kenjenkei

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Offline (the 06/23/2016 at 6:40am)

kenjenkei

34Fucked!

kenjenkeikenjenkei
  • Town/Country : Canberra, Australia
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 July 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3903
  • Number of comments : 59
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About kenjenkei : Eh.

kenjenkei's page activity

Visits<b>AudiLover21</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 6:55pm<b>jackthemac</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 10:56pm<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 4:56am<b>karla_darla</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 5:50pm<b>itprosam</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 5:36am<b>DrowningLessons</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 2:10pm<b>aha_awkward_</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 3:03pm<b>mehibud</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 9:48pm<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 10:50pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 9:09am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 5:03am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 11:04am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 5:58pm<b>Whiplash169</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 7:51am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 11:26pm<b>Mons</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 1:21pm<b>SkullHQ</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 2:20am<b>thomas5915</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 10:07pm

Fucked!<b>DrowningLessons</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 8:10pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 9:45am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 7:16pm<b>thomas5915</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 4:07am<b>mehibud</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 12:02am<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 12:36am<b>nash1991</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 7:03pm<b>TheBroCodeBros</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 5:22pm<b>donaldthegrump</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 12:42am<b>sandormatyi</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 12:08pm<b>GrinchFu1</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 1:54am<b>jacky75</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 2:57am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 5:35am<b>jmcgee17</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 2:51am<b>DougK76</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 3:57pm<b>The_Avatar</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 4:46pm<b>sam9697</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 1:34pm<b>jrmertz00</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 1:20pm

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kenjenkei's favorite FMLs

Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML

by Rhine / 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm / Barbados (Saint Michael) / Love

Today, I was sitting cross-legged, idly jerkin' the gherkin. I guess I got slightly carried away, because I zoned out, forgot where I was aiming, and came all over the side of my face, up my nose and into my eye. FML

by SamWGovan / 12/09/2012 at 11:57am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my friend showed me a video of me in a nightclub. I was holding two Skittles vodka shots and shouting, "Red and green, merry Kwanzaa!" The shots were yellow and purple. I can't remember that night at all. FML

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML

by shit.... / 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm / Malaysia (Selangor) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered "cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML

by Anonymous / 11/03/2012 at 2:02pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Intimacy

Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML

by Anonymous / 10/10/2012 at 5:48pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Intimacy

Today, while at the gym, a very large man walked over to me and said, "I like wearing all orange to the gym." Not wanting to be rude, I asked why. He looks me up and down and said, "It reminds me of prison." I think I'm going to be jumped. FML

by dontrapeme / 09/26/2012 at 6:30am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband revealed that he found me drunk and shoe-less in a shrub in our front garden last night, sending dirty texts to my new employee. I've recently had my meds switched and apparently can't drink now. My husband's pissed, my shoes are gone, and I can't look the new guy in the face. FML

Today, my boyfriend invited me over to "play with his lizard." After excitedly rushing across town, I realized this wasn't a euphemism, he actually bought an Iguana. FML

by Iguana / 09/11/2012 at 10:35pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Intimacy

Today, my dog was diagnosed with depression. I got him to help with my depression. I guess we can just be miserable together. FML

by alix / 08/24/2012 at 11:45am / United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire) / Animals

Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML

by thekriss / 08/23/2012 at 4:28pm / Love

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend opened my refrigerator and began her standard moan: "You're a pig, you never clean up. Look at that egg, it makes me want to throw up, it's gone black, it’s covered in fuzz, IT'S GOT HAIR ON IT!" I got up to check it out. It was a Kiwi fruit. FML

by opinaise / 08/02/2012 at 9:00am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Love

Today, I woke up to find my cat has gone into heat. Her favorite thing to do right now is sticking her ass in my face and howling like a Nazgûl. FML

by soph511 / 07/30/2012 at 2:05pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Animals

Today, I was in line at the pharmacy when the man in front of me asked if I wanted to see a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. Before I had time to answer, he showed me a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. FML

by Uncircumcised Penis / 07/24/2012 at 5:51am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous