Addict

By Anonymous - 23/09/2013 02:56 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my mother asked me if she could borrow $200. Being the lovely daughter I am, I gave her my bank card to withdraw it herself. She gambled it away and maxed my bank account out. I had $1500 saved. FML
I agree, your life sucks 45 726
You deserved it 20 846

Same thing different taste

Top comments

I'm sorry to hear. but please get her to seek help as pathological gambling can be as debilitating as using drugs. Take care xx

thegravytrain 6

1) Inform her that she needs to pay you back. Also, understand it likely isn't going to happen. 2) Show her those free casino games on iphones or whatever, that are cheap and free. She can play out her gambling addiction, without actually going bankrupt. Simple, huh? I have a family member who wasted thousands until someone just got him a smartphone with the casino app and said "here. play this. itll cost you a couple bucks a month instead of hundreds or thousands" and he just uses that and pays like $2.99 for more chips if hes out, that lasts him at least a week or two. 3) Understand it's not being a good daughter to enable someone's addiction. If you didn't know, that sucks. But she needs help, not gambling money

Comments

I'm sorry to hear. but please get her to seek help as pathological gambling can be as debilitating as using drugs. Take care xx

Not necessarily pathological. Casinos use all kinds of tricks to entice everyone who walks through the door into bankruptcy.

It doesn't have to just be casinos. Could be sports gambling, lottery tickets, anything that could involve throwing money on. I know it sounds crazy OP but your mom needs some help before her problem gets worse. You have every right to be angry with her but in the end this could just be a very tough time she's going through right now. Sorry to hear about this debacle OP good luck to you!!

You couldn't figure out about your mothers gambling problems? And why didn't you just withdraw the amount she needed? It's like giving a teenager a credit card... I'm sorry but you should've known better YDI.

You know, some people are closet addicts. She probably trusted her mom enough to give her the card, not knowing she had a problem with gambling. And sorry OP, I hope she pays you back.

31, So OP should just never trust her own mother, especially when she thinks nothing is wrong?

No I'm saying giver her the amount she asked for not give the kid keys to the candy store

CallMeMcFeelii 13

I agree with you, 31. I would gotten the amount she asked for. Not gave her my bank card. My brother will ask for some money every so often. I sure as **** don't give him my card to take it out himself. It's not so much about trust, more about responsibility. I'm the one responsible for that money.

My sister used to ask, every two weeks, for fifty bucks. I gave her the money at first, thinking she needed it for bills because she was having trouble with her job and getting hours. Then, after the second time, I asked her what she was using the money for. She said, "I am going to the bar with friends." I stopped giving her money. Now I always ask people what they plan on using the money for. Most people will answer "bills" or "gas." If I get, "new shoes" or something similar, I don't loan them the money. Then again, I am poor so I don't have money to loan out like that.

I only ever loan out money once doesn't matter the amount, and until it gets paid back, I never loan money to that person again. Now I have given money to family members when they really need it to keep afloat, as they have for me. But giving is different than loaning.

If my mom asked me for money: "Bitch swerve! You work I don't!Uh, bye!!" Anyone else? No? Okay....

I gotta say YDI, you know your mother and if she has a gambling addiction dont feed it, either help her work out of it or stop feeding her with money, or at least give her cash

I'm guessing dear ol mom didn't win big? Figure out an interest rate for repayment...

Yeah, if she's a gambler she's probably never going to pay up. Just pawn some expensive but replaceable items (nothing truly sentimental) until you have your money back. Then you can tell her she can just buy new items if she wants them when she "wins big".

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i think she believed her, thats why she just casually gave it to her

It probably wasn't out of sheer laziness that she just forked over access to her money. I'd be willing to bet that she was making a gesture of love/trust with her mother. It seems as though she was surprised that she'd do something like that, so it's probably the first time it's happened. I'm not saying it was smart, by any means. I have to say though, I know my mom wouldn't ever do something like that. She'd let me use her card all the time because she trusted me, and while I personally would take her with me to withdraw the money from an ATM in that situation, I don't believe that she'd ever have done something like that.

My parents and I know each other's PINs. I know my grandmother's, too. But we've proven each other trustworthy for many years with it. It's easier for my grandma to give me her debit card to go and do her grocery shopping and take out extra cash there, because she's 83 and can't walk around too much. It's all about who you can truly trust. And OP just learned that mom isn't trustworthy.

O I'm sorry to hear that op! You should talk to your mom though about gambling to make sure that she doesn't have a problem.

Why are there negative votes on this? She SHOULD talk to her mom and get her help if she has a problem.

Willibobs 33

I think it's pretty obvious she has a gambling problem if she's just blown 1500 in a gambling session don't you?! Especially so because she willingly stole off of her own child. Disgraceful behaviour.

She obviously already has a problem. I'm a mother and could never ask my kids for something like that. It's my job to take care of them. It's them who should be asking me for money not the other way around. Not that I would just hand money out to my kids they need to earn it. I do agree that it wouldn't hurt for the daughter to talk to her but if she is addicted to it then if she really wants to stop she will but if not there's nothing anyone can say to her to make her she has to want it. I can only hope that thru this it has made her feel so bad that she herself can realize she obviously has a problem and chooses to get help. I'm so sorry, to hear this I really do hope all comes together as far as the money and your mom's gambling.

obviously not if she needed the $400 to begin with. sorry about that OP

thegravytrain 6

1) Inform her that she needs to pay you back. Also, understand it likely isn't going to happen. 2) Show her those free casino games on iphones or whatever, that are cheap and free. She can play out her gambling addiction, without actually going bankrupt. Simple, huh? I have a family member who wasted thousands until someone just got him a smartphone with the casino app and said "here. play this. itll cost you a couple bucks a month instead of hundreds or thousands" and he just uses that and pays like $2.99 for more chips if hes out, that lasts him at least a week or two. 3) Understand it's not being a good daughter to enable someone's addiction. If you didn't know, that sucks. But she needs help, not gambling money

Great advice! Also, difficult as it may be to report her for stealing the money, that should be done if she doesn't pay it back. Sometimes people need to have real consequences before they stop destructive behavior. If it was anyone else, OP would have them in jail already. Why should abuse of the "mommy card" equal a free pass on grand theft?

where I live if you gave someone your card to use you can't press charges if they take more than you allow! Because you gave them permission to use it. same with the car, if you give someone permission to drive your car on Monday & they go & take it without asking on Friday you can't press charges for them stealing your car, because you gave them initial permission! Talk about a dumbass law!

glamorous18 10

it's like that where I live too. it's called common sense.

Oh god that sucks so much op!! Try to get her help about the gambling addiction. And hopefully she pays you back!!!

This is why I do not trust even my own mother when money is concerned.

TyT63 12

Clearly she sees money as the root of all evil. Therefore, decided to blow it all away. She was doing you a favor, obviously. No, seriously though. What the hell is wrong with your mother?! Oh wait. That's right. She has a gambling problem. FHL & FYL. I'm sorry, OP.