FML : School, Your everyday life stories

Today, despite being the president of the Japanese club at my school since it started, my mom will not let me go on a school-sponsored trip to Japan. She's worried that North Korea will fire a missile at Japan while I'm there. FML

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ChromoTec Say more :

Hey, OP here. I couldn't fit everything inside the 300-character limit, so I'll just explain it here. She says we don't have the money to go, which currently we don't, but she refused all of my fundraising ideas and made me take down my GoFundMe page, and since she doesn't let me get a job either, I'm stuck with no way to pay for it. I've tried again and again to get her to let me go, but she won't...

By ChromoTec - / Monday 24 September 2018 22:38 /

Today, I found out that even though I’m a wonderful singer, my choir teacher gave me a B in the class because I didn’t have “enough facial expression”. I got marked down for a resting bitch face without a warning. FML

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lifeis4me Say more :

OP here. Yeah, I understand that facial expression is part of being a performer. My problem was that she never said anything to me before (no warning). Also, there’s a bunch of my peers don’t sing at all or they’re just playing/laughing, yet they have A’s

By lifeis4me - / Monday 24 September 2018 22:38 /

Today, I went to my little brother's high school to speak to his counselor about his grades. On my way to the office, the office manager threatened to write me up for ditching class and told me that high school is not like middle school, 9th grade will be different. I graduated 5 years ago. FML

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By Bibi - / Sunday 23 September 2018 12:00 /

Today, I went to apply for classes at a college my parents signed me up to do dual credit with. Too bad they used my sister's social security number so I don't get credit for my old classes and my new application got thrown out. FML

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By ShinedownCM - / Sunday 23 September 2018 05:00 /

Today, I took my transfer student, who I am hosting for her year of study in America, to the doctor. It turns out that she is pregnant, and my teenage son is the father. FML

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By Host grandfather - / Friday 21 September 2018 06:00 / United States - Tampa

Today, one of my residents was having super loud sex. I'm an RA in a college freshman dorm, and I had to knock on her door and tell her to quiet down. I hate to be a cock-block, but she woke multiple people up, myself included. I live 4 doors down the hall from her. FML

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By awkwardRA - / Wednesday 19 September 2018 03:30 /

Today, I was finally cast in my high school play. As Violet. The gum chewer who turns into a blueberry. Does my instructor not know I'm a guy? FML

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By cmondude - / Tuesday 18 September 2018 15:30 /

Online Dating = Brutal

Today, I realised just how lonely I am. After using Tinder for about a week, I got my first match. I said hi while I was in class since I was excited, but by the time I'd gotten back home, she'd unmatched me. I've never felt so hurt by a complete stranger before. FML

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By kirbykylestorm - / Sunday 16 September 2018 20:30 /

Today, we're taking the plane home from Dublin after a school trip that I only barely got onto after troubles with my passport. Luckily for me, a kind person has decided to save me from the passport this evening - together with the rest of my wallet. I'm stuck. FML

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By Imdead - / Friday 14 September 2018 22:00 /

Today, my math teacher had to call me because my grade is so bad. It's only the second week of school. FML

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Alaina Heuerman Say more :

Soooo uh this was mine, but! I DID IT! I went from an F to a B! I’m not failing!

By bad at math - / Friday 14 September 2018 13:51 / United States - Cape Coral

Today, I finally found out why I got a D in a class last semester. It was a heavily attendance-based class, and apparently he only marked you present if you participated in class discussion. It was a 100-seat lecture. FML

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By Anonymous - / Friday 14 September 2018 03:30 /

Today, my fiancé got his associate degree in the mail. Wanting to surprise him when he got home, I opened it to display it before going out to buy groceries. His dog got a hold of his degree and shredded it to pieces. FML

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By Nola - / Thursday 13 September 2018 22:00 /

Today, I got home from school and my mom grabbed me by the shirt, completely unprovoked, and threatened to make my life a living hell if she finds out I'm not changing my pad at school. I have no idea where that came from. I change it regularly. FML

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By etr - / Thursday 13 September 2018 14:30 / United States

Today, I found out that I have to have my wisdom teeth removed. The appointment for the surgery is in the middle of this week, but none of my professors believe me. I have been given the same "lame excuse to get out of school" lecture five times. FML

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By Not an excuse - / Tuesday 11 September 2018 15:00 /

Today, at gym class, coach placed the boys on an "advanced level" rope climb by having a girl cling on their back. I got paired with my crush. As he climbed, we were trailing behind so I cheered for him to go faster. He loudly responded, "Why don't you go on a diet!?" FML

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By Dulok Warrior Princess - / Monday 10 September 2018 19:30 / United States - New York

Today, at lunch, I was talking to my friends about having a boyfriend. Suddenly, some boy I don't even know said, "Nobody wants to date that ugly bitch." FML

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By izzy_the_pessimist - / Monday 10 September 2018 18:30 /

Today, I finished my 83-page thesis for my Stanford class and put it on my desk. Then, as a prank, my girlfriend hid it. She forgot where she put it. The thesis is due in 3 days. FML

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By Batman - / Sunday 9 September 2018 23:30 /

Awkward...

Today, I moved in with my friend and her husband so we can be roommates during school. Today is also the day they decided to get a divorce. It's going to be a long year. FML

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By Ohnowhy - / Sunday 9 September 2018 18:30 /

Today, I was on a 3-way call with my wife and the bank. The bank said we didn't qualify for school loans, which means I have to drop out. As soon as the bank hung up, my wife stayed on the line to tell me she wants a divorce and that she regrets our marriage. FML

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By Brad - / Friday 7 September 2018 18:30 /

My Bucket

Today, my college class has a strict rule that ANY absence, even if it's because you're sick and have a doctor's note, will drop your grade a letter grade. I have a chronic illness. Today is the second time in the first two weeks that I've had to show up to class with a bucket. FML

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By pyook - / Thursday 6 September 2018 23:30 /

World

Today, we had an assembly with my entire grade to elect the graduation committee. When I got up to get nominated for the yearbook team, I stumbled and face-planted on stage. In front of 89 people. FML

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By Sound - / Thursday 6 September 2018 18:30 / Germany

Today, my dorm's fire alarm went off. In the rush to escape, I slipped and fell off my bunk bed, breaking my ankle in two places. Crying, I told my roommates I needed help to walk. They shrugged and left after mentioning that I would slow them down. FML

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By Crispy cripple - / Wednesday 5 September 2018 18:30 /

Today at university, I saw a girl on crutches struggling to make it up the stairs to the dining center. Feeling sympathetic, I politely offered to help her with her bags, and she declined. By declined, I mean she maced me. FML

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By What did I do wrong? - / Tuesday 4 September 2018 18:30 / United States - Manhattan

Today, I was bitching to my mom on the phone about the long, boring paper assignment my Lit professor gave us. Right after saying "that woman needs to get laid" I heard hysterical laughing behind me. I turned. Hello professor, just on my way to drop the course. FML

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By FirstWeekFail - / Tuesday 4 September 2018 18:30 /

World

Today, I tried to look cool while playing beer pong. Instead, I slipped violently on a puddle of spilled beer, threw my drink over the person next to me and on the ground, and then fell face-first into the mess I made. FML

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By Baddrunk - / Tuesday 4 September 2018 09:30 / Australia - Brisbane

Today, I found out why my professor accused me of not handing in an important essay before the due date. Apparently she spilled coffee all over it and didn't dare to tell me. FML

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By Sleuth - / Sunday 2 September 2018 13:00 /

Today, I went to my dorm's community bathroom to do my business. After releasing the Kraken, as I was wiping, I accidentally let go of the toilet paper. Instead of the toilet, it hit the floor in the next stall. Someone was in there. FML

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By hcditfi5foygy - / Friday 31 August 2018 20:30 /

That's a lot of damage!

Today, I had to do a still life of a pillowcase for my drawing class. To make up for bad grades I've gotten before, I followed my professor's directions to a T. He took 19 points off because I drew the background when no one else did. We have to do it for every piece. FML

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By Stressed_Out_Student - / Wednesday 29 August 2018 22:00 /

Today, my brother stole my hard drive and wiped it. My hard drive had a 10-page school project on it. The project is due tomorrow. FML

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By despacito - / Tuesday 28 August 2018 23:30 /

Today, while preparing to move into my dorm, I received two e-mails from the campus police. The first stated that there had been 76 overdoses from a synthetic drug reported around campus this week and the second said there had been a stabbing on campus this morning. Happy back to school to me. FML

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By Backtoschool - / Tuesday 28 August 2018 15:00 /

Happy birthday !

MelissaHope1986

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FML

Today, my wife asked me to come talk to her in the bedroom. Thinking she wanted to have a quickie while her sister was spending time with our son, I rushed...

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Today, I just got my very first paycheck of $129... for over 40 hours of work. I got payed roughly $3.00 an hour (Alaska minimum is $9.50), and my HR office...

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Today, I couldn't get out of bed due to severe morning sickness. I have to lay still and I can only hold in some tiny crackers. It's the second day of...

Today, I went on a blind date. As I waited for him in a pet-friendly mall, my friend said, "He's eccentric and has swag!" I didn't exactly know what she...

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Today, I found out that my girlfriend secretly purchased a vibrator and has been using it for the past two weeks. When I confronted her, her only argument...

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Today, after years of telling my boyfriend I don't do anal, I agreed to try it once just to get him to stop whining about it. He was so gung-ho that he...

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