FucYoCouch

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Offline (the 02/23/2014 at 5:10pm)

FucYoCouch

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 18 November 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 705
  • Number of comments : 85
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About FucYoCouch : I am eighteen years old. I moved to the U.S when I turned twenty and recently got engaged when I turned fifteen. I've played guitar, Piano, and drums since I was eight and I plan to travel the world at twelve years old. Oh yeah, and I became a teacher at twenty three years old c: How old am I? The world may never know ;D

FucYoCouch's page activity

Visits<b>bolee997</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 6:02pm<b>blueyekai</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 7:53pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 5:47pm<b>panromantic</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 10:45am<b>_minifty</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 10:39pm<b>StrangeNigga</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 12:27am<b>Sexomancer</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 12:29am<b>housefromthemau5</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 12:06pm<b>j_mitchell25</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 2:39pm<b>bazinga420</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 5:38pm<b>theblockdude</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 3:11am<b>cutiesoprano22</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 8:18am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 1:30am<b>Adeptasaurus</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 12:17am<b>krupa1017</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 12:01pm<b>bassguitar98</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 4:11am<b>salamander461</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 9:12am<b>CloudBustah</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 7:14pm

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FucYoCouch's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a new dentist. You know how most dentists play soft, relaxing music? Well this guy seems to like rap a lot, and it's kinda hard getting your teeth cleaned to the sound of bullets going off. FML

by randomusername99 / 05/05/2014 at 5:51pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I met up with my group for class. We were doing some final checks on the project we've been working on all semester, when I realized something about one guy's work seemed off. I googled it and found out it's almost completely plagiarized. It's all due in the morning. FML

by Anonymous / 05/04/2014 at 2:57pm / United States / Work

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and he was moaning a lot. My ego was quickly crushed, though, when I found out they were moans of pain due to a foot cramp. We had to stop so I could rub his foot better. FML

by only my life / 04/22/2014 at 6:21pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy

Today, at my wedding, my husband stood up to give a speech. It started out beautiful, until he told everyone how he started to fall in love with me after I blew him on our first date. FML

by Sue Ellen / 04/21/2014 at 11:43am / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, the guy I live with demanded that I get a job or start paying rent. It'd be perfectly reasonable, if he wasn't my husband, and if I hadn't just given birth to our first child. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2014 at 7:49pm / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Kids

Today, I'm in the process of adopting a child. When I called my mom to tell her the news, she just said, "Oh honey, don't adopt, it's the worst decision you'll ever make." I'm adopted. FML

by babylove / 04/11/2014 at 5:58pm / South Africa / Kids

Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML

by Cuntlette / 04/11/2014 at 12:38pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML

by Cuntlette / 04/11/2014 at 12:38pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my three closest online friends are the same person: my obsessive ex. I met all three before he and I even started dating. FML

by Anonymous / 04/06/2014 at 2:09pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I called my mom to ask for some help with my dishwasher. Somehow, the call got turned into a video call. I was wearing a bathrobe, and she was naked in her bathroom. Most awkward call ever. FML

by FaceTime issues / 04/06/2014 at 2:57am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of pee all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML

by Anonymous / 04/05/2014 at 7:16pm / United States (Iowa) / Work

Today, my girlfriend and I were snuggling and we placed our hands together, palm to palm. I can bend the tips of my fingers over hers, which apparently surprised her because she commented, "Huh, so big hands AREN'T related to penis size." FML

by Anonymous / 04/01/2014 at 2:06am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, my dad got me one of those word locks for my gym locker, for which the password had to be a four-letter word instead of numbers. My dad chose the combo for me. It was "diet". FML

by anon / 03/31/2014 at 6:10pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met online. Not only was he boring, he twice excused himself to go to the bathroom and both times he came back smelling of weed. FML

by Jaime / 03/31/2014 at 6:05pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, while on patrol with my partner, we came across a guy getting a beat-down on the sidewalk. After restraining the attacker, we helped the victim to his feet, only for him to spit at us and call us "goddamn pigs". You're welcome, sir. FML

by dunno why we bother / 03/31/2014 at 4:07pm / United States (Florida) / Work