iAlissa

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Offline (the 05/27/2016 at 4:04am)

iAlissa

685Fucked!

iAlissaiAlissa
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 11 August 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10340
  • Number of comments : 749
  • Number of FMLs : 2 confirmed out of 14 posted

About iAlissa : I like sushi, dogs and milkshakes.

iAlissa's page activity

Visits<b>PercyD1456</b> - 4 hours ago<b>Thomassssssssss</b> - 6 hours ago<b>laynethefirst</b> - yesterday at 6:05pm<b>mrchachie</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 3:22pm<b>tismael</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 2:42pm<b>robsmit98</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 10:01pm<b>massie87</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 7:31pm<b>hasanjk</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 2:52pm<b>tyler530</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 11:57pm<b>aelabed</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 11:42pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 11:25pm<b>tiwan</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 10:41pm<b>gjuan93</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 4:21pm<b>mld4657</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 4:19pm<b>lissabobissa</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 3:17am<b>TheHinduHomie</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 9:35pm<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 10:06am<b>MindGames</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 8:30am

Fucked!<b>hasanjk</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 8:52pm<b>tiwan</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 4:24am<b>TheHinduHomie</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 3:35am<b>gjuan93</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 5:12pm<b>tyler530</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 4:09am<b>kporter26</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 9:42pm<b>mld4657</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 7:29pm<b>MindGames</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 3:59pm<b>mathsfreak</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 2:36pm<b>mrlucky22</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 5:56pm<b>aelabed</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 8:22am<b>massie87</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 1:48am<b>mjd13666</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 12:46pm<b>DeadxManxWalking</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 5:59am<b>JadeOmega</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 6:47pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 9:48pm<b>donaldthegrump</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 9:47pm<b>Ultimate_Batman</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 12:11am

iAlissa's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

See all of iAlissa's badges

iAlissa's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized that what I thought for years was my country's National Anthem, is actually the theme song of a TV show. FML

by :| / 09/12/2013 at 6:27pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, at Walmart, a woman kept screaming at her husband for the most ridiculous reasons. My friend snickered that she must be on her period, prompting her to whirl around, storm over, and slap the hell out of me, thinking I was the one who said it. FML

by what's a rimjob between friends? / 09/06/2013 at 5:42pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, my girlfriend and I started fighting. Instead of arguing for herself, she decided to set her puppy on me. Only "Puppy" is the name of her fully-grown police-trained German Shepherd. FML

by mykhael / 08/21/2013 at 2:58pm / United States (Louisiana) / Animals

Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML

by frustrated / 08/17/2013 at 6:56pm / Ireland (Kerry) / Intimacy

Today, my 12-year-old son was shot in the foot. After hours of not talking, including to the police, he finally told us that his friend accidentally shot him with his dad's gun, and that he didn't want to say anything because he didn't want to "lose any street cred by snitching." FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2013 at 12:26am / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, I went to my car to get a few things, when I discovered it had been broken into. Nothing of value was taken. My window was busted in just for a pack of cigarettes, a lighter, and my car ash tray. FML

by amayasoma / 08/12/2013 at 2:54pm / United States (Louisiana) / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend discovered subliminal messaging. She thought that whispering "you want to shave your beard" under her breath while I'm not looking at her, then denying ever saying it, would eventually make me shave my alleged upper-lip hair FML

by -__- / 08/11/2013 at 12:26pm / Greece (Attiki) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML

by fired / 08/09/2013 at 6:17pm / Work

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2013 at 4:03am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that my anger problems have gotten out of hand, when I shouted "Fuck you!" at my toaster. My mood swings and loneliness have also reached a new high, evidently, as my next actions were to apologize to the appliance and then continue talking to it. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2013 at 2:19am / United States / Health

Today, my daughter's biggest aspiration is to create a time machine for the sole purpose of going to the '70s to see the Ramones in concert. FML

by Anonymous / 07/29/2013 at 9:32pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. When I didn't get off right away, he asked what he was doing wrong. I told him he was doing fine, but instead of focusing only on my vagina, he might want to pay attention to my clitoris as well. His response? "What's a clitoris?" FML

by Anonymous / 07/29/2013 at 3:54am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I were going at it doggy style, really fast, when she started laughing. I asked her what was so amusing and she giggled, "I can't feel anything in there." FML

by Anonymous / 07/28/2013 at 8:46pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was in a training about the newest changes in CPR. The trainer was discussing chest compression techniques and said she prefers "good, fast, hard pumping." I was the only one who snickered out loud, drawing several annoyed looks from the other trainees. I'm a 45-year-old doctor. FML

by Anonymous / 07/25/2013 at 11:15pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, my girlfriend guilted me into roleplaying as Justin Bieber before and during sex. I now feel physically ill. FML

by Anonymous / 07/17/2013 at 4:27pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy