Today, it was raining. I was out walking with my girlfriend, and decided it would be cute if we did a bit of dancing in the rain. As I was swinging her around, I swung her head against a lamp post. She broke up with me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while I was on a walk, I saw my boyfriend; since it was raining, I thought it would be romantic to run up to him and kiss him. I ended up breaking his arm because I knocked him over. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend to prom. Instead of saying yes, she broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were at the river. She threw mud on me, so I playfully threw some on her, and we got into a mud fight. Apparently, she took the "fight" seriously, because I'm now single. FML
Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend with a serenade. After I finished, she told me she'd come over to tell me she'd found someone else and wanted to break up. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML
Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I crossed the street without holding her hand. FML
Today, I saw my crush walking on the other side of the street. She hadn't noticed me, so when she did I nonchalantly looked over and casually waved to look cool. I then walked right into a lamp post. FML
Today, there was a huge storm. There were no buses, so I walked for an hour to see my boyfriend of two years, who (usually rather the unemotionally type) had called me, crying. When I got there soaking wet, he told me that he doesn't love me anymore, and it makes him sad. I had to walk back. FML
Today, I was about to kiss my girlfriend right as the clock struck midnight for New Year's. She put her hand in front of my mouth, and broke up with me. FML
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Top comments
_Noon_ 0
That can't be the only reason why she broke up with you, right?
blastvortex 4
Oops. *bonk* You should've just had a V8. On the plus side, if she can't forgive you for just an accident (if that's all it was), you're probably better off without her.
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Comments (112)
FlaminYawn 0
"cute if we bit of dancing in the rain"?? How come no one has pointed out how badly he ****** up this sentence? You sound like an annoying idiot, really. I don't blame her.
lisaloise 3
the OP is a girl XD woot woot
deathmajestic 0
your a girl rite
8trickster8 0
LEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBIIIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
allmidnighteyes 11
*high five* LOOOVE Chuck Palahniuk and Fight Club :D And especially you for being one of the few people on FML cool enough to get these references :]
allmidnighteyes 11
No D: I haven't managed to get my hands on a tangible copy yet =/
allmidnighteyes 11
Why thank you :] Oh my, that definitely would be a lovely idea for a book club :D
zehr0 0
ehh you didn't need the bitch, anyway.
IllegalLight 0
Aw. It WAS an accident, but YOU should really know what you're doing if you're going to pull a stunt like that o__o. Seriously.
seekasmile 0
Its called hand-eye coordination. Ever heard of it? I heard its quite useful. Idiot.
YummyumCum 0
awww wtf u just had to **** it all up? and **** her too for being a bitch..