Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my penis over my jeans and said "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (107564) - you totally deserved it (14486)
On 03/15/2009 at 11:20pm - intimacy - by illequipt - Canada (Ontario)
(+1)Baby penis trying to come out of shell.. Hahah XD
My boyfriend can wear briefs AND jeans..and I can tell just by looking if he's hard or not.
Poor OP.
(0)if she loves you, she'll get over it, and quickly.
if she's a slut then forget it. and her.
#128 - On 04/30/2010 at 7:57pm by mochalatte
(0)how does he desirve having a small penis it's sumthing you're born with no sumthin u can help
#134 - On 07/01/2010 at 12:36pm by campbellshayla73
(+2)Maybe it was the first time for her to fool around with a guy like that period and she just didn't know what it's supposed to feel like/what it feels like when it's not hard?!
She obviously has never touched a penis before...because even if it was pretty small you can still tell if the guy is hard or not... o.O
#4 - On 03/16/2009 at 7:23am by Puolukka
(0)it pretty hard not to know when a guy is hard since it just stick up out of no where -.-
#115 - On 02/10/2010 at 11:20pm by TWSSMoment
(+3)"Get hard for me"?
LOL! That's a stupid thing to say! What did she expect you to do...flex it?
#10 - On 03/16/2009 at 8:30am by bigcrazymike
(+1)Well, it seems you have a certain ability that allows you to fulfill her wishes even before she utters them. Use it wisely! ;)
#12 - On 03/16/2009 at 8:34am by csigabajnok
(+1)actually it's true that you can barely feel anything through jeans
my ex boyfriend definitely wasn't small, and through track pants, dress pants, etc. I can feel him being hard immediately
but through jeans? nopes!
(0)Whahah, I don't think the problem is in your willy, I think she wasn't even paying attention to that.
(0)what kind of underwear were you wearing? at first I didn't realize when my last bf was hard because I was used to guys wearing boxers, and he wore boxer briefs. those definitely mask erections...especially through jeans; it's harder to tell through jeans than any other kind of pants.
(0)maybe you should start wearing tights so your ego isn't hurt for the silliest of things. (jeans are thick and very constricting)
also, you're girlfriend sounds like a bit of a bimbo. "get hard for me" baha righhhht
#20 - On 03/16/2009 at 10:44am by vonstrangle
(0)Definitely the jeans... unless they were skinny jeans lol
And I dunno if you know Bo Burnham but he has a song about this, it might make you feel better:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Svbyc87V9pg&feature=channel_page
(0)i heart bo burnham. and i doubt it was you, honestly, jeans disguise boners. my boyfriend gets aggravated if i make him hard in shorts cause its alot harder to conceal.
(0)She must not have been paying attention. I was fooling around with a guy once who was very tiny and even though when I felt it I was disappointed I still new the lil sucker was at attention.
(+1)Lol. Funny.
Should have told her "You want me to get hard? Why don't you help me with your mouth, because the harder you suck the bigger it gets"
(0)Agreed with #13.
It's really hard to tell through jeans. I wouldn't worry about it unless it happens again when you're naked. ;D
(0)LMFAO your jeans must had to be like the holiday inn,,, no ball room
#26 - On 03/16/2009 at 12:05pm by lmaoscrubs
(0)stop being such a crybaby! you had jeans on, man, it can be hard to see what's going on with penises in jeans.
(0)Ok this one is FBYL...fuck both ur lives lol
You for having a small penis, and her for the very lame comment "Get hard for Me"
Don't worry too much. If it was your first time fooling around with her it might have been her first time fooling around with anybody. And by the sound of "Get hard for me", she doesn't really know what's going on. I just say, keep making out and then stick her hand down your pants. She'll figure it out.
And seriously, it's impossible to feel anything through jeans. Actually, just take all your clothes off before you start fooling around. That'll clear up any confusion.
#31 - On 03/16/2009 at 1:31pm by speesbag
(0)u were probably sagging with jeans so she wouldnt be able to feel anything anyways..
dont get selfconcious, next time just whip it out n be like.. SUCK IT
lol.. no dont do that..
(0)HAHAHAHAHA "get hard for me". Jesus. That's where the real problem's at.
#33 - On 03/16/2009 at 1:37pm by anaphaseii
(0)Lol. Sorry dude. Jeans are hard to feel a hard penis through through. Been there done that lol. Don't sweat it. You know you were hard. I agree with you #32. Next time just whip it out!!!! XDD
-Your DarkestSinn
#35 - On 03/16/2009 at 2:21pm by DarkestSinn
(0)or do a variation of what #32 said, and whip it out. but instead of telling her to suck it, just slap her in the face with it.
rofl.
#36 - On 03/16/2009 at 2:28pm by idoloveitbaby
(0)Lol @ #10. I agree though, stupid ting to say.
From a female perspective though, sometimes it's hard to tell with jeans. :/
#38 - On 03/16/2009 at 2:44pm by TheNameless
(0)lmao #21! I love Bo Burnham :) he's a friend of ours [my brother and I]
p.s. to this FML - yes, it is difficult to tell through jeans, but not... that.... difficult
(0)LOL@ 17, great quote.
@OP: Yeah, I'm gonna go with what everyone else said and guess that your jeans were hiding it, and that your girlfriend sounds kinda dumb...still sucks though.
#45 - On 03/16/2009 at 6:19pm by CinnamonSpider
(0)@19, you're totally right. Boxer breifs are so constricting. I wear them and I def don't have a small package but sometimes it seems like it. But jeans don't hide it either way.
(0)WORD "get hard for me" that screams amanda, the slut who works the corner at houston and avenue b.
(0)Hey now, it can be difficult to feel everything through jeans! Don't take it so personally, she was just trying to talk dirty.
#52 - On 03/16/2009 at 8:16pm by olivejuice
(0)lmfao. and no, it's not hard to tell through jeans.
#54 - On 03/16/2009 at 8:59pm by greedy_dead_soul
(0)you guys probably aren't making the dude feel any better by calling his gf dumb... but also not really helping... I get hard in boxer briefs and jeans and it's still quite visible.
(0)That sucks... But are you sure it's the jeans, guys? I can SEE my bf get hard when he's wearing jeans.
(0)Who says "get hard for me"? If a check has to ask someone to "get hard", she's insecure with herself and doesn't know what she's doing...
(0)when a guy has a boner in jeans and you put your hand on it, its extremely easy to tell. you must either be mad small, or your boner was going to the side and she didnt recognize it, cause alot of guys boners go to the side when they're wearing jeans since it cant go straight up.
#69 - On 03/20/2009 at 2:02pm by academicafc16
(0)if they were baggy jeans then she probably wasn't looking hard enough. I hope, for your sake. pardon the pun.
#72 - On 03/26/2009 at 8:40pm by strawberry_78
(0)either you're girl is a slut,which is well within the realm of reason,or she didn't know what she was doing.You're a beast,man!Keep that in mind
#73 - On 03/28/2009 at 4:08am by candle_lit_chaos
(0)Girls who are inexperienced sometimes really don't know what a hardon feels like under jeans. I should know, I was one of them. :P
#78 - On 04/22/2009 at 3:41pm by simplewhimsy
(0)YDI if your calling your first sexual experience with your gf "fooling around".
#79 - On 05/06/2009 at 9:12pm by Ksing27
(0)D=
Man im sorry about that,i've never had that problem,they can feel everything and they dont complain
i wear skinny jeans,and my gf can feel it perfectly,maybe she's never felt one :/
#81 - On 05/12/2009 at 5:30pm by 69Mr_CupCake69
(0)Lmao!!
Fyl indeed that sucks man I wouldn't have that problem though rofl
#84 - On 06/04/2009 at 12:01am by FML_Add1cT
(0)"Get hard for me?" what the fuck is this, open sesame? obviously inexperienced, or very insensitive.
(0)"me and my gf fooling around for the first time"? that's more odd to me that y'all are dating w/o ever fooling around more than ur toddler penis. But I guess that depends on ur definition of "fooling around."
#86 - On 06/17/2009 at 2:59am by ImaBmyLonurTees
(0)It's actually kind of indistinguishable through jeans. Could have been tucked down, even if you're hard it doesn't feel like that through jeans.
#88 - On 06/19/2009 at 12:20pm by SkyTradition
(0)hahahahahaha oh damm you ha
if i were her i would have walked out haa
#96 - On 08/15/2009 at 2:41pm by cicilovesyou
(0)hahahahahahahahha LMFAO thats sucks shouldnt have wore jeans
#101 - On 11/09/2009 at 5:04pm by THAT_ONE_PUNKER
(0)Awh. Don't feel bad. Probably one of two things happened, if not both. 1) She probably hasn't ever really fooled around before and doesn't know what a hard penis felt like. 2) You were probably wearing jeans, right? Guys jeans are alot thicker, so that makes it hard to tell as well. She was just trying to talk dirty for you so you might as well give her props for that, but as for telling her that you are hard, maybe you should just kind of shove her hand down there. If she wanted you to get hard, she wanted something else to happen, so you might as well let it happen.
#109 - On 01/12/2010 at 10:57pm by tennisplayer16
(0) awwwwwww so cute u and ur little penis. why the fuck would u admit something like this???????????
lol tinycock
#111 - On 01/18/2010 at 2:43pm by laxmonkey1440
(0)I wear jeans all the time and my gf can feel it..prob just small or in a odd place
#120 - On 03/13/2010 at 12:47pm by erich12344321
(0)lol that is honestly the saddest thing i have ever heard.
poor guy. some girls like a small penis (:
(0)lol made my day..at least you're good for something..making my day..hahah probably not what you had in mind
#123 - On 03/31/2010 at 8:15pm by MooiStories
(0)ughhhh okay is it seriously tht small?! hahhahahaahahhahhaahahahhahaha
#125 - On 04/19/2010 at 10:21pm by cooliogurl12
(0)she want that BABY DICK BABY DICK BABY DIIIICK
no, really, that sucks di...i mean, something else.
|the kid|
#126 - On 04/25/2010 at 11:30am by TheNewGuy03
(0)Let's hope you go through college and make a lot of money. ...to compensate for your small dick.
Just kidding?
#131 - On 05/12/2010 at 11:44am by Isamermaid
