZer0 8
Hm... So what if you father is divorcing you mom because she's fat! At least she's looking for personal trainers to ride her giant gaping ******~ But seriously dude... I think people can fit inside there. Your dad is missing out on the greatness known as huge cooch.
Hanban 0
I think there's a surgery called Vaginal Restoration where they stitch up the hole to tighten it and thus feel more sexual pleasure. But then again, these surgeries rarely happen on my nationality. :P
lickmyjock 0
yep, I love the Asian grip. that's why I'm married to an Asian woman. the only other person I had sex with was Asian too. I'm glad I upgraded from that last one, she was Korean. ick. :-P
Hanban 0
So what is your wife's nationality then? (pleasedon'tsayshecameoutfromabridemailbox)...
lickmyjock 0
Chinese. lol and no, but I wish, then I wouldn't be able to take orders from her.
Hanban 0
I don't know why I am not offended, but yes, Asian women do boss men around more than their Caucasian counterparts.
lickmyjock 0
ha sometimes. it's ok though I like it that way on occasion. yeah I'm one of those kinda guys.
lickmyjock 0
What can I say. Nothing turns me on faster than a woman taking charge. I usually don't object to a little smacking me around either.
heeheehoo 0
woohoo I'm chinese!
dj_bassflexx 0
I once ordered a mail bride from the Philippines. I ****** her for a month till her pussy became as wide as a manhole, then I dumped her and went back home.
Hanban 0
@45, Ooh, nasty. This is the reason why we have LOADS of support groups here. The things Filipinas do for money...
FernandoTorres_fml 0
That was her way of breaking it lightly to you. Would you rather, one day you walk in the house to see a group of forensics in a crime scene and your mum in the cornor crying with a bloody knife in her hand, saying "I didn't do it"? huh..HUH?
astro2 0
fernando is obviously retarted. My advice is move to another country and wipe those people u call parents out of your life. They'll make you pick sides or worse, watch one or BOTH of your close loving parents that raised you as a toddler, that fed and clothed you, that bathed and loved you... suck face with their "dates". (i.e strangers) i say just leave them ruin their lives and leave, they obviously dont care about u and only care about themselves.
FernandoTorres_fml 0
Obviously.
lickmyjock 0
Or she could of walked in on some strange man that's not daddy t bagging mommy.
Hanban 0
Nice leads. Now, if only the OP decided to become an independent person overnight and surmise that she does not need parents, let me know. My sofa's open.
lickmyjock 0
You mean, your BED is open... right?
ImaginaryFoe 1
Astro sounds a little bitter... I've never been through a family divorce but I imagine it sucks at any age. It's not about you though, it's about them. And since you're old enough to apparently live away from home, you can handle this. FYL though
Hanban 0
Hey now, don't be like that. I don't take advantage of people... :p
weedow2 0
lmaoooo!!!!!
lickmyjock 0
sure ya don't.
MermaidSongXOXO 6
They don't love you. Be careful before you get beaten like a red-headed stepchild.
null_fml 11
*waiting for the inevitable jab at snickerdoodles from somebody who's never even posted before*
FernandoTorres_fml 0
The anticipation is killing me... ¬.¬
rwac07 0
leave torres alone he is a gun!
Starfire22 5
Well, that's one way of finding out about a divorce...
Hermyoni 0
Wow your mother doesn't wait long not even divorced yet and looking for action. FYL OP how inappropriate for your mother to break the news that way.
CallMeHush 1
If they got to the point of divorce mommy has been waiting for a little action for a while.
Comatose27 0
Yeah, well at least your parent's didn't divorce when you were 2 and for 17 years, you've been thinking your dad was your uncle. FML.
littlexlion 4
Way to be play the, "I've had it worse" game :P
null_fml 11
"Are you one of those guys that has to always one-up everybody else's story?" "Naww... I knew a guy who was WAY worse at that than me..."
friedpwnadge 25
Oh, poor you. You were too young to fully understand the pain of what your parents did. This person has obviously had both of them very long and developed a bond. Now she'll have to choose after finding out in a painful way. Self-pitying attention-seeking wanking prick.
klgastgeb 0
hahaha ouchhh girl, ouch
jsrussell8 0
just give her some tips. mom's need to get nailed too. and apparently your dad wasn't doing something right.