Today, I went to a coworker's wedding. Instead of getting to celebrate their marriage, we spent most of the service being lectured by the priest on how women are a freak by-product of "God's masterpiece design" and are the cause of all the world's problems. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, it was supposed to be my wedding but my fiancé insisted we be married by his childhood priest, a real bible thumper. This arsehole tried to change our vows at the altar and told me wives should know their place, so I slapped him and the wedding is delayed until we get a new priest. FML
Today, it was my wedding day. Midway through the ceremony, my visibly drunk uncle stood up and denounced the minister for "preaching yer god shite where it weren't never be welcome". FML
Today, stressed to the point of breakdown over my impending daughter's birth, I went to a small church. After a long talk with the pastor, I finally began to feel some calm and peace. Too bad my wife flipped out, accused me of wanting to make her a "handmaid" and made me sleep on the couch. FML
Today, during my wedding ceremony, the groom-to-be found it appropriate to blurt out about an ongoing affair with my maid of honor. They got married instead. FML
Today, my fiancé told a priest on the bus to fuck off, because he was annoying her with all his God talk. She didn’t know the priest had been our family's priest for the past 40 years, the guy we were supposed to talk to about our wedding next year. Guess that’s not happening now. FML
Today, my stepmom aired her opinions on how marriage and children are just shackles placed on women by men to keep them miserable, downtrodden, under control, and borderline suicidal. She made this speech during my wedding reception. Oh and I’m 4 months pregnant as well. FML
Today, I congratulated a bride standing in front of a church in a white dress. Turns out she'd been stood up at the altar. She thrashed me with her bouquet. FML
Today, my coworker was talking about how he fixed his broken marriage and how his wife adores him. I asked for his advice, since mine has been rough. He started talking about God and Christianity and how religion showed him the path. Uhh... nope, I think I'll stick with things the way they are. FML
Today, I married the woman I love. I wasn't the groom, I was the minister. FML
Today, I was talking to my future mother-in-law about my upcoming wedding. She told me that I wasn't allowed to have the wedding at a church, nor wear a white dress, nor have roses for flowers, because that would mean I'd be "copying" her. FML
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Top comments
JustForRetorts 13
I wonder it he's the kind that prefers little boys...?
xXxJaGsTeRxXx 11
He's probably been single for too long..
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Comments (61)
JustForRetorts 13
I wonder it he's the kind that prefers little boys...?
blancoing 14
"Women were accidental god wants me to touch alter boys." Smh some people are sick
thatoneninjadude 14
this is why i never liked the idea of church
xXxJaGsTeRxXx 11
He's probably been single for too long..
SpamPam 18
I wonder why....
incoherentrmblr 21
Well, he's a priest, so...
gpg5 19
Why didn't the bride or groom smack him?
SofiaM0517 8
I would
incoherentrmblr 21
Unless its the priest from That's My Boy...
DanShowsNoMercy 13
If he doesn't stop soon an army of feminists will show up.
OysterPearls 33
What's wrong with that?
vairyhagina 11
He never actually said there was something wrong with that
sunnyray812 42
I'm not a feminist myself, but he probably does need an army of them to put him into his rightful place.
mannatee 19
What's wrong with it? Instead of telling him that men and women are equal, they'll start shouting that its the opposite, that men are freaks of nature.
griddy24 18
Says the dude who clearly understands nothing of feminism. God.
conman531 23
Wow. As a guy, I believe women are superior to men
enddmd 27
Amen, #6. Experience has told me the same.
King_Nero 15
No one should be viewed as superior or inferior to anyone else just because of gender or race or whatever else. It is equality for all people.
23lf 16
Someone had a problem with women. Hope she has a good wedding otherwise!
silvercamaro 22
Perhaps this problem led to him becoming a priest?
tony1891 22
Seriously? what kind of bible does this preacher read from?
Nafalgar 4
Your picture makes your comment so much better.
mageepaigeee44 15
In genesis, women are said to be slaves to men. Women are also told that they are supposed to obey their husbands. Maybe that's why the priest thinks what he thinks.
MV3_Heat_Fan 13
The same one most church people don't read
darwinism 30
Don't worry OP. The best discoveries are made by trial and error.
mackdeezy 22
Well... Someone clearly had one too many.
superwolf33 15
What kind if bible dose he read
duuuh1 11
The one with overtly misogynistic themes written by men "inspired" by god.