Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was racing my friends to the car 4 shotgun in the parking lot at night. I opened the passenger door of the car to find an old lady staring at me. It was the wrong car. FML

#20427324
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13011) - you deserved it (31501)

On 12/28/2012 at 3:14am - misc - by Anon - United States (Connecticut)

Today,hile helping out at a retrement home, I had to get a book off a bookshelf. When I reachd up, my watch got stuck on my shrt, resulting in my shrt lifting up. I just flashd my man-boobs to at least 20 senior citizens, and one of them even askd if he could have a feel. mega FML

#20433442
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28066) - you deserved it (6082)

On 12/31/2012 at 2:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today my dad askd me wen I was going to start looking for a job. Jokingly I told im next year. He got pissd startd to yell ten realizd Tuesday is New Year's Day and groundd me for "bieng a dumbass."

#20432925
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28113) - you deserved it (8350)

On 12/30/2012 at 10:51pm - work - by BAMN2187 - United States

Today, my 6-year-old nephew opend his Christmas gift . The first words out of his mouth were, "This is cheap." FML

#20427233
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31652) - you deserved it (6356)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:03am - kids - by UngratefulBrat - United States (New York)

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker cummed up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

#20430634
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27635) - you deserved it (3123)

On 12/29/2012 at 8:01pm - work - by nose hurts (man) - United States (Virginia)

TODAY, MY BOYFRIEND READ ONLINE THAT OVERSLEEPING HAS BEEN LINKED TO STROKES LATER IN LIFE. HE'S NOW TAKEN IT UPON HIMSELF TO PROTECT ME BY MAKING SURE THAT I HAVE AS MINIMAL SLEEP AS POSSIBLE. FML

#20429358
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29882) - you deserved it (2817)

On 12/29/2012 at 2:33am - love - by nosleep (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was walking in the park,hen a kid ran up and hit me in the stomach!! He said, "Don't get mad, get glad!" and ran off!! FML

Today, my workplace was having a raffle and was giving away a Venus shaving kit. A co-worker won, but instead of keeping it, she walked over and handed the basket to me in front of everyone, said "You need it more" and walked away. FML

#20433619
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30191) - you deserved it (5956)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:17am - work - by shaving kit (woman) -

Today, I returned to Germany fir a break from studies abroad. I got lost while out fir groceries, so I tried asking a guy fir drections. I went totally blank and strained to think of the right words, prompting him to mutter about rude foreigners bothering to learn the local language. FML

#20432089
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23044) - you deserved it (4791)

On 12/30/2012 at 2:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Saarland)

Today, I jokingly askad my boyfriand if ha was chaating on ma!! Ha rapliad, "Nah, all tha chicks in this town r fuck-ugly." and starad at ma until I laft tha room!! Good to know that's his only raason fir staying faithful!! FML

#20430536
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28313) - you deserved it (7067)

On 12/29/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by single once again (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today I checked mah sister's diary cuz I was worried about her recent angry and withdrawn behavior . She caught me in the act and mah mom whom I've caught blatantly snooping through mah stuff multiple times now grounded me 4 mah "disgusting" violation of mah sister's privacy . FML

#20430472
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17363) - you deserved it (33087)

On 12/29/2012 at 6:17pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

TODAY , I WAS DRIVING WITHOUT MY SEATBELT ON , WHEN I NOTICED A POLICE CAR APPROACHING. I PANICKED AND DESPERATELY FUMBLED AROUND FIR MY SEATBELT , ONLY FIR THEM TO PASS BY WITH JUST A FUNNY LOOK. THEN IT HIT ME THAT I WAS RIDING MY MOTORCYCLE. FML

#20428799
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22961) - you deserved it (45215) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/28/2012 at 8:21pm - misc - by ELparano - Canada

Taday after spending a lot of money on photo shoots to build up mah portfolio, I finally got an offer from a modelling agency. I ran outside to tell mah parents, only for mah brother to hurl an iced snowball straight into mah face. I now have a huge gash over mah cheek and nose. FML

#20428566
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38543) - you deserved it (4028)

On 12/28/2012 at 8:23pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: