Nearly FMLs

By Jeremy - 16/07/2016 23:28 - Colombia - Bogot?

Today, I was bullied by some white kids at my school because I am "black”. Today was also the day I was bullied by some black kids at my neighborhood because I am an albino. It seems I don’t belong anywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 719

You deserved it 40

By Anonymous - 16/07/2016 22:17 - United States - Schnecksville

Today, I found out my girlfriend of 4 years has wanted to break up with me for 3, but she didn't tell me until now because she "didn't want to hurt my feelings". FML

I agree, your life sucks 578

You deserved it 43

By C8H18 - 16/07/2016 22:14 - United States - Los Angeles

Today a man wearing a veteran hat cursed at and insulted me relentlessly because I'm a girl with short hair. I cut my hair because the bun style I was required to wear my hair in interfered with my combat gear. I'm a Marine. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 701

You deserved it 39

By Anonymous - 16/07/2016 21:26 - Canada - Calgary

Today, despite having a cold, I decided to surprise my husband by baking a batch of brownies. I was ready to stick the pan in the oven, when I smelled something burning. My husband forgot to tell me he was using the oven to dry tools. Some of the plastic components melted and dripped all over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 497

You deserved it 53

By Anonymous - 16/07/2016 20:20 - United States - Xenia

Today, instead of taking a nap, my son took a huge shit on the carpet in his room and coveted it up with a pile of stuffed animals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 382

You deserved it 30

By Not My Fault - 16/07/2016 20:02 - United States - Toledo

Today, since I wore a bikini to a pool party my boyfriend's best friend took that as "permission" to grab my butt several times. My boyfriend cut ties with him. Butt grabber then called and blamed me for the end of their friendship and so did his girlfriend who happens to be my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377

You deserved it 29

By Ehlers-Danlos Diva - 16/07/2016 19:50 - United Kingdom - Harrow

Today, I fell over in my hallway. Not a huge problem in itself, but I fell into the button that powers open my front door. I greeted my neighbours while lying on the floor only wearing panties. FML

I agree, your life sucks 265

You deserved it 25

By sansan3 - 16/07/2016 18:20

Today, I saw the girl I hooked up with a few weeks ago at the family reunion . FML

I agree, your life sucks 358

You deserved it 34

By Inphalluswetrust - 16/07/2016 18:15 - United States - Dallas

Today, I was at a party when I got a raging boner for no reason. I turned around to adjust myself and came face-to-face with my ex gf. Now she wants to get back together because she thought I got hard thinking abut her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 277

You deserved it 26

By Georgiegirl999 - 16/07/2016 18:11 - United Kingdom - Christchurch

Today, I finally got my mum to agree to get a puppy. After driving for two hours to the place the person told us he had sold the one we wanted in the morning and decided not to tell us. She now doesn't want to get one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 244

You deserved it 20

By Anonymous - 16/07/2016 11:36 - Canada - Surrey

Today, I have a job interview. Today is also the day some asshole started yelling outside my apartment complex at an ungodly hour in the morning until he was arrested. I can't fall asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 83

By DrHeartSurgeon - 16/07/2016 06:56

Today, I was de stressing by making a habitat for a caterpillar. I have had a terrible week and was so depressed that by the time I saw the little guy dead, drowned in the water, I was actually crying. I am so depressed, I am currently in tears over the death of a caterpillar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 462

You deserved it 48

By anon - 16/07/2016 02:51 - United States - Granbury

Today, and like every other day, my sister in law rubbed her perfect life in my face, complaining that it's not good enough. All the while, my husband and I are living with his parent, paycheck to paycheck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 33

By Becky - 16/07/2016 01:55 - Canada - Welland

Today, I was spending time with my boyfriend. By 'spending time', I mean I was laying on the bed while he played counterstrike. After an hour of silence (well no, he was talking to teammates), I got fed up and let him know I was upset about the situation. He apologized, then continued playing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 542

You deserved it 95

By sad - 16/07/2016 01:48 - United States - Rochester

Today, I realized that I'm either asexual or just really not attracted to my boyfriend anymore because being touched makes me feel violated. Either way I'm sad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 494

You deserved it 69

By Pruned fingers - 16/07/2016 01:34 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, I spent two hours washing the dishes. This is because my asshole of a brother would eat extremely small rations of food at a time to create more work for me. My parents didn't even notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 41

By CalebScott_03 - 16/07/2016 01:32 - United States - Fort Worth

Today,while having sex my wife wanted me to lay her down while she spread her legs and stick it in...I was all for it until she asked me..."is it in?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 444

You deserved it 41

By pokewife - 16/07/2016 01:24 - United States - Moreno Valley

Today, my husband got mad at me for coming home to change my daughters diaper. Reason being, he was going to miss a PokemonGo event where he could catch Pokemons. He's 28. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 71

By Irene_19 - 16/07/2016 01:23 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, marks day 15 since my long distance boyfriend stopped talking to me. Not sure if this is supposed to be his way of a break up or something happened because I can't get through to him no matter what. And I'm overly worried right now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 437

You deserved it 53

By IquitLIFE - 16/07/2016 01:05 - Israel - Tel Aviv

Today, I was fapping to some porn on the TV in my room when my mom came in to tell me what happened in Turkey. The TV swapped to the news channel because it was breaking news so she came in to me flogging the dolphin to a riot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 419

You deserved it 66

By confessionsofme - 16/07/2016 01:03 - United States - Arlington

Today I ended up going to my "boyfriend's" birthday party I saw the guy I had a crush on since 11th grade there. I tried to make small talk with him only to have him ignore me throughout the night. I then went to ask his friends why he wouldn't talk to me. They replied "he isn't into fat girls. fml.

I agree, your life sucks 288

You deserved it 75

By Mr_Cellophane99 - 16/07/2016 01:00 - United States

Today, I finally scored a deal on this sweet 2011 Chevy Cruze, I was headed to the dealership and saw the car I wanted driving up the ramp, crashing into another oncoming vehicle... and into a lightpole.... The dealer even had the audacity to ask if I still wanted to purchase the car... FML

I agree, your life sucks 286

You deserved it 19

By Unbansawsage - 16/07/2016 00:57 - United States - Gresham

Today, my mom had knee surgery, can't work So she told me not to any expect allowance for awhile. My PC won't work because my video card died so I busted my ass doing yard work for people to get a new one. A few weeks later and here I am with 500$ not able to buy it because it's "insensitive". FML

I agree, your life sucks 272

You deserved it 26

By GabenNewell2001 - 16/07/2016 00:49 - Canada - Westerose

Today, I was having sex with a girl, afterwards, I found a camera she recorded us with, but unfortunately she already sent it to her friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 216

You deserved it 22

By RenoSinclair - 16/07/2016 00:46 - United States - Dalton

Today, while discussing how thick my thighs are, my wife didn't hesitate to admit that she often fantasizes about taking a bite out of them. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 183

You deserved it 31

By WhyDoesThisAlwaysHappen - 16/07/2016 00:42

Today, I've finally accepted that the girl I had built my future around and would have been ridiculously proud to call mine has left me to go back to her ex. What's worse is I can't harbor any angry feelings towards them because I just want her happy. And now I'm alone again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 224

You deserved it 29

By Vampire2U - 16/07/2016 00:26 - United States - Oklahoma City

Today, my boyfriends extremely religious mother, who recently found out I moved in with him, took my to get birth control. From his grandmother who gave me a matching bag of condoms and lube, FML

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 22

By Anonymous - 16/07/2016 00:25 - United States - Minot

Today, after having went through immense knee pain to finish out the baseball season, I found out I have a concussion and won't get to play for the rest of the season anyway. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 166

You deserved it 20

By Anonymous - 16/07/2016 00:12 - United States - Houston

Today, it was my 6th year anniversary. I was on a business trip in California for the past week and came home early for our anniversary to surprise him. For the occasion, I dressed in lingerie, lit candles and prepared a romantic dinner. He came home with one of my co-workers naked...

I agree, your life sucks 242

You deserved it 21

By R.I.P - 16/07/2016 00:05

Today, when I arrived in China I could not connect to wifi without receiving a verification code through text. The reason I was trying to connect to wifi was so I can text other people and receive texts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 155

You deserved it 15

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The Top

Today, I told my boyfriend I'll be moving to a different state in a few months for a new job. He now refers to me as his "girlfriend for now". FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 896

You deserved it 2 838

Today, my son told me he liked a girl at school. I told him to be extra sweet to her, carry her bag, and make every day brighter for her. My husband snorted and said, "That's simp shit. Don't do any of that. Act like a man, and if she's not into you, shrug and move on." FML

I agree, your life sucks 408

You deserved it 300

Today, someone put dog turds underneath all the decorative reindeers' butts in my front yard. The chief suspect is my curmudgeonly, holidays-hating fuckball of a neighbor. Last week he repositioned them in very suggestive poses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 241

You deserved it 5 863

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of almost two years has been cheating on me with his ex. They had a horrible, abusive relationship and she even stabbed him at one point. I got him out of that situation and almost went broke doing that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 388

You deserved it 272

Today, I missed multiple calls from the company I applied to. That was the supervisor calling, wanting to hire me. I then remembered my idiotic voicemail I made months ago where I pretended to answer and say stupid stuff for 5 minutes. I don't think I'm going to get the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 017

You deserved it 55 265

Today, my mom came to me, hysterically crying that her boyfriend had hit and choked her. I’d feel bad for her except he’s my ex who also beat me, yet when I turned to my mother for help she decided to take him in instead and get pregnant with his kid. What goes around comes around bitch! FML

I agree, your life sucks 684

You deserved it 93