Today, I had to give a sexual harassment seminar to my department. Someone put in a complaint that my example made them feel uncomfortable. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I gave a sexual harassment seminar, explaining how important it is to not do anything that makes coworkers uncomfortable. Someone joked, "Like telling you your fly is open?" I tried to zip up, but it got caught on my underwear. There were 20 minutes left in the program. FML
Today, I had to go to a boring, never-ending "sensitivity training" session, all because my douchebag coworker filed a complaint against me last week after I apologized for being tardy. Apparently I was insulting people with mental disorders. Or as she put it, "differently-abled" people. FML
Today, I was carrying a stack of paperwork at work, when my pen rolled off and onto the floor. As soon as I bent down to pick it up, a nearby co-worker, who's always hated me, accused me of putting on a show and sexually harassing him. He actually followed up by reporting me to HR. FML
Today, I finally finished our two hour long yearly compliance training at work. Not five minutes later, I receive an email from our compliance department, notifying me of a complaint against me. FML
Today, I was fired from my job for sexual harassment. I was shopping after work, and I had to get my female manager to give me a package of extra-large condoms from the lockbox. I could not convince her that I was not flirting, and she took it to HR. FML
Today, I asked one of the girls at work out on a date. She responded by filing a harassment complaint. Now, I can't speak to her at all without being written up. FML
Today, my bitchy co-worker decided that being given a compliment on her shoes is sexual harassment, and worthy of reporting me to our boss over. FML
Today, after telling my boss that trailing a hand up someone's leg and leering at them constantly is counted as sexual harassment, I got called an "unappreciative little whiny bitch." FML
Today, a coworker filed a complaint against me, all because I ate a banana at lunch, which he claimed is "threateningly sexual", whatever the hell that means. FML
Today, I was pulled into an office by the head of my college department. I was told that I was “making someone uncomfortable” but refused to elaborate on who it was, or what I’d done wrong. How am I supposed to fix a problem if I don’t know what the problem is? FML
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Top comments
whatwhatindayeah 11
this post makes me feel uncomfortable. I think you're harassing me. that's sexist. that's racist.
Puffytruffles 18
I'm comfortable
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Comments (91)
whatwhatindayeah 11
this post makes me feel uncomfortable. I think you're harassing me. that's sexist. that's racist.
HiNowDie 17
Your username made me feel uncomfortable.
HKCgrimmjow 15
Your username made ME feel uncomfortable, maybe I don't wanna die!
whatwhatindayeah 11
you being uncomfortable makes me uncomfortable
Puffytruffles 18
I'm comfortable
whatwhatindayeah 11
but how comfortable are you really?
Enslaved 36
And I have become "Comfortably Numb"
an3ph 20
Your racism makes me sexist. Ima sue you.
CountWest 6
What what in the yeah? The hell are you insinuating?! Do your worst! Sexual harassment panda will always have my back...
whatwhatindayeah 11
dood sexual harassment panda is my brother
\ 28
This "political correctness" is becoming a pain in the ass.
fsomelife 26
Pain in the ass offends me. Also the dude up there who's comfortable with his puffy truffles is legitimately making me uncomfortable.
jerryj 27
The word "dude" makes me uncomfortable. I got excited reading it and may have become homosexual. I'm not quite sure, but I think you may be sexually harrassing me.
whatwhatindayeah 11
but how could you ever tell ?
JMichael 25
All you ******* are making me uncomfortable by talking about how everything makes you uncomfortable. I ******* hate you all.
jerryj 27
You talking dirty is making me horny...and uncomfortable. (You're a dude right?)
RedPillSucks 31
dont question your sexuality. just go with it,
IDontKnowWhoIAm04 24
I'm only slightly uncomfortable. Actually that's a lie. You just made me uncomfortable to the point where I wanted to lie.
Sniper_Chick4110 20
I feel uncomfortable by all these comments of Sexual Harrassment Panda, what happened to Pedo Bear?
whatwhatindayeah 11
hey ya know what I'm allergic to people who are uncomfortable
NiceGuysDoWin 21
All of the people in this thread being uncomfortable gives me 3rd party offense, and creates a hostile posting environment. I am gonna sue.
712sash 26
Hey! Atleast they learned something.
chabelo 10
Your profile picture makes me feel uncomfortable
712sash 26
Don't look at it then :)
Nilorak 24
Nu får ni ge er!
laden_swallow09 34
Don't put your body on display; it's not like this is a dating site. Get over yourself.
Rainhawk94 27
I really don't understand why people put their real faces on this, it's not Facebook or a dating site. Most of the well know fml users like doc, noor,and welshite don't have their real face
Rainhawk94 27
And I'm probably going on a rant here but every time i read a girls description saying that she's taken, don't hit on me, no perverts, and/or creeps, are the ones who have profile pictures of themselves. If you don't want any problems put a picture of a panda and you're less likely too be hit on
saad2605 16
I'm hoping it wasn't a hands on example.
mansfield_j 27
Some people just suck
AnonymousAlpaca1 18
What did you just say? SUCK?! You pig! SEXUAL HARASSMENT!
sisco2901 20
And some don't... Wait.
jlamb0328 4
They must have never heard the words kinky before
keirissleepy 10
please think of the children
ZombieSazza 34
What the actual ****? Are people really that stupid that when they're educated about something important that they need to file a complaint about it?!
FucYoCouch 13
The word "****" means to Fornicate Under Commands of the King, therfore, you have just implied the yearn to have sex. By over analyzing this and blowing it vastly out of proportion, I now feel uncomfortable. You'll be hearing from my attorney, good sir.
Polynomial 28
As will your couch, good sir.
Wakachulak 22
No it is not. The word is Saxon in origin. You have offended the Majesty and all of Saxon descent. Apologize or be sued.
LennyComa 39
**** did not develop from an acronym, It found it's way into English around the 15th century and came from either Low German or Dutch, I was first written in 1500 in encrypted latin in a poem called "Flen, Flyss" as fuccant meaning they **** in Psudeo Latin. I really hate when people state it was from an acronym so I don't even care about the Down votes.
FucYoCouch 13
45, it was a joke. Hence me saying "over analyzing"...
littlekellilee 45
45 why are you so annoyed by the false background of a common day swear? Some people get angry about the use of it, you get angry about people mis-stating its history.
Bloink 25
well that's ironic
tazmanmike2013 17
We need these types of laws to protect people but at the same time they are very easily abused. I've seen people who've been actually harassed and these laws did a great job of protecting them. On the flip side I've seen more than a couple of cases where these laws were used to get someone in trouble because the accuser didn't like them. In one particular case I saw someone who got in trouble for doing something wrong at work and then put in a harassment claim against their boss when they were disciplined. In this case is was proved that she was being vindictive and the claim was false. FYL for sure if this person putting in the claim is trying to do something bad to you. It's a shame that so many people abuse these laws, which are meant to protect.
coxenator1105 9
what a troll lol
Bubblez2009 15
What was the example??
LowExpectations 30
It must've been that crude cartoon of a caterpillar trying to make it with a french fry.