Today, I was going on a dinner date with a girl I had just met. After I picked her up I asked her if she would like to get lobster. She looked at me and asked if those were the red ones. Confused I nodded. She replied, "Sorry, I don't eat red meat." I laughed. She was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46846) - you totally deserved it (3375)
On 04/06/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)
Well, I'd say it's an fml because the dude apparently can't find any dates that are smarter than a box of rocks.
This FML reminds me of my ex (not ex at the time) whom I convinced her that I didn't complete 7th grade and I had to go back or else they would take away my HS diploma.
#8 - On 04/06/2009 at 8:13pm by Lou_Briccant
you should keep going out with her as a joke and just fuck with her head until you get bored and tell her you are looking for someone that isn't as smart as her, and then call her retarded just to confuse her.
#12 - On 04/06/2009 at 8:22pm by Uconnrunner
hahah. but i don't get what being blonde has to do with it.
#18 - On 04/06/2009 at 8:30pm by amoureaux
WHY are you buying this girl lobster??? Are you insane?
1. Buy her a salad.
2. Afterward, tell her that you heard on the news that there was a samonella outbreak in the area and it was traced to green foods like salads.
3. Tell her that scientists have just discovered that semen kills the samonella bacteria, but it must be swallowed as soon as possible.
Done!
LMAO @20...
And I think FML needs like FAQ about what anonymous means...it's getting kinda ridiculous...
#28 - On 04/06/2009 at 8:53pm by save_me_08
hey hey #2 no insulting the blonds! There are plenty of us intelligent blonds in the world!
To the OP, well at least you got a good early warning on this one! Not really a FML so much as FHL.
Haha! Though it makes me sad to see the lobsters all in those little tanks...but they taste really good, so I try to forget it! ;D
#42 - On 04/06/2009 at 9:14pm by sondramcfail
I'm a natural blonde, have a cumulative college GPA of 3.7 [after 4 years] and am planning on attending graduate school. The assumption that hair color is corollary to intelligence is not only inaccurate (especially since the majority of "dumb blondes" happen to be bottle blondes) but it is also ridiculous and unfounded. How is that statement any better than asking if she were of a minority ethnic group? I'm not trying to personally attack you however. After all, it is society as a whole that is flawed and continues to perpetuate this ridiculous fallacy about hair color being indicative of stupidity.
That said, OP, this girl is obviously not very intellectually gifted. I'm sure you can do better for yourself.
#52 - On 04/06/2009 at 9:48pm by mylifesucks_alot
.........
...........
..............
...... i...own a Corolla :D
....
#148 - On 08/15/2009 at 11:45am by BrEnNo1023
and by the way, why would you be buying this broad a fucking lobster. If you ask me, she'd have been content with a big Mac...
#54 - On 04/06/2009 at 9:51pm by 7_______7_______
haha stupid
it's ok, just take her out for a burger. cows aren't red =)
#55 - On 04/06/2009 at 9:51pm by observer12
Once again. Why do FML's like this one make it on the site. It's not that funny. And it's not a FYL. It's a FHL for being so stupid.
LMAO. good luck with that one. i agree with what people said, i hope she's at least hot if nothing else.
Honestly, there is nothing wrong with eating some red meat.I know some people think it's bad for you But don't use that bull$#¡t excuse when he's willing to pay money for expensive food. Dumb that b¡t€# NOWWWWW!
#61 - On 04/06/2009 at 10:07pm by laxingitup
So shes either six and your a creeper. Or shes a blond with an IQ that matches her shoe size.
Either way sucks to be you
LOLOLOLOL
I swear this is the best FML on here....SO SO Funny!!! oh my gosh..dying of laughter
#64 - On 04/06/2009 at 10:15pm by dol567
LOL, there are so many people that don't know what "anonymous" means, it's pretty sad. =D
#67 - On 04/06/2009 at 10:21pm by turtlellama
#62 - FHL = F**** her life
Like FML, FYL...just think of what the middle letter would be
#69 - On 04/06/2009 at 10:26pm by dol567
Man, I totally know what that's like...
No matter how pretty the girl, it's never worth it.
#71 - On 04/06/2009 at 10:34pm by Vinatierri
#52, you just opened my mind. I will no longer think of blondes as dumb bitches. Now I will just think of them as bitches ;). Stereotypes happen. fmylife.com is not exactly the best place to go about changing them.
lol at 65. especially since she sounds like she's trying too hard to come off intelligent. no one talks like that.
and OP, at least you found out she was an idiot before you spent all that money on a lobster dinner.
#75 - On 04/06/2009 at 10:40pm by RyeBreadBoy
I totally know what this is like. No matter how pretty the girl--it's not worth it!
#76 - On 04/06/2009 at 10:41pm by Vinatierri
the blonde who says she has a cumulative gpa of 3.7 grades do not reflect ones intelligence it shows that you work hard and prepare well for test and papers, and good at memorizing information.
I once had a gf who didnt know that Eskimos where of the same species as us.
#78 - On 04/06/2009 at 10:58pm by notyouraverage
Were you, by chance, on a date with Jessica Simpson? She's incredibly brilliant when it comes to meats, I hear.
you kinda deserved that one for being shallow. get to know someone a little before going out with them. especially if they are your run-of-the-mill 'hot'.
#83 - On 04/06/2009 at 11:37pm by mlif_iilwafyog
77, you dont get a 3.7 in college by memorization. in hs yes, college no.
#84 - On 04/06/2009 at 11:53pm by notyouraverage
I like how #52 tried so hard to prove how intelligent sie is.
Welcome to the internet, where no one cares. (I also don't think anyone *really* believes there is any correlation between hair color and intelligence. All it is is a stupid, overplayed joke that hasn't been funny for about a thousand years.)
#84, depends on the class/program/degree. I've taken plenty of classes that require nothing but the ability to memorize vast amounts of information in a short amount of time. Critical thinking not required. How impressive your college GPA is is hugely dependent on what you're studying, I think. Medicine is a whole lot different than "recreation." (Do they even have "recreation" degrees anymore?)
Seriously dude, if she's hot stick with it. Go find a smart girl on the side to get married to. The dumb one still won't know what the eff is going on between you.
Keeping the smart one from knowing you're cheating though, that's a different story.
#88 - On 04/07/2009 at 12:08am by vt_mruhlin
If you're at the age where the girls you pick up have intellect like this, going to a seafood place is way overdoing it (at least ordering such an expensive meal like lobster is.)
#89 - On 04/07/2009 at 12:13am by Nakedsquirrel
well to be honest with you, if you wanted to impress her, you failed misserably. she does not even probably know how to appreciate good food at least. now if she is very hot, i might consider overlooking that fact, but overall i could say, don't bother. with that girl.
#82 made my day a whole lot better.
My vote is don't take someone for lobster unless it is a serious relationship. That way, you won't waste money on a complete dumbass.
YDI because you can't pick smart girls to date... seriously.
#94 - On 04/07/2009 at 1:32am by poopooface
Not really an FML. Seems like you got a clear sign that she's a colossal dumbass, and now you know to avoid her.
I'm sure someone else has said it but lobster is seafood...red meat is from animals that go moo. YDI for not pointing that out.
#52 actually made me laugh.
you're trying to convince us all that blodes are not always dumb (which is stupid because we all know this anyway.... no one takes it seriously) and you use the word 'fallacy' incorrectly:)
a fallacy is a flaw in reasoning.
FAIL ON YOU.
#98 - On 04/07/2009 at 4:13am by schadenfreudeFTW
...Just when you thought Jessica Simpson's brain-dead antics about the dreaded chicken-fish were over...someone pipes up with this gem about lobsters.
Doesn't it suck how the challenged look just like the norms?
#99 - On 04/07/2009 at 5:19am by nebjamin69
1. Did you ask for a date because of her looks, or IQ?
2. Just because she gets something wrong like that doesn't mean she's a moron - just confused about some things. She could be a total wizard at integral calculus, for example.
3. Did you try talking to her about topics that actually interest you? I'm sure that after the first 5 seconds, discussing the colour of lobster meat loses its novelty anyway. :o)
If you enjoy talking about the same things, does it matter if she gets some things wrong?
4. We've all shown our complete lack of knowledge on something that those around us think is universally important. (I chose my time to do this on a New York sidewalk - my girlfriend hid and pretended not to know me :o)
5. She could also be the most loving, caring, gentle and thoughtful person on the planet. But you would probably have to talk with her for more than 30 seconds to find that out.
well, its either she's retarded, or will do anything to get out of going on a date with you.
either way, NEVER GO OUT WITH HER AGAIN.
#111 - On 04/07/2009 at 4:16pm by cheerloveexx3
Yeahhh....well yeah shes probably blonde or if she is drop dead gorgeous i wouldn't have left her right away and taken her home for the night. If shes ugly just ditch right away...i mean you can do so much better
#112 - On 04/07/2009 at 4:26pm by allstarplayer324
How is that an FML? Now you can take her out for a burger and fries!
#118 - On 04/07/2009 at 9:11pm by Thow_it_up
i love how #52 tried defeating a stereotype about "dumb blondes" by trashing "bottle blondes." riveting. -____-
oh and btw i happen to be a bottle blonde, with a 4.0GPA. moral? stop talking shit over the internet. it doesn't impress anyone.
Woah!!! Slow down there #122.
Stop talking shit over the internet. Then what would people have to do with their time?
Internet gods abound in anonymous forums. This will never change.
"The assumption that hair color is corollary to intelligence is not only inaccurate"
You mean correlated, honey.
At least you found out she is a dumb ass before you spent any more time and money dating this girl.
#126 - On 04/07/2009 at 10:58pm by starshine3987
LOLOLOLOLOL when I first started reading it I thought it was going to be something about the colour change when you cook it but this is sooooooooooooooooooooooo much better!!! xD LMFAO
wow I didn't think those girls actually exist. o_O
#128 - On 04/08/2009 at 1:20am by youareindeepshit
sounds like this little girl that was arguing that she didnt eat dark meat, she only ate legs and she didnt like breasts
#133 - On 04/08/2009 at 10:36pm by sunshyne84
Hahaha! That's actually kind of cute, but maybe that's just because I have a 3-year-old daughter who said something similar to that the other day.
Either way ... She sounds a little, erm, dull? Not the brightest star in the sky ... or, rather, if you will, the reddest fish containing red meat in the sea.
#2, I'm blond and I'm the smartest person inside my household. You're ignorant for just assuming the woman was blond.
#137 - On 04/09/2009 at 4:05pm by IAmBridgette
this is my favorite fml EVER. Oh man. I wish people would post more stuff about other people being stupid.
I love that people like this exist.
#137, cry about it.
oh blonds stfu about the smart blond thing. you know everyone saying the girl was blond is either kidding or just trying to piss you off. the fact that is does piss you off -as someone previousy, sarcastically stated- makes them feel so you aren't a dumb bitch, you're just a bitch.
lol to all comments and the OP.
Anyone can say they have a fabulous GPA on the internet. Doesn't prove anything.
#143 - On 06/06/2009 at 10:25am by turdburgers
#77: Your amazingly articulate post was a delight to read. I am astonished by the amazing intelligence required to formulate those sentences. Clearly you must be a god among men.
#144 - On 06/10/2009 at 9:52am by Ventriloquisitor
and your repetitive diction makes me want to hurl. Using big words wont make up for your lack of variety if you want to sound intelligent, nor does your final fragment of a sentence, a semi-colon would have been the proper punctuation mark in said instance, not a period.
FACE PWN!
p.s. Im an 18 year old guy. Awesome use of stereotyping as a response to the anger you felt at the previous commenters who were bashing blondes; truly an "amazing" example of both your maturity level and true intelligence.
Ouch. Im honestly glad I'm not you right now.
#146 - On 07/31/2009 at 3:28am by I_am_Lathan
oh my god! inwould keep her and just do so many things! she obviously isn't smart enough to think for herself (logically, at least).
